[Erin524]

I had a really bad, and very silent UTI over the past month. The MS symptoms just kept getting worse and worse, so I went to my regular doctor (who no longer takes my insurance because my insurance company, the largest insurance co in the state, refuses to work with the largest healthcare provider in the state anymore)

I'm in the middle of a massive flare. My walking has been getting steadily worse, daily, for the past several weeks. I'm afraid to call the neuro to ask for steroids, because he's refused them before.

I'm afraid to use my insurance for anything because I keep getting bills that are $500+ for one visit. I'm scared to switch to a new doctor, because they wouldn't know me.

I'd switch insurance, but I'm scared to do that too. Afraid the law will get changed, and the law about pre-existing conditions will change again, and I'll end up on government healthcare, which I'm hearing from relatives in the medical profession is even worse than what I have.

Don't think I'm going to make it to Christmas. I finished my antibiotics, and can tell the UTI is better, but it pushed me into a really big flare. I don't think I'll recover from this one. Not only is Christmas going to be ruined for me. I think the rest of my life is ruined.

It's been the worst year. I've been feeling worse and worse all year. Boyfriend dumped me because of the MS (at least that's what it felt like the reason for that was). Now I think I'm getting so bad that I'm going to end up making us either move to a new house, or I'll have to have some fairly intricate modifications made to the house. (I live in a basement)

My holiday is ruined, and I'm going to get blamed for ruining other family members Christmas. (people who don't live here, who think that I'm faking the MS. Kind of hard to fake neurological symptoms)

really starting to hate christmas almost as much as I hate the MS. Because the MS is ruining everything I do, or want to do.