insomnia...as usual.
sorry i didn't see this. i went offline to read a book.
hope you got more rest.

.

But how do you grieve? Is there a "proper" way? And along with remembering comes many, many tears. Who wants to be around someone that's a blubbering mess all the time? It's the holidays and you're supposed to be happy shopping, decorating and going to parties. Why is there such sadness? Why is this the time of year when so many on the edge go over? It's a mystery to me.

bj,

we all grieve in our own way. if blubbering helps you heal...then blubber. and you don't have to be merry and happy. it does help to remember as many good and fun memories as you can. share them. silly stories.

you have sadness because you miss them. sadness because of what they are missing.

people have such a hard time right now because holiday memories are usully some of the strongest. easiet days to remember. festive fun times with ones we loved that are no longer here. but it up to us to keep those memeories live. to create new ones for ourselves and future generations.

((((bj))))

bj~ the title is coping with grief and loss. My husband has only been gone 4 mos. now. A part of me died too and in time I will get better. I don't grieve all the time. We were married 47 yrs. Just wait, you will see, if you are married. It does hurt to lose a mate. I married for life and I still could live a long time.
Fancylady

Maybe my pdoc that I fired hit a nerve when he said I don't know how to grieve. No I don't. I tried to decorate on Sunday and everything I pulled from the box reminded me of my mom so I put it all away. I went to the mall thinking that would put me in the spirit and I got angry. I thought how could everyone be so cheery. I know this is selfish and I hate being like this but the pain is real and I can't do anything about it. I'm angry at myself for being like this.

(((BJ))) Please don't feel ashamed. Everything you are feeling is normal for a grieving daughter. We are here for you...I miss you. Love, Alffe

This has been bothering me since I edited it and I have to get it out. The reason I edited it was that I said I was angry at God. I'm not though, He just confuses me sometimes.

When I was in the hospital the pdoc there said there's 5 stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. They don't happen in any particular order. When I posted that I was angry. At who? I don't really know. My mind was all over the place and then I hit bottom. That's when I did "it". And this is where I'm stuck right now. I'm sorry I said it and I didn't mean to but I was out of control. I hope you understand.