Tricia, it was difficult in the beginning when I gave up my car. One, because I can still drive when my vision is good. Two, because even though I rarely went anywhere anyway I always had the option to go if I wanted to. Now, I just can't. I can use DS's cars when I need to go somewhere but I feel like I'm being an inconvenience.

I've gotten used to being home most of the time. It doesn't bother me anymore. On days I do go somewhere it wears me out! Being alone doesn't bother me, either. In fact, most of the time I prefer it. But I do love having my kids around.

It was just too expensive for me to keep a car and all of the expenses that go along with it. As rarely as I drive it just wasn't practical. But, I've learned how to stretch a dollar and some good budgeting practices while being on SSDI. Everytime I hear on the news that they're planning to cut more out of the SS budget it scares me.

I'm pretty sure my gait looks weirder than it feels .

My gait is kinda like a penguin walking. I saw some penguins on the National Geographic channel the other day and my first thought was "gosh, I walk like they do"!

My gait changes. My gait is bouncy sometimes. Other times, I think I look wobbly. Then other times, it's more of a limp. But, then again, I have never seen myself walk so I guess this is just how I feel when I walk and what I think I look like. The bouncy gait I know I have as both DDs have commented on it. The drunk gait I know I have and so does some of the bushes I've fallen in to. LOL

Wow...this is like "insights for MS peeps"...

I am mad at my neuro. I went in a couple of weeks ago, because my legs are so bad...the right one isn't walking right, the foot is goofy when I walk. He did notice that change.
But I have had so much pain when I walk for awhile, so much trouble with arm weakness...and all he did was "See you in six months."

So I am taking my care into my own hands. My requip isn't working as well again. In the past, I would call him, and he would take me off of it for two weeks and put me on gabapentin. I hate going off of requip. It is nerve-racking because my legs are jumpy almost all night the first two nights. So now I am just adding gabapentin to the requip the way my old neuro did. I don't have to go through withdrawal, and I feel better immediately.

I am not going to call him any more when something new crops up. Why bother, when he doesn't do anything different? It's an hour drive one way, then I wait for an hour because he talks so much he's an hour behind, and then I get no changes in treatment.

I have a definite prejudice against the medical profession.

How am I feeling? I need a root canal and could not get an appointment with the specialist until August 4th.

Don't feel bad, Debbie. I had the same exact experience on Monday. I asked for PT but he said it wouldn't help. My left leg is being all gimpy and I'm not walking correctly. This makes my hips and lower back hurt.

Other than the icky weather, my weak legs, achy breaky joints, the fact that I can't seem to get enough sleep, my age and the dam MS, I'm just fine, TYVM..

its very humid here this morning, but I walked anyway. Quickly went blind, but kept on trudging. im pooped! I need some time to recover from that. Humidity is my enemy. I am going to shower, and let the DH cook me an egg. Then I need to go do errands.

Today, I am trying something different. Since mornings have been rough on me, I usually shower in the afternoon. But, I noticed that on the days that I take my shower in the morning, I seem to do better all around. So, I showered this morning in hopes of a better day. I dragged my shaky legs in to the shower and made myself do it. I have fallen too many times in the shower lately so I wanted to get it done before DBF left for work. I'll let you all know how the experiment goes. The only down side of this, when I take my shower in the afternoon/evening it cools me down and relaxes the muscles. I guess I could still do that as well.

The hug is still here. I know I should be flattered that it loves me so much it wants to just hug me all day 24/7, 365 days of the year. But I am not flattered. Ice is in order for the day as well. I may even call my massage therapist and see if she can come today instead of tomorrow. I know she gets up real early but I'm waiting until 8 to give her a call. She lives a couple of streets away from me. I didn't know that when I first called her. These massages have been helping me so much!!!

The heat and humidity have taken away some of my focus, concentration, and motivation, to an extent. So, today I am going to try to push through that and find some detailed work to do. That basically means, detailed design work.

Off to a better day today and learning new ways to deal with some of the loneliness I have been feeling lately.