Welcome Chi-town! Ask us anything, we may have the answer, or maybe not, but we will sure do our best to keep you lifted up!

Thanks Icehouse (and everybody who welcomed me). I guess my first question would be whether anybody has experience with a longer onset situation like what I have (had). It's been a long time and I still get around and function pretty well. I can still play basketball (although I find regular running and now even brisk walking uses the muscles in my lower legs in a different way that often results in cramps).

From what I read, the longer the condition exists, the less likely it is to improve but, the recent motor symptoms have been by far the most troubling so if by stopping now, I can improve that, I guess that would be pretty good. At the end of the day, whether it can improve or not is only part of the equation - I need to stop to try to prevent it from getting worse anyways. So, the answer to whether a longer onset situation can improve really is almost irrelevant other than hope feels better as a motivator than fear ;-)

Thanks again!

Chi-town, I drank moderately (within safe limits) for many years and heavily (well outside safe limits) for about a year.

I developed neuropathy and essential tremor in my hands. I spent about a month as a voluntary patient in a psychiatric hospital, taking the first steps towards dealing with my alcohol abuse as well as my Major Depressive Disorder. My psychiatrist, who is boss of the hospital, prescribed thiamine which I took for about a year. Thiamine deficiency is common in people who abuse alcohol.

That was five years ago - my neuropathy has now largely gone and I still have a bit of essential tremor which does not affect me to any great extent.

Thanks Kiwi. I am taking benfotiamine/thiamine as part of my regimen. I just made an appointment with a highly rated PN clinic (benefits of living in such a large metro area) but will have to wait 6 weeks to get in. I am pretty sure I know the diagnosis but figured it's worth trying to rule out anything else and to get input from a specialty clinic as to what else I can be doing in addition to abstinence and vitamin regimen.

Chi, if you an still play bball then you are ahead of the "game". If you read through all the pages, then you will know that I drank myself into a wheelchair. I have bounced back, but I still can't run (at all) but I can hike, bike, bowl, walk for miles, swim, waterski, etc....I am still to get snow skiing again and I WILL run (or at least jog) again, but I am not very motivated to do so :)

I think your timing is quite good, so do what you need to do!

Thanks Icehouse. I definitely had read your story and was certainly encouraged by it - I'm curious, did things progress negatively for you slowly (years) or more quickly (weeks/months)? Also, did you notice changes in your muscles themselves or did they simply not work properly anymore? It's difficult to describe but I have noticed that the muscles on the outside of my shins both seem taut and somehow larger - first on one leg, now both. Sorry to pepper you with questions but appreciate the feedback. Incidentally, I am drinking a La Croix right now - I saw you keep some bubbly stuff around to distract at times when you might normally reach for a drink.

This just in....
 

Howdy, haven't checked in for a while and catching up on my reading, glad to see you all here in the mutual support thread for those who over-partied. :) I thought I would share the following with you as I am becoming more encouraged that we may see some decent meds in our lifetimes...in my view , the 3 treatments closest to FDA approval (i could be wrong of course, but this is what it looks like to me) are: vm202, ara290, tv1001sr. If interested just put the treatment name in your favorite search engine (google?? I would have never guessed!) and it will take you to lots of good info. What is really exciting about all 3 of these is that they actually have a disease modifying effect and don't just treat symptoms. They actually cause nerves to heal, repair themselves, etc. But don't take my word for it, have fun looking them up, it's really encouraging. Sobriety is great, but wouldn't it be greater to enjoy it without neuropathy?? I think so.

Cheers without Bubbly everyone!!!

Chi, I went downhill over the course of 2.5 years. I spent the last year of that in a wheelchair. I wish I could give you details but I was so clouded by alcohol that I really have very little recollection of those years. It started with mild numbness and a feeling of my legs being asleep, and got slowly worse to the point where I could not walk.

Yet, I continued to drink (and heavily). I look back now and can't fathom the reasoning that went through my head....but it did.

Newstown, thanks for the research (and me losing an hour of my life on Google)!!!

It's almost my birthday (yes yes, thanks, but that's not why I mention it ;) ) turning 54. My dad died (back in 1976) at age 55, fried liver from alcohol. Which explains why for the longest time I didn't want to drink at all, but when it did happen, and I found myself heavily addicted as well, I had this irrational idea that it was inevitable, that I would die at the same age, from the same illness.

The fact that I had seen the devastating effects of his passing, how my mum kept talking about how great a man he was until 15 years later she snapped and let it all out - 15 years hurt, of anger towards a man who had left her behind, together with her 6 kids. The way it upturned my own life. How it forced me to be a 13 year old grown up. How it made my family explode into factions who fought each other tooth and nail.

All this made it all the more inexcusable in my eyes that I fell into the same trap. Which depressed me even more, so down the spiral went.

I snapped out of it - probably just in time - so in 368 days I will be older than my dad (as he died on his birthday). Walking-under-a-bus scenarios aside, I will not die that day, or at least not for the same reason.

Hating the mistakes someone made, and then making the exact same mistakes, I don't know if it makes me plain stupid, a horrible person, or just human. Given that I had promised myself to be kinder to me, I'll tentatively go with human, but the other two options still linger in the back of my mind.

Somehow, I feel like that moment, turning 55 plus 1 day, when I'll also have 5 years sober under my belt, will be a good moment to forgive him. And maybe myself too.

Wide-O, I think a lot of things about you but "plain stupid, a horrible person" are both about minus infinity as far as I am concerned.

For sure you are "just human" and I really admire all that you do here.

Congrats on your up-coming birthday.

I hope that you can forgive your dad and yourself.

However, this is just a thought, maybe acceptance is a more helpful option. I have made many mistakes in my life (not just my alcohol abuse) and for me accepting rather forgiving myself for those mistakes works for me.

As I say, just a thought.