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-   -   I am so stressed over this but probably shouldn't be (https://www.neurotalk.org/multiple-sclerosis/48351-am-stressed-probably-shouldnt.html)

gamgam 06-21-2008 08:18 AM

I am way too opinioned and I know it but I have to say something about how you were treated.

First, I want to tell you what a wonderful people you and your husband are. To give a loving home to children that would otherwise grow up in state home with out the personal love and attention that you are providing says so much about you. I resent that this Dr verbally abused you as he did. He had no right at all to treat you like he did.

Sometimes we are so shocked that we were treated the way we were that we do not respond promptly. It sounds like that is what happened to you. If he was having that bad a day, he should have rescheduled his patients and carried his ***** home for the rest of the day!

I was wondering why you need this guy anyway. If the MS Dr knows the treatment she would order, couldn't she work with your local Internal Medicine Dr if you needed to be treated with steroids? I know that is what I have arranged with the MS specialist that I go to in Atlanta. I do not see a local Neuro because they really did not think I had MS and would not review all that was going on with me when I was sent to them so my Internal Med Dr sent me to Atlanta to a MS Clinic and its about 1 1/2 hrs from us and I go there ever 6 months unless there is something going on then I am seen more often.

Ask your local Medical Dr if they are willing to work with the MS Specialist. I hate to think of you ever having to go back to that Dr. I know it sounds like I am taking this personal and maybe I am. I am just so tired of people getting mistreated by the medical community.

I certainly hope you will go to the rating site and give us a heads up on this dr so others can stay away from him if they are given a choice. The site is www.msneuroratings.com

Take care and again I say thank you for opening your home and heart to those precious children.

Dejibo 06-21-2008 09:46 AM

Thank you Thank you Thank you for that link!

I immediately went and posted about 2 neuros i have dealt with. This is awesome! I will add a book mark to be able to go back there.

:hug:

SallyC 06-21-2008 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gamgam (Post 306247)
I certainly hope you will go to the rating site and give us a heads up on this dr so others can stay away from him if they are given a choice. The site is www.msneuroratings.com

This is Andrea/Spooky's site, that I mentioned in another thread, but didn't have the link. Thanks Gam for providing the link..:cool:

momXseven 06-21-2008 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dejibo (Post 306234)
As a nurse, let me tell you, this jerk was making judgements about you.

he was thinking you were NUTS for having 7 kids on purpose. That you were probably just seeking SSDI or some other sort of "hand out" (their opinion not mine) That you were a sympathy seeker, and doctor shopping until you found the one that you could force to agree to YOUR diagnosis.




That's what I was thinking also.
I get ALL kinds of "looks and questions" from Dr.'s about having 7 kids, even if they were planed from Dr.'s that are NOT my OBGYN's and if I'm "happy" with having all of them. :rolleyes: Most of them just tell me that having so many is too much stress for me. :eek:

ewizabeth 06-21-2008 01:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slskckjebw (Post 305723)
There are so many children who need families and not enough families willing to take them.

I didn't know I had MS before we adopted our children. If I had we probably would not have taken on such a challenge. Four of our adopted children have Down syndrome.

I am grateful we have our family. The future is kind of scary but things will be ok.....ok enough venting.

Thanks for the support! :hug:

LA:

God bless you Sweetie! Your kids are so lucky to have you and vice-versa! :hug: BTW, that doctor sounds like a dandy. :plain: JMHO

Becky21 06-21-2008 08:56 PM

LA,

I still get angry thinking about that doctor asking you why you have so many kids.:mad:

You and hubby are so amazing to have all your babies and take little children who need love as your own.:) It's just wonderful and I know you love them as much as they love you.:)

The stress factor seems to play such a big role when doctor's don't know what is wrong with us. I had it from several Neuro's and one Cardio and a couple of PCP's over my long adventure with MS. They just don't want to admit they don't know so they make us question our sanity.

Thankfully, I now have a Neuro, PCP and Cardiologist that I trust completely. If I don't like a doctor, I move on the the next and it eventually works out.

Hang in there and you will find a good doctor. Just keep looking and don't settle if you can't feel comfortable and communicate.:hug:

NurseNancy 06-21-2008 09:23 PM

that dr has no bedside manner. and no manners at all.

it is possible that a 2nd visit will be better. at least he knows you have MS.
on the other hand the idea of your current dr working with your pcp is a good idea.

Down Syndrome children are so open and loving.
you must have a wonderful family.
blessings to you.

slskckjebw 06-21-2008 09:34 PM

Oh thank you. I want to respond back to your post but have had a crazy long day and will be back on the board tomorrow.

LA

Quote:

Originally Posted by gamgam (Post 306247)
I am way too opinioned and I know it but I have to say something about how you were treated.

First, I want to tell you what a wonderful people you and your husband are. To give a loving home to children that would otherwise grow up in state home with out the personal love and attention that you are providing says so much about you. I resent that this Dr verbally abused you as he did. He had no right at all to treat you like he did.

Sometimes we are so shocked that we were treated the way we were that we do not respond promptly. It sounds like that is what happened to you. If he was having that bad a day, he should have rescheduled his patients and carried his ***** home for the rest of the day!

I was wondering why you need this guy anyway. If the MS Dr knows the treatment she would order, couldn't she work with your local Internal Medicine Dr if you needed to be treated with steroids? I know that is what I have arranged with the MS specialist that I go to in Atlanta. I do not see a local Neuro because they really did not think I had MS and would not review all that was going on with me when I was sent to them so my Internal Med Dr sent me to Atlanta to a MS Clinic and its about 1 1/2 hrs from us and I go there ever 6 months unless there is something going on then I am seen more often.

Ask your local Medical Dr if they are willing to work with the MS Specialist. I hate to think of you ever having to go back to that Dr. I know it sounds like I am taking this personal and maybe I am. I am just so tired of people getting mistreated by the medical community.

I certainly hope you will go to the rating site and give us a heads up on this dr so others can stay away from him if they are given a choice. The site is www.msneuroratings.com

Take care and again I say thank you for opening your home and heart to those precious children.


lady_express_44 06-22-2008 10:29 AM

He's obviously got some biases, which have nothing to do with compassion or empathy, but I can guess "why" he was acting the way he was.

He's probably one of those guys that doesn't give out a dx unless the person has 50 lesions, 9 O-bands, and is in a wheelchair . . .

He wanted to know why you weren't going back to the other doctor, probably because he wanted to see if you were out doctor-shopping for a dx. Your dx is not a slam-dunk in his opinion, although in the end he agreed it was at LEAST CIS.

I don't think his comments about having 7 kids had much to do with this . . . he just hates kids (women, dogs, and old people) and can't understand how anyone else could like them that much. :D

My neuro has a morbid curiosity about depression with MS. Every time I go in there, she hands me this 5 page questionnaire about "how I'm feeling". She never tells me what my answers indicated to her . . . but she doesn't offer antidepressants either so I guess I'm doing ok in that department.

I think the important thing, when dealing with any doc, is to find one who knows what they are talking about when YOU ask the questions. Otherwise, I just look at them a social misfits in life, and ignore their many quirks. :p

I wouldn't take it too personally, LA.

Cherie

slskckjebw 06-22-2008 12:31 PM

[QUOTE=lady_express_44;306841]He's obviously got some biases, which have nothing to do with compassion or empathy, but I can guess "why" he was acting the way he was.

He's probably one of those guys that doesn't give out a dx unless the person has 50 lesions, 9 O-bands, and is in a wheelchair . . .
He was so stuck on the LP. But then decided I didn't need an LP because it would not change the treatment of Avonex and my other medications because he was certain that I had at least CIS. At the end of the appointment I directly asked him what he thought I had and he said "MS" so he must have seen something in my exam or the information in my chart was starting to sink in for him. But he couldn't keep himself from commenting that sometimes our sensory symptoms are not as bad as we think they are. Maybe he would like to run around with ON for a few days and see how he feels it affects HIS life.
He wanted to know why you weren't going back to the other doctor, probably because he wanted to see if you were out doctor-shopping for a dx. Your dx is not a slam-dunk in his opinion, although in the end he agreed it was at LEAST CIS.
(I wasn't sure what to say to that question. I thought I had made it very clear to him up front that I was there to coordinated care with my MS specialist, not for another opinion or to be grilled.

I don't think his comments about having 7 kids had much to do with this . . . he just hates kids (women, dogs, and old people) and can't understand how anyone else could like them that much. :D
You are probably correct! He was not the friendliest guy around that is for sure.

My neuro has a morbid curiosity about depression with MS. Every time I go in there, she hands me this 5 page questionnaire about "how I'm feeling". She never tells me what my answers indicated to her . . . but she doesn't offer antidepressants either so I guess I'm doing ok in that department.
Sometimes those none answers are worse than if they would just give their opinion. At least an opinion would let you know where you stand.

I think the important thing, when dealing with any doc, is to find one who knows what they are talking about when YOU ask the questions. Otherwise, I just look at them a social misfits in life, and ignore their many quirks. :p

I wouldn't take it too personally, LA.
I go to my MS doctor next week. I called to let her know what happened. I would be ok if I could just skip the local neuro and go to my PCP. I am going to see if that might be an option.

He would say something to me and then look at my chart and go OH. It would have been much easier for him and for me if had maybe looked at the chart before he opened his mouth.


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