Hi Everyone, sorry I havent been able to check in lately, had been sooo tired with all thats happening.

Dad was admitted twice to hospital this week, first for his breathlessness and dehydration, second for his stent procedure. As you all may have known, my dad has oesophaegus cancer stage 4, which makes it hard for food to go down. He has lost more than 20kg since diagnosis in 2007, and 10kg in the past mth alone. He was dehydrated as he couldn't take in water, once he drank, he vomitted. It was weird as he could take solid food (like biscuits) but once he took a sip of water, out everything would come. So we had to send him in on Friday as he had not taken water for 2 days. We spent 6 hours in the ER that day, and 3 hours in the ward, before leaving at ard midnight to rest. Drs could only put him on a drip, hydrate him, then send him home till his stent procedure scheduled on wed. He was admitted on tuesday, and right after the stent procedure, he vomitted the whole day. Till today, he's still vomitting. Pains me to see him going through all these..

As for myself, I'm glad to say that my best friend whisked me away for a short 2D2N trip to a nearby island, where we simply relaxed, had spa and messages on Sunday. Lol. ITs the best birthday present I've got this year. Thankfully dad was discharged before we left, and we made it back on my birthday, the day dad was admitted to hospital for the stent.

Was also busy the past 3 days helping to appeal for blood donors for my friend's close friends, one of whom has leukaemia (the poor guy's only in his 20s), while the other lady (35 yrs old) was in a coma after an op to remove a blood clot. Some people responded, while some were skeptical. Thankfully we managed to find enough donors for the boy while the lady who was in a coma, sad to say, doctors found a 2nd blood clot yesterday afternoon, her condition deteriorated, and we received news today that she has been declared brain dead. Everyday we have people fighting for their lives, and this makes me even more determined not to let ALS rule my life. Its just something that I have, but it doesnt have me. =)

My condition however, hasn't been too good. Have to walk with a cane now, and its getting more difficult sometimes. Wake up feeling like I haven't slept, and not to mention the fascics and cramps that come with it. Am already on the maximum dosage for clonazepam for the cramps and pain, but it only lessens the pain, doesn't stop the cramps. Muscles have turned to "vibrating" from "twitching" and its really uncomfortable. Its like my legs don't ever rest. My left eye muscle has also been jumping for hours each day, making it difficult to read sometimes. My wrist is becoming smaller now, and its becoming straighter, like the meat's disappearing. Its extremely obvious, and friends have been commenting that I look like a stick. Lol. My tongue has this nerve that almost always cramps up, making my tongue stick to the right, elevated. Weird.

Its funny how I still have the strength, but yet sometimes, I feel floppy. I hate wearing elastic pants now. Lol. Its just so difficult getting them on, somehow. Just today, during dinner, I felt so breathless I didn't know why. Was really hungry but yet chest was so heavy that I just couldn't eat. Does anyone know what could be wrong? It happened yesterday evening as well, and I felt sooo giddy I had to sit down.

I still miss everyone, and am reading the posts to see what everyone has been up to. However I may have missed some, and forgive me if I'm asking again here.

Rach: How's the dx process going? Did they give you a dx? Are they treating u well? I'm so glad to hear from u on fb! Lol.

Erin: I'm glad the IVIG's working for you. My neuro's also suggesting it, though am not sure if I should take it. Hope the nurses treat u nice, and that your symptoms start going away!!!! HAve they confirmed the fibro dx? Is there anythng they can give u to make it better?

Pat: How are you now after the visit to the hospital? Is everthing under control? What happened for it to occur suddenly?

Shar: Thanks for the update!!!! Its so good to hear from u again.

Simon: How have u been? I can't seeem to catch ur posts. Lol.. Are u around?

Joanmarie: How are you now? Better after taking the meds?

Rezmommy: How are the cramps? BetteR???

Nicky: Have u started radiation? Is it tough on you? Sending u lots of love and strength from here!

scarpettafan and bluesky: Sorry to hear of your dx... But stay positive, and I'm sure things will start looking up soon! Most impt thing is think of positive thoughts!

Annie: how are u? Heard that u've been feeling tired recently, why is this so? Are you better nowwW? *hugssss*

The new people: Hello! Welcome! This is a great place, and like me, you'll grow to love these people so much. Lol. They're in my thoughts every single day.

I miss all of you badly, and I hate not being able to keep up with everything. I'm sorry I can't type more, hope that this finds all of you well!!!