Cliff, I have this quote printed on reminder cards in a few places around my home...
If I'm especially hurting physically and feeling down, usually just reading this and meditating for a few minutes, will get me get through the day.

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I'm 85 and was diagnosed about 25 years ago. Absolutely refused to accept it because I knew I could think of something to make it go away.

First, I lost feeling and strength in left arm & hand. Dropped everything. Neuro said nothing could be done. I bought a grip ball from a golf shop. It basically never was out my hand for about a year. My grip came back and
still works.

A few years forward and I suddenly lost control of my right foot. Could move it tripped over with each step. Neuro said nothing could be done. I found ways to make it work again. After over a year it worked fine and I've never had another case of 'drop foot'. I'll be glad to be more specific about things to do if anyone wants help.

PN is one of several battles I deal with 24/7. I get vexed still because my body refuses to do most everything. Fortunately, my mind is still clear so I
keep busy coping.

Cliffman, all of us with PN feel as you do. Venting here will help some for that reason. We hear you. Every reply was someone who vents our frustrations, too.

Cliffman:

I'm fortunate that my symptoms aren't as bad as what you are describing. But, there's still a lot of projects (car maintenance, home repairs, etc.) that I can now do only with great difficulty if at all. You can't stop being "you", you just have to morph into a "new you". I'm in my mid-50's and was already reaching a point where certain things I loved, like playing sports were getting difficult. So, I was already thinking about what I was going to do as I aged and had to find new activities to participate in.

When the PN hit, the shift just had to start taking place much quicker than I planned. I go out to dinner with friends instead of playing basketball with them. Instead of hiking in the woods and geocaching, I go wine tasting. I read more books. I go to more movies. And, I spend time on this forum......

One of the things I've been reading about lately is vinyards and wine making. I love to have a glass of wine with my wife and friends, and wine tasting has been a hobby for a while. Now, I'm seriously considering small batch home wine making as an extension of that hobby. (I know alcohol is not good for us with PN, but I exercise moderation - and the enjoyment for me is more from the companionship of friends and family rather than the alcohol consumption.)

So, the bottom line is try not to dwell on the things you can't do. Think about what you still can do - and how you can expand those things into new directions that you may not have thought of before.

Im 65 and recently diagnosed , I feel so bad mentally all the time. Its the why me, I have constant burning feet and legs. I cant stop thinking about my illness. In fact thats all I think about ... I see you made it for 20 years I dont think I can , because why do I have to have this.? Thank you for your post you gave me hope.

Thank you to everyone that replied...it helped to know that I was not a complete fool to try.

Acceptance is tough given this is so new to me and perhaps it will never happen. However, I learned from reading your posts that one must try or suffering becomes magnified. What makes it difficult is all the memories of doing almost anything with ease and the reality of how hard it is to do most things now.

BTW, the plumber came and fixed what I could not complete so once again there's running water. I will certainly pick my battles more carefully going forward...well at least I hope I do since I can be pretty stubborn.

Cliffman

I think I look at this question a bit differently. I think dealing with a chronic condition like this goes in stages. I have dealt with my condition for 19 years now and I have gone through times of anger, denial, acceptance, etc...just like stages of grieving, because you are grieving, in a way. Grieving the life you once had.

You will miss the things you used to do, but find appreciation for new things you discover. You will get angry when you cannot accomplish tasks that were once easy, but then you will have a whole new sense of achievement when you are successful with other things (even ones on a smaller scale).

The most important thing to realize is that you need to treasure each day you have and make the most of it...whether it's a good or bad day. If you look hard enough if you will find good in every day...and this is what you need to focus on.

In other words, focus on what you still have and new things that you are appreciating, and not on what you have lost.

Hi Cliffman,

There are so many wise words here that I agree with. I too went through stages of grieving. What we go through is a loss of ability and it is terribly, tragically sad. Having life turned upside down is a challenge for anyone and getting stuck is not uncommon.

I found myself in a deep, dark hole full of despair, in spite of a supportive family, child to raise and much to be grateful for. It took the help of a professional counselor who specialized in chronic pain and traumatic life change to help me move forward. She also helped me work on coping skills to deal with pain. With CRPS and a nerve injury I need them! I truly feel she helped me get my life back.

If you find that you are struggling with depression and anxiety that don't lift, please consider getting help for the journey. It can make a tremendous difference in reaching acceptance more quickly and more fully than can sometimes be done alone.

Hold on to hope, and keep gently testing your limits and trying new things. You will be astounded at the strength and resilience you have and the amount of joy you will still find in life.