Dear neuro, I am so sorry that life has been such trauma for you. My heart goes out to you. I wish there was some magic thing I could say to ease your heart and soul. When I hear posts such as yours, it makes me realize how much we need each other when life presents such hardship and pain. There are so many of us with severe challenges, that I often cannot come up with the words to help a person. I care about you and I wish things would get better for you. Please keep coming back to this site. I will listen and respond. There is compassion here, and group of loving human beings, who will be there for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers this very minute, even though I can't come up with the words to help. I hope you find some peace in your life. ginnie