I just wish he could understand that I did this, because, I was
so upset, because, I couldn't help *him*!!

Phyllis

In case, anyone else has any thoughts???

Phyllis

You can only do the best you can do. Your heart was in the right place. Sometimes a person who is depressed is very sensitive. Hopefully he will realize in your effort to help him, you talked about him to try and help the situation. I have done this too, my son is depressed, and I had to talk to others to be able to cope, and try and help. Maybe with a little time, you can explain to him how much you care. ginnie

I could shake him and make him see that this wasn't a matter
of him, not, being able to trust me, anymore!!
I'll be seeing him on Wednesday. What, the hell, do I say/ do???

Phyllis

Make it about him Phyllis, not about you. He probably feels that you can't handle his "dumping" on you so he shouldn't do it anymore. I would apologize to him, given the opportunity to do so in private, and tell him that you only want the best for him and will try to help, if listening helps.

It may not help, BUT, I KNOW, it can't mess things up more, than, I have,
already!

Phyllis

Tell him you are sorry, that you didn't know it would hurt him. Do it in private like alffe said. Ask for forgiveness. If forgiveness isn't in his nature, and he spurns your attempt to say you are sorry, he might not have been that good of a friend to begin with. Friendships work both ways. It is important to beforgiving each to the other. I have said I am sorry to my best friend before. Because there was real love there, I was forgiven and we moved on to have even a better friendship than we had before. I really hope that this person in your life will see that you so much wanted to help. In life we need all the good people around us as we can have. Remember it works both ways, and do not be so hard on yourself if things don't work as you hoped. You cannot "make" another individual see your points of view. You can only hope, that you both can rise above this situation and continue on with a good friendship. I wish you all the best. ginnie