lady is back at the vets today she is not doing too well. she was able to get in my low car , so I took her there this morning.
the vet said something about her liver may be affected...sigh....
leslie is being transfered today to the unit. She called to thank me for my assistance, I told her that I loved her....
bizi

I will pray for her. That is all I can think of to do in this situation.
I am so sorry this happened.

I must write....
I can't sleep....keep just thinking about how leslie was trying to kill her dog first then herself, the dog kept throwing up the pills and leslie kept giving her more.....how deranged she must have been. She was conviced that the three of them her deceased husband lady and herself would be reunited in heaven.
Lady dog seems to be fine, the vet said that she has severe hip dysplasia but is a chronic disease and common for german shepards. Leslie was convinced that she was dieing so she was trying to put her out of her misery. Lady is everything to her and her last link to harry.
At the emergency room she was falling asleep and having a bit of sleep apnea so they gave her narcan to counteract the narcotics she had injested which woke her up and she was livid that her plans were fouled up. I talked with her tonight and will go see her tomorrow/today...visiting hours are from 6-7. It has been along time since I have stepped on a locked unit, memories keep flooding my thoughts the last time that happened to me. These are not happy memories at all. She will get along fine, talks easily to strangers. I hope she can sleep tonight.
I am going to take extra meds right now, I need to sleep. Between me accidently killing our neighbors cat and this...I am trying to hold myself together.
bizi

Dear Beth,
Yes, keep holding yourself together.
This is hard for any friend / neighbor to deal with and harder for folks bipolar.
M.

Bizi

We are here to listen.

Donna

I saw Leslie tonight during visiting hours and she seemed fine. Agrees to see a pdoc and take meds if that is what he thinks she needs.
I think she is going to be alright. The place was decent, kind of scarey people but what did I expect? anyway....She will be able to talk her way out of there very quickly....I hope that she is sincere in all of this.
What ever happens...I can not take responcibility for her actions. I will be her friend as best that I can.
bizi

Bizi

You are always a great friend. Just remember to be a good friend
to yourself first.

Donna

Dear Beth,

When I went though something similar with my work colleague two years ago, I had a hard time.

I saw him when I could (not often) and really had to work hard to stay healthy for myself.

I hope that you are at a strong place.
Stay aware of your boundaries.
From your posts you sound ok.
Stay ok.


Is she going to get some social services?
Maybe the social worker at the hospital can be creative and get some care and attention for her.
M.

Oh, Bizi, you didn't mean to run over the cat. That's one of the worst things that could have happened to you. And it happened to you, you didn't do it. Cats sleep right up under car tires, and you can't see them. You did a wonderful thing for your neighbor, and it sounds like her dog is going to be okay. You have just been through it for all your trouble. Your neighbor doesn't have to be alone. Unless she is housebound, there are all sorts of community things to get involved in. She can later contribute to the SOS board and make a good argument for staying alive. "Oh, when the Lord get ready, you got to move." Not before. And we can't know what it means to die, except that it is the end of chances to get ready to die. Bless yourself for all that you have done. billie

This cat was in front of me and I honked for him to get out of the way and inched my way up and he ALWAYS MOVES....except that horrible day when he did not.

I have not been sleeping well all week....have been missing clients in the morning, think I am caught up with every body now after some jumbling....
My neighbor may be coming home tomorrrow.
When I was in the ER with her she was madder than a hornet that "you all " interveined and took away her dignity and right to die.
She told me three times that she was just going to do it again.
So yesrterday on the phone I reminded her of what she said and she said that was not an option any more that was a one time ordeal and that she " swore to God" that she would not do it again.
Her friends went in the house last night to look for the rest of the guns that the police did not find so hopefully they found them. They could be turned into the police if needed. We took the rest of her oxycontin away.
(There were hundreds of pills).
Her dog lady will be so happy when she gets home and so will leslie who is miserable and scared in that place, there were daily lock down incidents.....
I am going to be her friend as best as I can be.
This will be hard and I will have to set up good boundaries and set limits for her behavior. I hope this doesn't sound harsh it is just the truth.
bizi
who hopes to be sleeping better soon.....