Joelle,

I am happy that you are home and sorry that you had such a horrible experience. Being single, your experience makes me realize that I really do need a proxy or two.

Sandy, do you have to legally establish individuals as your proxy?

If you do it in the hospital, yes. The forms you fill out are legally bound through the hospital. Your doctor should have the forms in the office as well. No lawyer needed.

However, since we own a house we did go ahead and hire a lawyer to do our wills. We had a will, living will and power of attorney drawn up. It was very reasonable cost wise. We paid $250 for both of us total and they don't expire unless we change them.

For us, we wanted to make sure no one could argue over who was in charge or what they get and if they can make decisions for us. We knew exactly who we wanted and how things were to be divided. Basically our kids get everything and no one can fight that. Our health care is to be decided by both of us if one is unable to and if we are both unable, the kids choose.

We don't have much so the lawyer said she sees no reason a probate judge would argue with our will if Jim and I go together.

In my state you MUST have a signed form, notorized and so forth appointing someone your healthcare proxy person while you are ill or injured that can make decisions for you. Once you get a settled routine going with a hospital or provider, they get to know pretty quickly that you are not going to do a thing unless your proxy is with you. They ALWAYS ask "where is Frank?" when I go alone. If on a rare occasion he is not with me, they always ask "is it ok with you, if we talk without him being here?" So, they have gotten used to us here.

Its always good to have an official decision BEFORE you are sick.

This is a smart thing to do. I just updated my will, POA and living will. It cost about $300 but it was money well spent. There's no question about who will get what (my kids get everything) and also no question about my wishes should I be unable to convey them myself.

We all feel better knowing that it's taken care of and in writing.

P.S. Don't forget about your checking account(s). Make sure you have a P.O.D. form signed at your bank(s) so your kids can access your money should something happen to you.

hi joelle,

i would believe anything you said about hospitals as i've had some absolutely terrible experiences when each of my parents were hospitalized in FL.

i would document it in writing while it's fresh in your mind.
it sounds like all your "docs" and "nurses" were worthless. definitely substandard care.

investigate hosps in your area so when you ever need one you can pick a better one. and screw where your dr goes. most docs don't make hospital rounds anyway. they transfer care.

That's right. When Jim was hospitalized we expected his spinal cord doctor to be his admitting doctor. We were wrong, it was the on call doctor. It was a pain in the butt but we just did our time and got out as fast as we could. LOL

I'm sorry for all you went through at that hospital Joelle. I hope you'll feel better soon.

Wow! What a nightmare for you, dear Joellelee! I'm so very sorry for your terrible experience. I hope you find a good replacement doc.

Erin

My neuro told me i had retrobular neuritis very much like optic neuritis but behind the optic nerve therefore does not show on the MRI.

Good luck to all

laurie f

Joelle sorry for what you went thru. Hope you are feeling better.