Boy, you speakum good truth, squaw. I never forget for one minute what I've been stripped of. It somehow fuels the good anger in me and boosts my determination. Yet, at the same time, it has me shaking an angry fist at God as I demand help to keep going.

People often tell me the that they see in me the qualities you mentioned, but it's not all that true. I'm just a good liar.

You reckon? I dunno. I think it's just easy to put my game face on -- whether it's on this board, or the few hours of seeing friends and loved ones in real space, or talking on the phone. The habit of a lifetime, I guess. I still get angry at times, but it's usually not global anger, just anger and frustration with a particular moment. I think I'm just too restless and curious to stay angry and depressed for long. But anger can be good, as you say. It has a way of kicking my butt and getting me moving.

I don't believe in God, so I've never expected help from that quarter. I believe in love, though. I don't mean romantic love alone, but love in general. Agape. As other things get stripped away, love remains.

Chris