Hi, I usually post on the RSD or PN sections of this wonderful site but I need some advise. My husband and I are caring for my mother-in-law who has stage 4 lung cancer. I have known this woman for 30 years, she is strong, generous beyond what she ever has to be, smart and just the best mother in law I could have ever asked for. She is living with us for the last 4 weeks and we are doing the taking back and fourth for chemo, doctors etc. and we live a hour plus away from her area so that is hard on her but what can you do.
To complicate matters she had a pipe burst under her house she did not realize it and now it's a big problem but my husband is meeting with contractors so that it can be fixed. She can not go home because there is quite a bit of mold that came into the house and everything in the basement, that just got remodeled, has to be re-done. Once it is we will take her back and my husband and I will take shifts living there because we have children,teenagers they don't need 100% care but there teenagers, good ones but I don't think I need to say anymore.

Here's our problem. I sorry that I rambled above. She has just given up. She has her own room in our home but will not do anything for herself. I mean she does not move not even to go the bathroom. She hardly eats we try believe me we have to almost force her to drink. My concern is that I think her cancer is much further along than even her doctors know. This is a example of one of my concerns that might be showing she is close to death. She does drink during each day but she does not urinate. I was here alone on Tuesday she got up I asked her if she needed help going to the bathroom and she said know I'll wait she never got up until I insisted at 2pm she just walk around the house and then she stopped at the bathroom. Could her kidneys be failing? Isn't all that laying flat dangerours in regards to blood clots?

I will be asking a lot of questions on Monday at the oncologist, I have cared for people who have cancer and doing chemo but I have never seen someone just lay in bed day after day and not move. Please if anyone has any advise please I'll take anything. I also know she is very depressed.

Thank you all for listening,

Gabbycakes