Mrs. D. Wow, that would have never entered my mind. You have no idea how many muffins I have brought to hospitals and shared them with nursing staff, physician assistant's, etc.

And my former primary care doctor, well at Christmas I brought a bottle of non-alcoholic wine. They appreciated that. I also made fat free brownies. They scooped them up. Now this is a very small practice. No big hospital setting here.

I never ever thought that nurses might think this is a control issue. In this doctor's office, whenever I was there, patients would be bringing in boxes of donuts, dropping them off, shaking the doc's hand, and scooting out the door. That always amazed me. Sometimes they would drop off bagels.

The office staff was extremely friendly and always appreciative. Of course, it didn't hurt that one of the office staff lived around the corner from me, or that the nurse Annie, loved when I taped shows for her on Turner Classic Movies. It was a very relaxed office. I guess it's different in a hospital setting.

So far I guess I've been lucky.

The only place I have never brought anything is to my dentist in NYC because he has a fridge packed with fresh juices and fresh fruit (right in the waiting room), Then there's a table with a big coffee making thing that you take a coffee pod and you make your own flavored coffees and teas. There are plates of fresh muffins. Never saw such an office waiting room in all my life.

You should have seen me the first time I went there (my inlaws had shown up for moral support), and there in the waiting room was Alan, my sister in law and my brother in law drinking gourmet coffee, teas and fruit. They were having a ball and I was scared out of my mind. But he's a phobia guy and treated me very well.

They could have left me in that chair the whole day, they were eating Very Well!!!! LOL

I will remember (fur future reference) what you said about bringing food and that the nurses might see it as a control thing. That never would have crossed my mind.

Thanks for this info.

Melody

I always fix a littls candy bar basket for the staff in my room and
like Billye i felt like i got better care. i have done this for years
and plan on keep on doing it. I'm known as the candy lady. Sue

That the staff regards gifts/food/ parties, flowers as bribes, and evaluate the giver negatively.I find this remark ridiculous. I think it would depend on the giver, at any rate. We have a wonderful person, she is always bubbly, happy go lucky and she brings in cookies for the staff in gratitude for our kindness. I do feel it is not necessary, a thank you is all I need. Some of the staff grows to expect treats and I feel that is wrong too. When a person makes an appointment, they will say, "Mrs......... is coming in next week and she always brings goodies." Maybe I would feel differently if the goodies were ever anything I could have, yet I doubt it. Being courtious to the person helping you out is all I ask. Just as when I go to another doc office, I treat them as I want to be treated.

I found a credit card in the parking lot one day and did my best to find the person's phone#. When she came in to get the card, she brought me a small plant and that was really nice, but certainly not necessary. It's sad in this world that people feel it's a bribe, some kind of trick when another is kind.

Those in control of the clinics... are the ones who view this generous behavior as negative. The lower nurses, they are not in control of your case, so they probably appreciate something. Remember, drug reps have started this habit, of bribing doctors to prescribe. I think this plays into their feelings as well.

Its never nice listening to doctors like I did, complain about their patients.
How those patients "abuse" them, call them at all hours, demand pain meds...I heard it all. It was not nice. But that is what is going on behind the patients' backs!

When I had my son, and was in the hospital for 6 days, I bought goodies for the nurses, when I LEFT... that type of gift is a gift, since you are not hinting at a future payoff. Many people do this... and I think that is different upon discharge.

My son was injured less than a year ago, and spent months
in hospitals, and we always brought him goodies.
(He still is in a manged care facility)
He would often share these with the staff that helped him,
and they appreciated it. It wasn't a gift from us to them,
just an invitation to share- with him.
I think that they kinda give him a little bit of extra attention because of it.

I forgot to mention in my post about the small bags of candy. I always opened them and kept a few pieces and then gave them to the staff, tellling them that I didn't need all the pounds, (the truth) and would they please share the bag among themselves. AND...when I went home from the hospital, I took time to write a nice thank you note to the nursing staff and one to the phy therapy dept telling them how much I appreciated their care of me while I was there. AND...I took the time in the form of a short letter to express my graditude to the young emergency room doctor for his correct diagnosis of the fractures. I told him we were extremely lucky to have a doctor of his caliber in this small town. And I do feel that way.

Billye

I'm on the side of the goodies, but not going overboard with them. More than that, if a nurse or receptionist treats you particularly well, a thank you note to the DOCTOR, commending his nurse, means a huge amount.

A good thank you note is also quite sufficient and really appreciated.

Does it depend on the circumstances or the office or hospital situation?
The times I've brought gifts of food and the like it's always been readily at times greedily received...So I thought. Now does that mean I have to re-think how I can show simple appreciation for a good support staff? Not just the docs but the staff that are the ones that often times are the ones making the doc more accessabile and any billing/records/appointment issues soo much easier? Those staff people are MY heroes at times, often important times...How can I be PC and thank them appropriately? IF not food, How then? I mean, it's OK for drug reps to come to offices and 'bring lunch' for the whole office...we certainly can't do that.....nor should that be solicitated of patients...but...

I really want to show appreciation, as does Kmeb, to the folks, all the right folks who really do GOOD by/to us, the patients. Any and all perspectives/input is really appreciated! I for one, feel more confused now than before! Is it a hospital, therapy, testing, professional office/site thing that determines the protocol? - j

kmeb I was wondering the same exact thing as I am also in the middle of a SSDI case I was going to send my rheumy a thank you card for Father's Day, maybe I will wait till after the fact as see if he really helps! My pysch doc has already agreed to fill out papers with me together at our next appt....she works out of a huge beautiful home on a river...she is one of a kind...but i was thinking maybe best to do the card thing, and or depending on your relationship with the office and staff go from your heart. I don't want to appear bribing either...it is a tough time....good luck to you! I am in Md. I heard parts of California had new guidelines for ssdi they are testing in areas as well as some other states...hope your'e not in that group! I always do want to thank people who help me....and lately its been the medical profession. They know me by name at our local xray/mri place!

When i was a nurse the candy kept me awake and moving. (Nightshift)
ER got very busy at night,i promise we never had the time to eat over
your sweet Aunty. But it helped when we didn't have time to eat.energy.
I wouldn't ant anyone to drop a candybar in or on me. Sue