[QUOTE=NTLegend;81567]Melody,

I've tried to figure out why people have dental phobias, and so far I have 2 ideas.

One is what you describe -- something traumatic happens, and then their body tells them (each new time) no, no, no, no, we're not going to do this!

In that case, it's exactly the same as the person who got violently ill from botulism at age 8, by eating a tamale, and at 78 still won't eat a tamale. His body won't let him -- we have an internal system that's rigged to avoid food poisoning.

I think it's rigged to avoid other things, too. Like the person who falls down the stairs, breaks some bones and generally has a bad time of it. Thereafter, stairs are a big problem. Or the person who is in a car accident, and can't make himself drive for a long time afterward.

I would love to find out why (a certain family member on Alan's side of the family), can't go on a bridge, get in a car (she will only ride on buses), she needs to take an atavan if one of her kids flies anywhere, etc. etc. And she is on anti-depressants and sleep meds. (I absolutely never knew this until recently). This person has worked their whole entire life and one would never know by speaking to them that in their youth, they 1, first stopped driving in the nighttime, then 2. Stopped driving completely because of anxiety.

Then they wouldn't go on a bridge, then they wouldnt' get in a car. Now whenever they have to go somewhere in a car, they get anxious and take a pill.

Is this general anxiety? This person was never in a car accident, never had problems going over a bridge, no one in the family was ever in an airplane accident. NOTHING CAUSED THIS EFFECT!!!

I sometimes wonder, (if there is no actual cause for the phobia or anxiety), then WHY are some people so full of fears that they can't get in a car, go over a bridge or have to take a pill when their loved ones fly anywhere. And this person flies places. But they must take an ativan to accomplish this.

My girlfriend told me the other day "melody, do you know how strong an ativan is", I said "isn't it like a xanax?" And she said "don't you watch ER?", whenever a person is brought in agitated in the ER, the first thing out of the mouth of the doctor is 'ATIVAN"".

I think the human mind is very complex and I wish there was an anti-fear pill or some kind of stem cell therapy that would take the "fear gene" out of us all. Man, we would ALL be better off. Not that I want people to take stupid risks or jump off buildings. But just to deal with life better.

Oh well, one can dream. My dream is that they find a way to generate teeth so that everyone can grow as many teeth as they need without resorting to implants, expensive dental procedures and just plain SITTING IN THE DAMM CHAIR!!!

lol Melody

Mel,

I practiced clinical psychology for many years - and saw a lot of folks who sound very much like your family relation. While I would never make a definitive diagnosis on someone who I have never seen, I will offer an opinion.

She sounds like she suffers from a classic case of agoraphobia. There seems to be a lot of misinformation about this perplexing and usually vexing (for the person afflicted) disorder. Agoraphobia literally means fear of open spaces, but that is hardly ever the exact symptom manifested in this condition. And while it has a phobic component, it is not a phobia in the way that we normally think of a phobia as it does not involve the fear of a discrete object.

So agoraphobia can best be described as a combination of severe anxiety, with phobic elements, and repetitive avoidant behavior. Agoraphobia usually starts when a person experiences anxiety and then it recurs in the same situation. After awhile, the individual becomes afraid or "phobic" of the anxiety returning so they start the avoiding places they fear could trigger it. For some, the avoidant behavior becomes so generalized and strong that they end up as virtual shut-ins within their homes.

Many agoraphobics have unresolved conflicts around loss of control (of course, who doesn't - I know I have some - and if I didn't, getting this PN would have created them). The symptoms become an expression of this conflict and the fear of loss of control intensifies - it is kind of a very negative spiral that can truly make life a living nightmare for some.

As with other psychological problems, agoraphobia has a wide range of severity. Most are probably similar to your relative, that is, they manage to work and most people around them are unaware of the problem. But from there, the problem can be moderate or even severe, progressing to complete withdrawal from ordinary life activities.

I hope she is getting adequate help. In some cases, the symptoms prove quite intractable. But fortunately most folks are able to be significantly helped.

rafi