Hi Justice

My father died 11 years ago on Fathers day. i hpoe my poem helps a little.

Can i make it through this day, will my heart, and mind hold out
will the tears subside today, and if need be can i shout.
Will i be able to carry you aloft, inside your wooden box?
Will time stand still, no 'tick no tock' upon the church yard clock.
Will my eulogy to you, describe your life, and fill the church with tears.
Will the congregation share my loss, their you friends, your colleagues, your peers.
The time has arrived to say goodbye, with a rose in hand and a tear in the eye.
I wish you peace and rest forever, my one true friend, the best forever.
Let the church bells ring, and hearld you leaving this earth.
May the angels above prepare for your death, and the beauty of re-birth.


Take care of you

Dear Justice,
I felt compiled to write you, first i would like to say I'm sorry you lost a wonderful friend, father, loved one. Even throw I know my sorry will not bring him back, nor take your anger, or your pain away. You and I do have some things in command with each other. Like not accepting death. Like you i lost a loved one that was like a father to me. It OK to be angry, but it how, or what you do with that anger THAT COUNTS. I found it helped to write ever thought i had about my Uncle Dave down in a journal. Like you I could never do no wrongs,he was always there for me, he always expected me for who i am, and I was the apple of his eye; we even had the same b-days just many years apart.
I took time and went to his grave, and told him i was angry for him leaving me. But deep down i knew he was suffering from his cancer. When it got really bad as i held his hand i even prayed for him to go home, Because of seeing him in such pain, well he was just to good of a man to deserve such suffering he endured. So I PRAYED, and told him it was OK to let go, cause i loved him to much not to let him go. Which I later felt guilty for. when I went to his grave It was just his and mine time. i CRIED, i YELLED till i couldn't any longer.
It's been over 11 years now, I'm so glad i wrote that Journal, cause I'm able to look back and remember all the wonderful times we had.
But most of all I'm able to share them, the parts i want too at lest, with my kids that never really got to know him.
I also look at his passing as his new begins which he will be there when my time comes, and what joy, and giggles we have when we do. I could almost see him telling me, you silly gal all that crying over me, when i never left you at all with a slap to the shoulder. In his witty ways. I also know he loved me enough not to want me to give up nether,nor to stop living. I know your father loved you, and most defiantly wouldn't want you to let anger and grief spoil you, and your life. I do believe they can hear us up there in heaven. It OK to cry, never be ashamed to, it's prof that your human, and validates your love for him.
But most all what kept me going is knowing I had to live to keep him alive, cause he lives life threw me, and my story's about him, and in my Journal I will leave on earth when I'm long gone. By doing so Keeps him alive forever.
Allow your self time to grieve. Your taking the right steps, it help when you talk about him. Others and my self are good listener any time you need one, or a shoulder to cry on if needed. Oh and Pillows do come in handy for those day of anger. You in my thoughts,
Sincerely Roze

i dont know if this will help, it works for me sometimes.... sometimes i read it and laugh more times at the moment i cry but that helps as well.

You can shed tears that he is gone,
Or you can smile because he lived,
You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left.

Your heart can be empty because you can't see him
Or you can be full of the love that you shared,
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember him and only that he is gone
Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on,
You can cry and close your mind be empty and turn your
back,
Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes,
love and go on


its been 5 months since i lost my dad to an aortic aneurysm, or in other words someone pulling the rug from under you and hitting you over the the head. i left him the night before,with a hug thankfully and he was gone by 10.am the next day. doesnt matter how hard i try it still feels like yesterday..

tc steash.

hi i to am struggling with this loss. my dad died jan 24, 2007. i do not have any ideal how to deal with this. that is why i have came here. i to am searching for answers. i feel as if my entire world has ended. i am 40 years old, married, have a 15 year old son, a brother and sister, and my mom is living with me now. with this many people around me i can not figure out why i feel so alone. my dad died with copd. i watched for almost a month as he struggled to breathe. he became like a stranger near the end. withouot the right amount of oxygen he begin to be out in left field. i was there the night he passed on. it has been almost a year and each night i close my eyes i not only hear his last breath i also see it. mediciene does not help with the sleep issue.