[EricP]

Went to Arbys tonight wearing my old MS Awareness shirt from last May's charity walk that is Orange with a ribbon. The girl there saw it and asked if it was for Leukemia and apparently her 20 year old friend passed away from it last June 26 I told her no that it is for MS Awareness and I was so sorry to hear the news of her friend. I think it sucks, so young, are you kidding me? and here I am thinking "OMG I have MS, dear me" While MS sucks balls, it sucks to hear of some young woman dying so young from some devastating disease, by far worse than MS(for some of us)

Makes me feel guilty for all the woe is me, moments, but in our defense....MS is hard to live with...sometimes we wish we were dead. but.....just so sad to hear of this young girl dying from Leukemia and I wish I could of said or done more for the girl who told me, but ....all I could say is so sorry.

Uggg these diseases SUCK!!

[Snoopy]

Eric, don't feel guilty

In life you will always find someone else who has it worse than you. It shouldn't minimize what you are experiencing.

Compassion and empathy for everyone. You never know what someone may be going through.

[Erika]

Well said Snoopy.

Eric, sometimes just sincerely saying sorry is the best expression of compassion and understanding for one who is grieving.

With love, Erika

[Jules A]

Your consideration and concern indicate how caring you are so I would bet this came across to the young lady who lost her friend.

Very soon after I was diagnosed a friend in her early 30s was diagnosed with breast cancer and passed away a couple of years later so I try to think of her when I'm feeling sorry for myself.

[Debbie D]

Kindness and empathy are very great in you...however, don't invalidate what you're going through. Everyone is dealt a hand in life-some get a pretty good one, others get the worst. Its all different.
It's a good idea to remember that we all carry different sized crosses in our journey through life...we just don't always see them (like MS). Thanks for the reminder

[tkrik]

Ok Eric - You are a very kind and sensitive man with great feet. What other wonderful traits are you going to surprise us with?

I'm so sorry to hear about both of these young women. I say both because one suffered with her cancer and passed away and the other for watching her friend go through this and being left behind to deal with the grief. At 20, we think of ourselves as invincible and immortal, in a sense, and when death happens at a young age, it effects those left behind. It is much harder for a 20 year old to accept death than a 50 year old. DD23 had a friend pass away when he was 19 and she was 20. He got influenza and never recovered. It was so sad and DD took it really hard as did all of her friends. She was at the hospital when he passed away. I saw the difference in how death effected these young kids and how it effected older people. It appeared much more difficult for the younger ones.

There isn't much that you could have said to the young woman. Sometimes just listening is the best that you could have done for her and it sounds like you did just that. And, the next time you go in to Arby's you can ask her how she's doing and just listen.

Lastly, excellent post Debbie! She is right! Don't discount what you are going through. MS is a tough battle sometimes and it's a life long battle. There's good days and bad days. Everyone ends up with something and we each learn to endure our suffering, and sometimes, we learn to embrace it. And, as Debbie said, we all have a cross to carry in this journey of life and it's those that help us carry the cross that make the journey that much better.

[EricP]

Thanks, everyone.

It was indeed a sad thing to hear and I do consider myself a decent man, but I have to admit that even though through my life I have been pretty much considerate like that, After getting my Dx and going into the world of MS and studying other human ailments I have become MUCH more aware, sensitive and depressed over all the things Humans can get and live with.
Before MS I was like any other person and I have gotten into trouble in life. I have a criminal record, for Harassment 1st degree, shop lifting, trespassing, aggravated unlicensed operation and impersonation. Although they are low key misdemeanors, I'm indeed no super great, sensitive Saint. I've just been more emotionally aware and sensitive to people....now after my Dx... I wasn't a total *** before, but Def not the way I am now.

Yes I have many good traits, but I try to be honest with people.....I have many bad traits as well. I'm telling you all this, because while I could just let everyone think I am this super nice guy with MS....I am not... Sure I am nice, but not a super saint as some of you nice people think I've just been in tune with human nature more than I ever had these days....before the Dx I probably wouldn't of been so sensitive of hearing the news that girl told me, but it did bother me....made me feel so bad.

It just shows me how random life really is and we are all at he mercy of nature and how well we can survive the time we have alive. Some just get screwed and it's over in a blink for them, while others still ride bicycles at 90 years old. With that said I am going to ask how she is doing next time I see her there. I had a stranger ask me how I am doing after they had seen me in a not so good time, and it made me feel real good.

[TXBatman]

I still think back about getting the first hint that I might have MS from the first brain MRI I had. I knew there was something unusual about the MRI results, but couldn't get anybody at the doctor's office to tell me what it was. Finally the doctor called me that night and said there was no sign of tumors, but the possibility of MS. It sounds so wierd looking back on it, but my first reaction was relief. Relief that I didn't have cancer and wasn't going to get a "you have X months to live" Dx. Then I had to think "what is MS?...is that like Jerry's kids or something?"

Lets just say that I have become much more aware of other diseases and compassionate towards everybody over the nine years or so since that happened. But even with all of the knowledge I have gained, one thing still stands out...relief. Maybe it is self-delusion done to make me feel better...but I find myself relieved that I don't have something terminal or untreatable. Yes, MS sucks and there is no cure and it will progress...but at least for me, it hasn't progressed much, and if I had to be afflicted with something, it sure beats incurable cancer or something like that.

All you can do Eric is give thanks for the things you do have in life and be compassionate to those who are less fortunate.

[ginnie]

I think being here on NT with all of us together is an eye opening experience. All of us have compassion toward each other, and that is what makes it special. No matter what our conditions are, there are friends to help you through. Being here and listening to all of you has made me a better person. ginnie

[SallyC]

Momma Sally is just so proud of you all.