Oh , Sheena,

please come back on and talk to us.

Sheena, if you are not abusing or neglecting your child (not getting your child medical care, not providing food, a clean place to sleep, making sure your child bathes and stays appropriately clean for her/his age, getting your kid to school, etc), then you really should consider keeping your child.

Life isn't a rose garden for anyone. Or then maybe it is, lots of thorns. Lots and lots of thorns. Your child WILL learn to adapt to your illness.

Your child will never forget that mommy gave her away. If you are abusing her or neglecting her, she will learn to understand that by giving her away you protected and loved her. But if you are not, I believe the scars would be very deep and life lasting.

No child has a rose garden without thorns.

To help you through this decision call your PCP's office and ask for a referral to a counselor that deals with children and parents AND can provide a sliding scale fee (if you need this).

As far as the TY, all I can suggest is that you open communication with the neuro you like. This is probably something you do need to do.

I sent some kneemail up for you.

Peace.

We are here for you. I have no experience with Ty. But my thoughts and prayers are with you. There are a lot of people here much smarter than me. They have helped me more than most of them know. Keep talking to all these folks. Tell us about your child. You need someone to talk to who cares.... and WE ALL CARE!

my prayers go out to you in this time of need, dont make any decision in haste, I raised two boys as a sloe parent, and it was hell but would never trade it for anything in the world, and I agree finding the right meds and docs, then u should be able to do it, you and your child, as a team.

as for the doc pushing u to try this med and not helping when u get sick on it, that ***** dont fly with me. that doc would have his ears chewed off, is this a normal thing with this type of med? I also am not familiar with this med, sorry, nor does that seem like a normal way of a doc handling things

but that doc would be on my short list of get new docs list

again try not to despair beyond reasonable thinking and do not make any hasty decisions, this is a decision you will have to live with for a long time.

You might use the phone book and start calling the help line numbers- usually in the front of the book.
Look for government agencies, churches, food banks, charities

South Carolina family services
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...=Google+Search
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search

North Carolina family services
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...es&btnG=Search

Thank you for helping. I know I'm a much better parent then her father. He is what one calls a dead beat. Hasn't wked since 2001... A mothers boy and has now put mother above his child. He refused his last weekend, most of Easter and I'm told will not be taking her on his next either. Usually that would be great, but I need the time off to get better.

I'm taking care of her basic needs, but much of nothing more since I got sick. I think it is the sick deal that is making me even consider giving her up, but I've changed my mind. She will stay with me. I am so tired all the time and I can't sleep. Major problem. No the stupid neuro will not give pills. I'm switching on the 15th.

Yes, I have emily lined up to see a psycoanalist (sp) I did this a few days ago. I looked for help a long time back but none in this area so forget that. We don't even have a big sister program and zip for help around the house...

I think I'll be ok now. I needed to vent hear some real people with real advice.

Thank You So Much

Sheena

I'm so glad you posted an update. Please don't make a kneejerk decision on the spur of the moment that will be difficult to reverse.

How old is your daughter? Can anyone at school help - maybe they know of some programs in your area that can assist?

Some days I feel so bad and hurt so much that I think I can't do anything but lie on the couch. 24 hours later I'm fine. That's the nature of this beast....

Be honest with your daughter - give her the chance to help you. She will learn responsibility and compassion.

I hope today is a better day. We're all here for you.....

Sheena - Thank you so much for updating us. I am glad things settled down a bit for you.

You will be fine. Give yourself some time to work things out.

As HK said, some days are really bad and others are really good.

I'm also glad you will be going to a new neuro. Hopefully he/she will be able to get you on the right track so that you can feel better.

No problem on the venting. We are here to help you.

Sheena, I was thinking about this after I posted this morning and thought of some things that might be helpful to you as you don't have the resources around you to help. (Here I go with a list again. LOL)

1. Keep easy prep meals on hand for your "down" times. I always have those on hand for when DDs have to cook. Sometimes they are pre-packaged things like orange chicken and easy prep rice that you just put in the microwave. Sometimes when I cook, I cook larger meals and freeze the rest for these days. I'll make a large pot of chili and what we don't eat I freeze in single size portions.

2. Take advantage of places that deliver food, meds, and other necessities. If your local grocery does not deliver food Amazon has a whole grocery section. I know that it may cost a little for shipping but the prices are close to what they are in the store and you save some energy.

There are other sites that deliver things like tp, shampoo, toothpaste, etc. I have found these to be a little bit cheaper than what is in the store.

You can also have your meds delivered.

Generally, I don't do this as DDs can drive.

3. Teach DD how to cook simple things. When DDs were about your DDs age I taught them how to make simple things so that when they were at their dad's I knew that they would be able to fix themselves something to eat. I even taught them how to use the stove and cook eggs.

4. Try to spend 10 minutes or less a day "straightening" up the house. Make a game of it with DD. Again DDs are older, but every evening before bed we straighten up and wipe the counters down. It takes all of 5 minutes but it makes a huge difference over all. Things don't get out of hand and overwhelming.

5. Take 5 to 10 minutes everyday to come on here for support. (I just had to throw that in there. LOL)

Anyone else have some time and energy saving tips for Sheena?