[waves]

i had 2 african violet plants. both have undergone repotting/rerooting recently.

i had to pronounce one of my repotted violets officially dead yesterday. there was a lot of self-blame as at first i thought it was due to neglect during my migraine (several days). but the cause of death was crown rot - overwatering. that would have been from early on in the repotting. they are especially sensitive plants and usually it is best to err on the side of underwatering. but repotting/re-rooting is a particularly delicate time since being too dry will kill them as they cannot root then. so i cried still more but i realized it would have died anyway at that point. it was the violet my mother had given me when she decided my original violet was going to die (it didn't). what is sad is once it was ready to bloom and i dropped it and some leaves broke and then it stressed and lost all the buds. it made very pretty flowers - blue-lilac, laced with white, and the petals were slightly frilled. my mother suggested i repot it since i was doing my other one, even tho this one really didn't need it yet - my mother is a fan of only making a mess once. the thing is, again, it had a small bud just starting and i forgot about it. that makes me especially sad. twice it was about to bloom again and twice i destroyed it - this time, permanently.

my original one is hanging on for now. i had to water it recently and went a bit overboard, and i am afraid now. one advantage it has, ironically, is i had to completely reroot this one, so there is only a trunk stub near soil surface, which will be the first to dry out. the other one still had part of the older root system deeper in the pot. that is what would have been affected by the excess water. this one might be ok if the surface dries quickly enough. we are now getting pretty warm/hot temperature, i hope that will help dry the soil out in time to avoid rotting... even though cooler temp is better during repotting. i honestly feared this plant would be long gone by now, after chopping everything below the crown off. but i must say i have seen it nearly die before, for other reasons, but make it. so fingers crossed. i am very attached to it. i bought it myself about 3 years ago.

~ waves ~

[bizi]

Dear WAves,
I remember how important this plant is to you.
(((((((hugs))))))
beth

[befuddled2]

Waves,

barbara

[Mari]

Hi, Waves,
Thanks for talking about yourself and your violets.
I'm sorry that you lost a plant.
It sounds like you have a lot of expertise to go with your tender concern for the plants.

M.

[BJ]

Thinking of you Waves. I'm so glad you got a hug, however short it was. We all needs hugs.

[Mari]

Hi, BJ,
Great African Violet.
Hugs to you.
M.

[waves]

(from other thread since there is overlap)

Originally Posted by waves

Dear Beth, yes, all my plants are sort of sacred, but the little violet that is still hanging on is the one that is special... when i was a bit nuttier i read oracles from it.

Dear Mari, thank you and by the way that is a beautiful picture and that flower is exactly the kind (shape and coloring) my oracle violet makes. i showed the plant the picture to remind it what it could do, but told it not to worry about flowers for now and just put some roots! yes, i'm pretty kooky.

Dear Barbara, thank you for stopping in with the hugs. i really can use those. I feel for you too with your struggles with your neighbors and inlaws, and i am wishing you well.

Dear BJ, I have been concerned about you since not seeing you post much recently. hope you are doing ok. Thank you for the lovely african violet photo. not sure on this one since there is a play of light involved, but this looks also to be the same kind of flower as my "magical" plant. Similar color anyway, and same shape of flower. Yes that hug from my mother was a real surprise. I nearly lost it (in a good way sort of, if you know what i mean).

Today the top part of the soil feels a little drier. and the "diaper" was dry - lol - the double paper tissue i put under the pot to suck out the water and change it whenever it gets wet... like a diaper. still not out of the woods though, the soil is still water-laden - the pot is heavy. but hopefully near the surface it is ok. some of the stems perked up. it absorbed some water. that is not a sign of rooting - only capillary action, btw. it also does not preclude rotting. only time will tell.

it takes about 4-6 six weeks for rooting according to my mother. 2 weeks have elapsed. we have to scrape by for another month. i apologized to the violet about the water and pleaded with it not to rot. i also apologized to the dead one and sat with it a while before it went to the compost. maybe i'm not bipolar - just crazy.

i am actually not that knowledgeable about plants. my mother is and i guess some sank in from her talking over the years. some i have to ask her or look up. however she has never been able to keep an african violets. in fact she says to bottom water. so i top water and sparingly. i figure if her system kills them, use a different system. she also has a vigorous tendency to boss her plants "either you thrive or i'll compost you!" that wigs me right out. i get upset when she talks about mine like oh well if it dies it dies, so what, compost it and get another one.

i was actually insulted when she bought the second violet to "replace" my not-dead-yet one which she had written off but did not in fact die. however she said she chose it for the blooms and indeed i really liked it. i am sorry that it died. i think i feel a bit guilty because of the way i felt as to its being a "replacement" plant. poor thing.

i feel like a very elderly lady that keeps cats or something. i would keep a cat if we had the space. but no can do. so i only keep plants. and only two now (the rooting violet and my zamioculcas). actually lately i have felt like a child, not so much elderly at all, not even adult. terribly impotent.

~ waves ~ will stop rambling on now

[Mari]

Dear Waves,
I hope it is ok to tell you that I really enjoy reading about your plants.
It doesn't sound strange to talk to plants.
People talk to projects they are working on, computers, their cars, and so on.

The objects I named are inorganic.
Your plant is a living organism of course and thus available to the life force around it.


M.

[BJ]

Waves it's okay to feel like a child. I had to look this up in my journal because I know we talked about this in therapy.

She told me to feel my hurt like a child. Keep telling myself, "It's okay to feel the hurt." Let the hurt come and let it go. Cry as hard as you can. Crying is the most powerful tool for releasing hurt.


She said if you feel the hurt but there aren't any tears, fake it. Fake the tears and get into the emotion. Reach in and grab all the hurt you can and pull it out.

[waves]

a month has not passed, but

my poor dear violet has.

crown rot. even though the top soil dried quickly after the watering.

probably started before and took its time to reach the stems.

yesterday it was visible on a few leaves which i took off.

today the entire crown and all the leaf junctures are ... gone.



~ waves ~