yes tritone, surrendering control...this is a huge issue with vulnerablity.
This is why I am in therapy.
bizi

Hi bizi,
I have felt that too recently. Not knowing where I fit and how I belong. I've had sleeping problems for a couple of weeks. Started new meds. No pain, but no sleep. Not the greatest trade off. I'm learning to let go more and give more-so much of my disease takes. Even though my husband can't be open, doesn't mean that I need to stop-even if it means being open and vulnerable to myself.
No more dog's growling at each other. My doxie does snore though. Hope it's not going to be another long night....

Doxie

Yes,
And this sounds like how I have heard art / drawing described too. I guess performance needs some degree of vulnerability.

Other aspects of our day need vulnerability too -- like even some personal transactions at work.


Mari

I started reading feel the fear and do it anyway....book.
I really like it.
Discovered that I have a lot of fears!
bizi

at the support group meeting there was a man who told his story of how he was miserable in a state job, watching others sit around and do nothing while he worked his tail off and they ridiculed him and he was a victim...it all sounded awful!
HOw could he jsut take it like that, verbal abuse he was a mess! He had been putting up with this for 19 years, he had to make it another 3 to retire.
I read him part of the fear book about being a victim....and crossed talked and was embarressed for it...but anyway thought I would start a new thread.
bizi

I am not sure if I finished the thread when the box popped up.

But here goes my thoughts.

I love groups. Mainly because I need to talk through my thoughts, then listen to others thoughts too.

I also would have wanted to reach out and hug the girl. Its just my nature, and its lots of peoples. I now that recently I've been working very hard to get my image in public
up and make myself more professional.

But I wont lose the person that loves to be me.

Donna

WEll my new therapist told me that " I need to love myself"...
~sigh
bizi

That's a hard thing to do. I still have to work on it. I like myself better now. I'm proud of how you read from the book and talked with him. I don't think you should feel embarrassed.

Hugs, Doxie

PS: I probably would have felt a little embarrassed cause I'm not usually outgoing in groups.

Thanks doxie,
The reason I got embarressed was I knew what I was doing was wrong, I felt compelled to do it and did it anyway, apoligized before and after to the group for "cross talking"...I need to learn to not try to fix him, if he has been a victim at his life his whole life how on earth do I think that I can run in a be a hero for him. It is nuts! He needs to figure out how to fix his life. It is not my job but why do I act like it is??????
This is 2 weeks in a row that I felt compelled to act and was unable to show restraint......
I hope they let me stay in the group.....:o
~sigh
bizi

please do not think that you did anything "wrong"
 

Bizi,
It's not wrong.
It was only wrong in that particular group setting.
It is not wrong to do that.

Please do not feel bad.
You are going to get accustomed to how the group works and make adjustments eventually.

You might even decide that you don't like the group and want to look for something else.

That is ok.

Mari