Okay I have gone up 10lbs in a single month, even though I was playing with the GB and doing more than I should have (who can resist...) I have never in my life put on so much weight at one time... Lost it, easily... never gained it.

My skin is all but crawling off my body it seems. My Copaxone injections are acting like major wasp stings now. I'm narcoleptic throughout the day and an insomniac throughout the night.

I'm in pain, but there's nothing the doctors can do for it as I'm at the end of the line for pharmaceutical treatments. I'm so tired of being allergic to everything that could be potentially beneficial and honestly I'm just sooooo tired.

It's been over a year since I quit smoking but I would gladly hop on my wheelchair and push myself all the way to the nearest store for a pack of smokes (except I know the DH would kill me if I did... too bad it would only be in the figurative sense and not the literal )

And if it wasn't for all the drugs I'm currently taking I would have gladly sang my woes in the bottom of a bottle of Jamieson rather than airing them out on the boards. Such a shame they can't make alcohol friendly muscle relaxants.

I want to go for a run, so much it's practically kill me. I want to run even more than I want a cigarette. I want to do some sit-ups, go for nice hard swim, jump a rope, hop around on a pogo stick, something! Anything other than sitting in my computer chair, or sitting on the couch, or sitting on the bed... sitting... sitting...sitting...

I want to clean my house!
I want to go to the park with my grandbaby and show her how to play on the monkey bars.
I want to bake cookies without fearing I'm going to drop them or fall into the oven.
I want to brush my hair without getting a knot in my shoulder after a few swipes of the brush.
I want to French braid my hair!
I want to go grocery shopping, standing on my own two legs, tapping my foot because the lady in front of me is trying to use expired coupons and counting out pennies.
I want to climb a tree.
Swing on tire swing
Build a playhouse
To not treat my DH like he's a computer and I just need to point and click to get things done.

I want to ** my whiny little head to tell it to shut up and deal with it, life sucks, get used to it and no amount of whining, crying or wishing is going to change it.

I want my sense of humor back!!!!!!!

I am not amused either. I am 24/7 in a wheelchair but lucky enough to afford house-cleaners. Last crew was to a point to know where things are and do what needs doing. Of course got a whole new crew now that need guidance. Young too. I'd rather clean myself. But thing is there's always a worse story out there. At least I don't have to clean their houses!!! Sometimes I have to make myself realize it may be a half an inch of water and not to think I'm gonna drown. MS does suck and steals life away from us. When I was first diagnosed and cried on phone after with my GP she said "You have a right to cry." We do.

You know I needed to write that for myself, not you? Having a bad day.

That's the only thing I have left!

Now Sally - SHE amuses me.

it is safe here starz. you won't hurt, or gain weight.
you can eat chocolate covered peeps and fight demons with a new laser sword from star wars.

we can also give great

back to reality. sounds like you should check with your dr about the copaxone. if you're getting these large reactions it might progress to a full blown allergic reaction; not good.

let us know how you are.

I can see your sense of humour in what you wrote. You haven't lost it yet. It's ok not to have a good day or a bunch of them back to back.

Everyday I have to climb 5 fights of stairs just to move my car. And believe me that is a struggle.

I can't imagine a single flight of stairs let alone FIVE!

You are my hero!

Which undoubtedly explains the 10lbs in a month... I mean I used to know what five flights of stairs were, would rather walk up the 17 flights of stairs than hop in the elevator (smelly smelly people... It's a drop of perfume folks, not a whole bottle )

I know it's incredibly unhealthy, and probably the last thing in the world I need to do, but I'm ready to stock up on slimfasts. Last thing my poor joints need is being crushed under the mass that is becoming my body It feels like I can't wear my white sweatshirt lest child running screaming from me, afraid the Stay-Puff Marshmellowman is cross dressing and coming after them.

Alright I guess some of the sense of humor is returning, though I still might go to SAMs club and get the Opera size slimfast pack.

I can relate.

Seems the simplest tasks are becoming exhausting. Things I used to do in one hour take half a day (do for 5 minutes.....rest for 20 ).

One thing I'd like to do again is just go somewhere alone. Not that I don't love and appreciate all that my family does for me but I just want to go to the grocery store and not feel like someone is standing behind me waiting (because they ARE!).

And I want to be able to walk up and down each aisle looking at everything. I can't do that anymore because my legs are screaming after about 30 minutes. Doesn't anybody hear it but me??

Whenever I'm feeling less than adequate for whatever I have going on during a particular day I tend to whine about things like my non-existent balance.....my left leg that won't cooperate on any type of flooring but laminate or linoleum......the fact that I can't go without shoes in public.

I do know that I'm thankful for all that I can still do.....and for my awesome family that won't leave me alone no matter what. There are just some days that nothing can bring me out of my funk.......except maybe a piece of Dove chocolate and a good cry. Afterwards I'm good to go!

I totally forgot about going out alone. Just driving around really, radio blasting to the songs I wanna hear... Not just what "the driver" will tolerate. Picking up what I want from the grocery without getting another's two cents about it. (Mom has to point out all the generics, and coupons and do all the math to ensure I'm not paying 1/30th of a penny more per pound on my pasta... DH has to ask if I really want that or wouldn't I rather have whatever it is he wants... But I can get it... If I really want it...)