I started this with four animals: a horse, two dogs, and a cat. In the last two and a half years, all four have died. I've had animals all my life. I learned the grief of the finality of the death of a friend early; animals' lives are short and death is the sad part of living with them. I've had many animals die. But the intensity of my grief at the passing of these four friends took me by surprise.

Once I had gone through boxes of tissues and the first intensity of my sorrow had been watered with many tears, I realized I had never before lost an animal without the expectation of getting another to fill the void. Nothing can take the place of a loved one. But another animal helped me to move on from my grief, kept me from getting stuck in the sadness. That's not the case now.

It's the end of an era, and a part of me has died with them.

Chris