here's the windows live hotmail link - maybe you can re download it or find the answer on the pages there.
http://get.live.com/mail/features


or maybe a system restore back to before it disappeared/messed up would work?

this is hard to advise on without being there and seeing it in person.
Do you have any computer savvy friends or relatives near by?
you might just need someone to sit down and figure it out for you.

I'm still not sure which of your programs is the one with the missing tool bar??

OH I just thought of something to try-
press Alt f or Alt v while you have the problem program open and see it the File or View tools come up.