Popple... While there are similarities in our cases, there are clear differences too. I had a onlay on my tooth from many, many years ago. I'm not even sure why it was there. If I had to guess, I would say a small crack. It fell off. Because I had to travel for personal reasons, I wanted it replaced. I had no discomfort of any kind. Cold, hot, pressure...nothing/nada. It was as if it didn't matter. No discomfort at all. I just didn't want to get caught in another city with a dental issue. I was trying to be preventative. OMG! What a mistake.

The dentist insisted on putting on a crown. GRRRR! She had weird problems putting on the crown. Many re-do's....just too much to go into. Much time elapsed. The owner of the practice had to get involved. Ended up with extreme, electrical pain.... I had trouble describing it...it was so extreme and foreign to me. Then, I went on my journey to stop the pain. I probably would have had better luck going to a witch doctor.

I never had tooth sensitivity. I also didn't have some of these other things you've mentioned. A cold breeze, today, bothers my face. If a cold wind hits the skin on my face, I get extreme nerve pain. I also can't tolerate vibration.

The swollen lymph node in your neck is concerning. Not being able to move your neck is different than the pain I suffered/suffer from.
However, I have had very odd and very strong pains in my ear from the beginning (after a good month or so that my first dentist was working on the crown...yes, she was taking THAT long to put on a crown and the owner dentist worked on my tooth...blah blah blah) And I've read others with neuralgia talk of pains in the ear as well.

I'm glad you are very reluctant to do the root canal. It sounds like a idea......just because a particular dentist is at a loss of what to do. This happened to me. At a loss...so do a root canal, pull the tooth, etc.

Glad you are taking your time and reviewing your options. Ask around about good dentists/oral surgeons, etc. in your area. Consider also going to any dental universities for opinions. It is a long process, so I know it is very tough. A friend of mine went to a dental university and got really top notch treatment.

Bryanna...Sure wish the ADA would get their act together. They don't even acknowledge that amalgam fillings are not good for patients. Not sure if we'll be alive by the time they even investigate honestly (...what a laugh) root canals!
Wishing you well!!!!