When you see your pdoc tomorrow, tell everything you just said about the racing thoughts and not sleeping.
You may have a mood disorder....he is the expert....ask him!
IMO....You sound really really overwhelmed and a bit manic...
No one can fix your problems for you...this is your work.
But a therapist can help you figure it out for yourself.
If you want ...You could use your blurty to write more....people read it and respond...isn't that what you wanted to do with it?
You have not been writing much there ...
or you can continue to just use this thread to write and get feed back.
It will be your thread.
Keep posting/venting...we will listen.
(((HUGS))))
bizi

im behind on like 5 visits now, ($5 per visits, and today was visit 6, I paid for the first one)

today i filled out my W2 or whatever for work and i assume that means im not getting paid for even longer. im SO mad. tomorrow im going to have to go to the Social Security office and apply for a new card, which will delay my getting paid even MORE cuz unless my boss is being cool, she wont put the paper work through till she sees it (if i apply tomorow, if its even open, then itll take 7-10 days to get) I just wanna quit this is ridiculous.

sdgsdkjkjgdand on top of it.

theres a new boy im semi interested in and he said he was as well and i asked my friend about him and she said "hes trouble" qehfkeh kick me when im down, he told me i was pretty today and after shes like "hes trouble" ....

werhglerhgergfuer :(

I guess it was nice chatting with you tonight.
HOpe that you are able to sleep.
Things will work out for you....I know they will.
Get yourself a good planner so you can plan for school, maybe your lap top has some sort of planner on it?
I hope you have a nice day at work...enjoy those kids!
bizi

I searched through microsoft word and theres no planner that would be beneficial, once i get money (whenever THAT is ) i wanna get like a daily planner from barnes and nobles or something like that...in highschool they used to give us this thing called an "assignment notebook" i LOVED it i need to find something thats close to the same thing but with like life planning too not just homework planning


qerjfgrefgherilf

planners
 

Hi,
Sometimes the colleges give out similar planners in orientation.
Or at least sell them in the book store with the other cool school supplies.

Check Outlook. I think that is has a planner. (I don't have that program on my computer because I have a Mac.
Also try googling "Free Calendars."

M.

so apparently ill get betting a check for the months worth of work on friday. lets see how that goes.

im working tomorrow but then im off till saturday. thank god.

It's sunday, meaning its supposed to be movie night with Mike, but honestly, I have no desire to go and i made other plans so yeah. he might hang out sometime this week ( i doubt it)


this might be terrible but theres kinda a new boy interest. i know i should be focusing on me, and I am but hes just saying all the nice supportive things a good friend should :) hes not very cute haha but hes very sweet, and he flat out says he likes me for me (he commented about my 'look' like all around and how he genuinely like it)

i dont even know. no meds yet. dad isnt home yet so i havent asked him for money yet.

a couple of people i know said theyd come by tonight to hang out, i asked the new boy (Dana) if he'd like to come and hes like maybe.

jfqkjr

orientation next wednesdayyy the 27thhh

It will be great to start college and have your studies to focus on.
This will be very important semester for you.
When do you get your books?
Orientation is jsut around the corner!!!!
How exciting!
bizi

We order these by the truckload...$6 each unless you buy 10 or more and then they are $2 each! (All my kids use them, as do I so we buy them 10 at a time) But they are a godsend when trying to remember who assigned what and when its due. (I used one in college, AND still use one for work)

http://www.upub.net/products/assignnotebook.htm

havent gotten my books yet, but i should hurry up, theyre SOOOO expensive tho.

thank you for the link!!
____________

so i woke up this morning at like 5:30 with the WORST headache ive ever had in my life, i couldnt move or it would hurt, so i got up to go to the bathroom and et a drive, and go outside, thinking it might help, it didnt really but i was SOOOOOO ligtheaded and dizzy and i felt RALLY weak it was REALLY bad....i finally fell back asleep for a few hours and i still feel kinda bad but its not as bad as earlier. i felt really dehydrated.

anyways. yesterday was a bad day at work. i was 10 mins late (the first time EVER) and this kid that ive never seen working there (ive been there a month and hes been on vactaion for a month) gives me attitude like, youre supposed to be outside at 2:30...so whatever he left.

THEN he comes BACK. after his shift, in regular clothes and whatever...and comes outside (im outside with BOTH sets of dogs, big and little by myself there should be 2 people) and says to me "the whole point of the job is to be out here playing with the dogs." with an attitude again... eruhfqer i was so mad. and we have a staff meeting tonight, and hes gonna be there, and i feel like he's gonna say something to our boss. the past MONTH ive been doing everything ive been told and still do, i have one bad day with the wrong kid and i feel like im gonna get yelled at tonight for it.

i need a different job ASAP as soon as i get one, im leaving there. the worst part is i got attitude for doing what ive been told to do for the past month.

They dont tell me what to do there. at all, its legit just, sit outside and do nothing. okay....and then when i do anything other then nothing, apparently its wrong. qwjejkfqe i cant even begin.


and the newish boy's girl stalker comtacted me about talking to him...stab me.qkjkhhqkerjg


i thought things were going well:(