It all depends on who is asking and why as to what I might share with them.
Having said that, I think that it is vitally important to have at least one person who knows what is going on with us and who can just be with it, without feeling the need to remedy the situation. This forum really does serve that purpose. Thank you.

A friend who is my confidant once said this to me.
"I don't know what to say or what to do when things are not good for you. What is the best response to someone who is having problems that I don't have a solution for? Part of me just wants to hide or avoid them, yet I feel badly when I do."

I told her that the best response is the honest one. "I'm sorry that you are going through this."

Nothing more needs to be added. Offers of assistance are appreciated for sure, but just the expression of compassion can be the greatest gift to both the one who is suffering and the one who wishes that the situation were different. It gives both the courage to face the most difficult of situations.

It is hard when our friends drift away and I've even had the experience of someone who I was close to once, avoid me in a public place when she saw that I was on crutches. I know that it was fear on her part...the not knowing what to say...so she ducked away into the crowd for safety. It broke my heart and I wished that I could have told her that a simple "I'm sorry...", works when we don't know what else to say.
It replaces our fear with courage when we encounter those who are having problems of any nature.

When I have shared this response as a suggestion to others who have friends and relatives that are facing challenges, they have been thankful to know that such a simple response is all that it takes to maintain the bond...no strings attached.

How sad that many adults don't know this...but most children do.

Erika