After taking care of EVERYONE else for the past 30 years and putting their needs first, I have made a change. Thank goodness for New Years resolutions ( for once). This coming monday I am headed for the west coast, to have "ME" time. I told my husband I have supported you for the past 20 years and have lived amongst ur family, never getting to see mine. SOOOO... This coming Monday I am headed west and plan to stay til the end of march. Hopefully during this time away we can come to a decision.... Stay married or start over. My employer graciously gave me 12 weeks to decide what I want to do. I am a good nurse and they did not want me to resign so they made it a personal leave. I am so excited to spend time with me!!! Does anyone know the best route from Ohio to California?? I would like to take the lower states... Want to avoid as much snow and ice as possible Hope everyone had a pain free holiday and prayers for a better 2013.

I don't know what routes to drive, but good for you!!!!! I wish you the very best and pray you find all the answers you are looking for.

Have a great time with your family!

Hello KP,

I would suggest getting a good GPS ..I got my Boyfriend a Nice Tom Tom for Christmas and he loves it. I also downloaded MapQuest app on my IPhone and it has helped me out of several tight spots. You will have to go over mountains if you go into Northern CA (I-80) and this time of year its not a good idea. (I-10) Might be a better choice Make sure to pack warm clothes as it gets very cold at night. Also as I recall its been a number of years since I was out that way but there were not many places to stop.

I will say a prayer for a save journey for you and good luck on the start of a new chapter in your life Dawn

No advice, just wishing you the best of luck on your journey. I think it is a wonderful idea and I cannot tell you how often I have wished for extended time by myself in the past 30 years. I have it pretty good, but with raising a husband and five children ( I do not mean that disrespectfully, we've been together since we were 19 so he was not exactly a finished product, we both had neglectful parents so were fixer-uppers!) I have never had time by myself.

Now I feel old, crippled, sick and taken for granted. I want them to see what life would be without me and I would love not being the one to make sure that there is milk in the fridge and clean underwear in their drawers, even if just for a little while. If they managed fine and didn't miss me I woud be good with that, this isn't a plea for attention as much as a reality check. Just why are we together, and can our marriage weather the disability that is coming?

Not meant to be about me, just to say I fully sympathize with your plan and hope it works out beautifully for you!

Sounds like an nice adventure to me!

All I can offer for advice (I am not great with routes or maps),
is to get out of the car often, stretch, walk around some, so you
don't get a blood clot. Some PNs involve autoimmune issues, and and this can affect blood clotting and increase that risk.

I know from myself, that my long trip (8hrs) up and back to our summer place is highly stressful for my legs. So do get enough exercise and also stay very hydrated with water all the time while driving.

I tend to eat smaller but more frequently when driving long distances. I get junior portions at restaurants, and keep Zone Perfect bars for the car for snacks. I always have lots of water, and some Snapple diet for caffeine. (coffee gives me GI upsets).

I also think a marriage vacation can be helpful. For many years, I stayed alone upNorth for 2 weeks and sometimes 1 month periods when my son was younger and could stay with me. Sometimes I'd stay alone, when my son went back to school, and then hubby would come back in a week or 10 days and help me close up.
I found getting a bit of vacation from wifely duties very relaxing and helpful.

It really depends on where you're going in CA. We're a big state! If you're going to SoCal, take the 10 so you don't have to deal with any mountain passes. If you go through Vegas, you have to take the 15, and that is the Cajon pass, which is fine driving as long as the weather is fine. It gets snow, but only when it's really bad. If you take the 80, which takes you to NorCal, then you really want to make sure there is no snow. My bosses went up to Tahoe a couple weeks ago and it took them 9 hours, it should have taken 3. Remember the Donner party! If you say take the 10 through LA and then go North from there, to say the Central Valley or the beach towns in the Central coast, you probably will have to take the 5, which has the Tejon pass, which is bigger than the Cajon pass, but not anything like the 80. I've driven in the snow on that pass and it's so traveled it was fine.

So yeah, it all depends on where you're landing. I can only navigate you through CA, not the other states. AAA is a good resource if you have it (and you should, if you're driving all that way).

Sounds like we are meant to go on a road trip! I feel used and abused, to say the least. I love my children with my entire being. But they are grown now and I see them, maybe a couple of times a month. As far as my husband.... I too ask why? So, before I am no longer able, I am taking this trip now. I am scared but excited. I almost backed out and changed my mind at one point but I think I was just overwhelmed. After a good nights sleep I was good to go. (Literally) I will try to update my status as I travel. Thanks for the well wishes!!

I hope I feel more like working on my marriage after this extended separation. This time is about me and being independent. Not having to take care of others! I am excited. You have given me good travel tips. Most appreciated. Since I am traveling alone I really need to be mindful of taking care of my body!!

A friend of mine hooked me up with a AAA route plan. Funny thing is that I am going to Napa, Oxnard, Santa Ana and San Luis Obispo. Nothing like having friends and family scattered through out the state. I did recall Donner's pass....that was a nightmare. I am from the Midwest and do drive a vehicle with four wheel drive so that is good. Thanks for the advice. Ready for some sunshine, fresh fruit and veggies but most of all, FRESH SEAFOOD!!

Check the weather often no matter how far south you may go thru the states to get to California. It can be very treacherous going thru some states in the southern route depending on what kind of weather they are having. Good luck!