______________________

i am sorry that happened to you.

it was on a different web site right?

((((firemonkey)))

you aren't evil and nasty.

i understand how youcan get stressed when you feel that people don't like you. it's not a good feeling.

can you try and not post on the site that moved your post?

and if you ever have a doubt about a post here...you can always pm it to me or ny of the mods first. we want you to get all the support you can from us and the members here.

Hey, it could be worse. You could be me. You get posts removed. I get removed from family functions and shut out even when my father is desperately ill in the hospital or a sibling dies. I'm not told until my father is on the mend and then am told to not come, you are not needed. I am told that my presence would upset people...

so as you see, it could be worse.... And even worse, no matter how polite and kind and reasonable and such I am, I will forever be punished for something I did over 20 years ago. Yep. All this because I screwed up once. AND FESSED UP TO IT --- when I could have just been a coward and pretended to know nothing.

My biggest sin - being different. I don't play the family games. And that terrifies people.

Hugs
Teri

Dear Tim,
That stinks.
I can see how it would feel hostile and off putting.
Mari

I'm really sorry that you're both going through so much at present.

Teri,
I can very much relate to the ways that family members can treat others so disgustingly badly for being 'different' especially. I never had to go through that with really close family though 'cause I didn't have any of my own as my parents died very young and I was sent off to live with extended family, plus I didn't have sisters or brothers, but if I did and they were ill now, I can't imagine the hurt I would feel if I had been treated the way you describe. I actually distanced myself altogether from so-called family a very long time ago for similar reasons I guess.

I'm very sorry to read that you've lost your sister.

Lara
a black sheep

Dear Tim ....

No, you aren't Nasty & Evil when you get stressed. You used to ACT "socially inappropriately" and use vulgar offensive language, but you have learned to control that. You now post about how you FEEL. But feeling isn't "being Nasty & Evil", it is just FEELINGS. Feelings are real stuff, your stuff, and they are REAL to you, even if you later think a lot and change your feelings.

When people read your telling about how you FEEL, no one can hate you for your feelings. They are your real feelings. And many of us feel very happy to see you expressing your FEELINGS, not just saying bad words born of upset.

And sometimes when you FEEL upset, you announce that you are leaving, but that too is not Nasty & Evil. And when you come back to us, we are happy.

Tim, YOU ARE NOT NASTY. AND YOU ARE NOT EVIL. It is NOT BAD for you to have upset feelings. It is NOT BAD for you to talk about those feelings.

You have what psychoanalysts call a very punitive SuperEgo. Who punishes your Id severely, making you THINK you are Nasty & Evil. But you have learned to make your Ego strong - strong enough to govern your Id and modulate just how your Id expresses itself. You have done good. Real good.

And we are proud of you.

And I apologize for being so upset about myself that I couldn't respond to you in the past two days. It took a lot of giving here, posting articles for forums, to thaw the frozen horror of the past week and start feeling for others again.

Hugs to you, Tim.
Teri

where was that?they do that at times

think before you click send

(((((( Tim ))))))

I'm sorry that happened. I hope your were given explanation as to why? I think that's necessary when a mod/admin acts with a post/thread.

I want to reassure you that if a post of yours here is moved/edited/deleted, you would be PM'ed with a full explanation for your own understanding and in effort to work through any difficult times.

I hope you're able to have a wonderful evening.

KD

Hi Tim,

I don't think you are nasty or evil.

I'm sending you lot's of hugs.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Tim))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))




Linda