[Lara]

Originally Posted by redjpwranglergirl

if you didn't kiss the mods or "another person's" @%*, your posts were censored, you were warned, or you were banned) you didn't have a snowball's chance in ^#@% there. And I'm not talking about JL....It was so obvious that you couldn't miss it. And if we're honest, those of us who posted at bt for several years knew that there were certain people on each forum who were bullet-proof.

Nothing personal towards you, redjpwranglergirl, but I think that's really unfair to all the other people who didn't get banned or didn't get their posts censored or never got warnings etc.. Does that make me someone who kisses someone's **** or is in some sort of inner circle with the mods? No, it does not. I've used that site for 10 years on and off since it was really and truly the wild wild web. None of it is all positive and all negative to me.

Originally Posted by redjpwranglergirl

Going back to bt at this or any point would be like putting your hand back on top of a red hot stove after you'd already done the same thing yesterday and got burned."

Well, call me a fool then. I know you're not really calling "me" a fool, but see I've not been in the same situation as a lot of people obviously have been. I really don't care if you all do think I'm a fool, but that would be a real shame because I am not a fool. I still post there and as long as there are people looking for information in the TS forum there and as long as the Autism forum continues I will continue to do so, and as long as some of my friends continue to post there and as long as there are new people looking for information which they might not get otherwise, I will continue to do so.

It's that important to me to continue to keep up with current scientific information in my areas of interest and it's that important to me to try to make sure that if someone new comes along they're not inundated with misinformation and go off totally lost in a crisis situation, particularly in the Tourette's forum although it's basically died now over there.

Also as long as there are people posting on the SOS forum there I will attempt (and this one is the hardest one believe me and the members here will know why it's the hardest one)... I will attempt to give them a hand to hold or even just for them to know that there is someone out there somewhere who understands a little about what they are feeling at that very moment. If I'm scrolling down the list and see someone needs someone or something, I'll answer if I can.

I absolutely and totally understand why some of my friends who are here do not post there. Absolutely. They're my friends. However, I have friends at BT as well. I'm not going to walk away totally from the friends I've made there who didn't come over here.

I just plod along doing my best. Here and there and other places. As long as my brain is working and my fingers can still type and I have some time in the day that's what I'll continue to do. I take breaks from everywhere from time to time and I attempt to stay out of situations that are none of my business and I also try to focus on why I am here and why I am there and just do what I do. I really dislike all this "us" and "them" stuff. It sure makes me feel a little lost that's for sure.

Geez, now you've really made me wonder again. I hope my friends here understand why I do both 'cause I truly do understand why they do not.

[Lara]

Had to go put the vegies in the casserole so we can eat tonight.
I forgot something and didn't want to edit my previous post.

I don't live with my head in the sand you know. I too get angry about it all and I too actually get sad about it all. It hurts me to see bad things done to good people and people who I care about. I probably know as much or more about things that have gone on as the next person. It's just that I made a choice to continue to use that site and to continue to use this site. There was a mass exodus at one time a long while ago from over there and I lost contact with so many people who meant so much to me. I found them again here and it means the world to me. I often do wonder though if any of them gave me a fleeting thought at the time.

well, that's it I guess. I try not to post on these threads unless I have something I feel is important to say but I'll probably stay away from it all again now. Chill out.

Lara... Lost in Space - Part II. LOL

[Chemar]

I really think it is a good idea, as I mentioned at the start of this thread, for us ALL to be sensitive to one another here, and especially to the members who post at both sites.

Every time we get one of these threads, people get hurt or offended on one or other "side"
I understand these feelings and I am not trying to in anyway invalidate them.
Rather, I would just encourage us to move forward and stop looking back.

Our two communities will always have a connection, that is our history

It would be nice if we could have a present and a future of peaceful co-existence, especially for the sake of the members who do have dual participation

[Alffe]

Lara the world is a better place because you are in it. No explanations necessary about the whys of what we do. I'm just grateful for your efforts and for your friendship.

[jena1225]

The really odd thing is that there is so much BT bashing from this site, yet when you go over there, you just don't see it.

I have been there quite awhile, and can tell you I have never noticed any of the things you refer to, That does not mean it did not happen, it just means I never felt the need to get involved in the drama, even though I did not even know there was any to be had! Those who chose to are the only ones who got hurt. They say when you know too much....

I just post by asking for support and offering support, that is it.

Lastly, for those of you who refuse to ever post there again b/c of the "mods" are not hurting the people who run it, you are hurting the people looking for support, by really taking it out on them. It's like biting off your nose to spite your face

Most people are good, with a few bad seads, but you have them here too, Try not to fool yourself into thinking they are not

I think you guys here at BT2 should think twice when not replying to BT'ers when we visit here, and start treating everyone as if they are real people looking for real support

[Chemar]

jena

the history was last year and there was a lot of stuff said by people on both boards then. So it is important to get that into perspective.

Many people did get very hurt and many of the feelings are justified. Just because some were not aware of things that were happening, certainly does not give cause to invalidate what DID happen, jena.


BUT


We have members from both communities here and we have as much care and support for those who consider BT home and just visit here as we do for our own. Both boards have valued members who give and need support. To suggest that members here dont support those visiting from BT is just not accurate...the situation is quite the opposite as a visit around the forums shows

I really am politely requesting that this thread not deteriorate into attacks on members from either side. Discussion is ok....but comments that point fingers and build on rumour and innuendo are not helpful to anyone.

BT is back up, so this thread really has run its course now.

We do believe in open discussion here at NeuroTalk, but this discussion, which was intended to help BT members when their boards were down, is no longer focussing on being helpful and supportive, and is bringing out past hurts and rubbing salt in old wounds.

PLEASE would everyone think and edit before they post words that could hurt an innocent member just by the way they are lashed out.

I appreciate everyone's cooperation.

thanks
Cheri

[kimmydawn]

I just want to back up what Chemar has said in regards to respecting the choices, decisions, and practices of all here...even though they're different in comparison to our own.

Some were hurt, some were upset, some felt panic even. Those are feelings that belong to some even though we might not share them. It doens't mean that they don't exist for several to many.

I agree that discussion is GOOD because we do have many members that frequent both sites. BUT, because we do, we need to be supportive to that in our responses as well as the upset that is still there for many.

One way to help minimize hurt is to use "I statements", not "you" as they feel accusitory and can make others feel defensive. Please don't tell another that their decision, or feelings, are wrong or not justified. Please don't tell another that their choices and perceptions are wrong.

Overall, please remember that there are members here that frequent both sites and try to check your posting for something that might feel attacking to anyone. Talk about your concerns, talk about your fears, talk about your likes or dislikes, talk about your experiences, but please refrain from pointing out another's as wrong or inappropriate because those same things differ from your own.

We're all just doing our best to manage our individual self-care in many ways. We all have that in common. It's a good "base" ground to stand on, yes?

KD

[Doody]

Originally Posted by jena1225

I have been there quite awhile, and can tell you I have never noticed any of the things you refer to, That does not mean it did not happen, it just means I never felt the need to get involved in the drama, even though I did not even know there was any to be had! Those who chose to are the only ones who got hurt. They say when you know too much....

Hi Jena. I know several people who were hurt and really needed the place. Long-time members in good standing, if you will; since the mid-90s. They didn't 'choose' to get involved in drama. The drama was, for the most part, imposed on them. People who should have been warned and banned, and their threads deleted, weren't. One of those causing the hurt is still there and in a leadership capacity; hence, some of us who know that don't go there.

Saying that those people chose to get involved in drama were the only ones who got hurt is...well, a slap on a lot of their faces in my opinion.

We already hashed out all of this when NeuroTalk first started.

Kimmy Dawn, Chemar, Curious or one of you lovely people...isn't there something that could be done about updates? I mean, is there a link to Doc John's blog or daily reports or whatever he does, that people could refer to when BT goes down?

From what I've read here, BT doesn't allow links to this place, however...when something goes wrong, NT ends up with people looking for help.

Not sure exactly what I'm asking for. An obvious link to Doc John's news briefs?

[jena1225]

Are you serious? Why is it that when you all have an opinion, it's ok because you are "cranky", yet when soome happens to make a state they believe to be true, it's a slap in the face:

DoodyAs I've said before a couple of times, I love this place. It may still be growing, but quite frankly...I get really tired of hearing about BT1. Once upon a time, it was a nice place.

And here I go 'cause I'm of the mood, but friends of mine were treated poorly there, we're here now, and BT is a thing of the past for me. So, I guess now I'll ignore, plug my ears, and not look at BT1 threads again.

This is NeuroTalk.

DoodyArtist, I'm just venting. One too many funerals and mishaps lately and I hope today's funeral was the last one I have to go to in a very long time.

It's just that, if people get started in on BT, it STILL gets my heart racing just a little bit more because believe me, I do have ill will going on regarding that place and certain persons in particular, and being the snotty brat that I am, I can't hold my opinions in to myself when I start getting reallllllly mad. I'm sorry for your folks who still go there.

I can see this all snowballing down a big hill so to that I say....

Seem as if there is a big double standard here, and this may very well not stop.

I am not the type to get "bullied" out of expressing my thoughts and opinions. To my knowledge, I have not attacked anyone, pointed my finger, mentioned ANYONE'S name, although alot of that has gone on here.

Perhaps you feel defensive because I said things you did not "agree" with, and I am not in your "group" or what have you, but come on

[redjpwranglergirl]

Lara and everyone else,
I'm sorry if I offended anyone with my comments- they weren't directed at you, Lara, or anyone else. As I stated, I was speaking for MYSELF and stating the way I felt about bt. No where in there did I say that anybody who still reads/posts there is a fool or anything else and I don't feel that way. Maybe things were different in different forums there- I don't know. I just felt that I had a right to state an opinion here as much as anyone else does. It didn't occur to me that I'd be attacked for it. In the months since NT started, I've seen some pretty ugly things said to some people and about a number of different topics but I just read it and if I had something to say, I'd post and if I didn't, I'd just keep reading. Even though I've read some things that were extremely against my personal beliefs, I let it go- you never saw me reply to them. And that's because I feel that while I strongly disagreed with the things being said, that those people were entitled to their opinions- and I have to tell you, some of the things said were VERY offensive to me. While I am known for saying what I think, I don't try to go out of my way to offend anyone or be purposely ugly to anyone. I feel like you have as much right to post here as I do and I don't expect everyone to always agree with me or anyone else. If that were the case, the world would be extremely boring. Again, I apologize to Lara and anyone else I offended. Possibly I didn't make myself clear enough in my post that I was only speaking for myself, although it never occured to me that I was calling anyone stupid or a fool. And possibly it's best that I don't post an opinion on the Community Feedback again because it's not worth it if it ends up hurting someone else, which wasn't my intent. The only other comment I have is, a forum is a forum for everyone, whether we always agree with them or not. And again, I'm sorry if I did hurt anyone and I wasn't trying to take this thread in a bad direction.