You made me laugh! I have a vivid imagination and you both sure stirred it up. Cyclops you gotta find something to do. Some hobby. I know..takes so much effort, but you can do it. I'm still making jewelry. Sometimes I spend hours on the computer (days the eyes are willing) looking for 4 small pearl cabocheons (I know it's mispelled, but I'm too lazy to look it up). Seems no one makes them in a 3mm size. But this task occupies me for a couple of days. Then I decide..I can use onyx and the search is on. Occupies me for a few more days until I finally get lucky. Then I get to check the mailbox for several days until the stones needed to repair the earrings for a dear friend arrive.

You get the idea. These things keep me going. You have to have some purpose in your life, no matter how small. And I think something like this would be so much warmer and less likely to freak out the neighbors Glenn.

Billye

I have to find a hobby too. I want to learn to chrochet. As for the depression. I mean for me of course now a lot goes with my pain level. Right now my pain is very high with spreading issues and my mood is in the garbage. It is like when docs ask are you depressed about the pain. Yes of course I am. I used to be able to do so much and now its like I am just happy when my pain is tolerable and to sit in more comfort. My mom was saying though like when I have a moderate pain day and I can distract I seem to have a better mood. So I agree with silverlady about distraction though some pain of course it is impossible. Silverlady I took a jewlery class it is fun. My friend sells hers on the net. You should think of similar. I bet some people on the board may even buy.As we say in my therapy world one day at a time or even one moment. Many hugs to all and happy wishes

Its so hard - as mentioned - to "step away" from pain, etc.... and hobbies do help a lot! - my challenge has been to find new ones that dont require tons of physical exertion like my old ones - and I know when I play a bit with a hobby I've found I can do kinda at an angle so my back doesnt hurt - I forget the pain and time flys by....

Billye - know what you mean by looking for hours for one item - takes so much longer sometimes to find what you are looking for then actually making it! And I think my mailman has come to the point he's afraid I'm going to tackle him for any packages!

Can't be any worse than my mail....I get ROCKS in my mail...and he has to climb 15 stairs to deliver it! LOLOLOL

I am learning a butt load from you guys about coping. I have searched in vain for some talent that I could transform into a hobby. But I sometimes do stuff even without the talent and still enjoy it. But running with the wolves....maybe that's my talent! I may give that a try.

And Daniella, I have been meaning to say how sorry I am that you are experiencing new pain. I admire you so much for the courage and strength you have had to struggle with the eating disorder issues and now this. You are so brave! And many others here, too, are just incredible. It is just inspirational.

Thanks. Did I need that booster cause I am going nutty right now from what is going on with me and my docs who do nothing or actually make me worse. To me everyone else here is so strong but I don't see that in myself. It is funny what we can see in others or how we can give advice in others but not ourself. I also like hobbies that I am not good at. I don't know if you have this kind of place near you all but is a place where you paint ceramics for your house or a gift and then they fire it. It is really fun and pretty calm.Do you have any animals? I know if able to care for one they can be theraputic but for myself I don't feel up to having that responsibilty. I got a dog when I left treatment years ago and it lives with my parents.
On a med note natural fish oil supp. Maybe Mrs D mentioned this but one of my old psych had me on so many reg meds and when none made me even a little bit better he added in fish oil supp. I was thinking not like the typical pain clinic like I went to at cleveland but like one I went to for eating disorders but for people in pain. Its mostly group therapy,individual,different topic groups like healthy living and a light exercise program depending if you qualified. I have mixed feelings on programs like I was in but the support you get from others is amazing and you do learn tools.

Ok, we have to make a slight modification in the wolf thing....can't do it naked....

have to stay semiclothed.....

AND the wolves have to be coyotes....we don't have enough wolves down here to be effectively pursued by, unless, the one ocassional lone wolf would do.....

However, one caveat....the coyotes, are being pursued by rabid men with guns lately....any suggestions?

I can handle the bites, as my legs are pretty numb....however, the bullets on my behind, which still for some 'idiopathic' reason still has 'feelings' might hurt. (And not in the Barry Manilow kind of way)

I used to spin wool, which means of course, I used to knit, and crochet....(never got to raising sheep, but I did raise chickens--feathers don't spin) some days, those darn fingers work more like chopsticks. If I do get a project started, I don't seem to understand when to put it down, so the next day, I have these 5 fingered unresponsive washrags hanging from my wrists, which makes toilet paper an issue.....never the less, I do engage in 'fibersports'.

I sewed my daughters' prom dresses and then decided to sew formals and bridals, I have at least 10 hanging in my closet, some with beautiful beadwork....my new house is way too small to lay all that out....and you do not want to pick all that material up every evening to eat supper....

I started scrapbooking, but any one who knows what kind of brood I have understands that I have a room packed full of bins of pics....and yes, I do know which kid is which...and when it was taken....I have a 3 foot pile of pics all in nice cute little page protectors....and glue everywhere.

I do write, and have sent in a few things, to my husband's mortification, some got published. It had nothing to do with my linen closet contents. He was quite concerned what people in town might think of him.

On the pets, I am down to 3 dogs, albeit large...and they are well trained....I was at one point, before I got sick, thinking about doing this search and rescue thing, seeing as I used to do that kind of stuff....

I decided against it because now when I get stressed, I pass out like a fainting goat these days....at the least, I get dizzy because my blood pressure seems to respond to adrenaline the wrong way. So, I think it best to stay away from crisis. Depressing I know.

I can't walk the dogs on the ice....they pull. It is called skijouring, when you do it purposely, but I am not very good at it....it will cause the same issue that kiteskiing did.

I garden, but we have 80 inches of snow and not much grows here in the winter.....maybe I need a chia pet.

The cats, I have 2, and am babysitting 2 for a few weeks, they have another use for my potted plants ...never the less, I have both indoor and outdoor gardening to busy me....and I keep the litter spoon handy.

Last year I grew 200 purple cone flowers in the house, and the plant light fell on the floor and burned a hole right thru to the basement....forget everything I have ever said about chemistry and plastics.....nonfammable materials saved my life....this year, I have to buy the plants...hubby said no more 'grow operations' in the house and I had to fix the hole I made. It is called logical consequences.

I do have my one eighth of an acre garden awaiting my adventures in gardening (which also lands me in the ER).

I read, but I read too fast.

I trained my fish, a beta, to dance for food. Now I have a regular Chippendale of my very own.

I painted the interior of the house last year, twice, which begs the question why I had to do the bedroom again...hubby did not like the blue...it is beige..greige now, and yes, he did help.

I have beads, but picking those little suckers up is getting to be a problem, especially if they are smaller than a doorknob. If you find a market for doorknob sized jewelry, count me in.

My daughter thoughtfully bought me a journal, but I can't write very well with a pen anymore....so I have to type and paste it in some days.

My bike is on the windtrainer in the living room and I mount up, in the cleats and padded shorts and the whole deal....I look like some one from Boulder....

However, I must be inspired to suffer for a while, and that only happens if I listen to enough '80's rock on my new subscription to sattelite radio, to make myself think I am younger than 40.

It happens. It is wonderful when it does, but eventually the psychotic break is over and, I have to deal with the reality of what I have done to my body....

Then when the weather turns nice, I really lose it and actually go for rides, by myself, no less....I get quite a ways from home some days....and I really look like some one from Boulder.

(I can get so far on technique which comes from 25,000 miles of riding---you don't want to see me riding home from how far I got....which is always as far as I think I can get, with no thought given to how I will get home.)

I ride like a bike messenger, at least on the trip out, and you would never think I was sick OR old, nor timid....you would be surprised how much a bike equalizes even the infirm, at least downhill and with a tailwind.

I have occassionally been brought home by a sympathetic townie or concerned cop....but in general, I make it. (Cycling never lands me in the ER-except when I got hit oh--and bit) I have a hunch it WILL land me in the ER....given my lack of hand control these days, and the complexity of what is mounted to my handlebars---which resembles a cockpit more than a bike. This bike has way too much carbon fiber, titanium and circuitry than is reasonable for a woman my age and in my condition. Old habits die hard.

I suppose I could learn to fly a plane, but I think that blood pressure thing will kind of rule that out. You pilots out there, feel free to chime in.

Yes, I fly kites...and am a certified kite pilot for what that is worth.

When the windchill gets above 20, I will venture out on the road on foot, and walk a few miles, or go to the state park with my pepper spray. If I walk enough, I get this crazy idea that I can 'run'. That usually doesn't last too long. I never, ever could run like a runner....(clue). Since I don't feel my feet..... My husband tried to tactfully coach me into a graceful gait, but it never worked and he tolerated running next to me, my slapping the pavement with each step and I tolerated his trotting and beating me....but I kicked his butt on the bike and in the water. He is a far stronger and better person than I can ever be.

I oscillate all night after 'running', which now amounts to ten steps of a jog for every mile walked... same as when I ride the lawn tractor to mow our minor acreage. I have no idea when the weather turns nice again if this will be feasible....I have a hunch unless I have a talented orthotist, it will go the way of skiing....maybe not.

Now I have this floppy foot thing, which is thoroughly annoying, but it keeps my busy watching my feet. I do bring a functioning cell phone....and my husband is thinking of buying me a GPS beacon, as I am incourrigable. We have this deal....I went out happy....tell the local press, I went out doing what I always wanted to do, regardless of how embarassing what I may have been doing was.

Nothing scares me more than dying in bed and thinking about it for hours ahead of time. I almost 'went out' in my head on 21 years ago, and that felt best for my personality. I much prefer trauma to chronic....and now I have to live with a brood of kids I raised to think the same way.

I have been hauled to the rock show, the horse show, the county fair, the zoo and the major league baseball game, the cirque de soleil thing, a Lewis Black show, and the 'America' concert in the last year....oh and I was plopped on a plane to Colorado, by myself....and told 'you can do it'.

I was picked up, appropriately in 'baggage claim', by my daughter. When I got there, I painted my daughter's new apartment. (No ER trip that time)

She was going to take me to Scandinavia this year, but hubby said we were too broke

....and I was too broken right now.

I weeble and wobble but haven't fallen down (much)....enough to hurt, but no ER trips recently due to adventure, nor misadventure.

Skiing is out of the question....I admit. I am adjusting.

I am more dangerous in the kitchen than anywhere....burns and cuts....never the less, I canned 100 quarts of pickles....I dont even like pickles, but if Armagedon ever comes, I am sure they will sustain us or kill the enemy. The other stuff I canned we are slowly eating....I hate to cook...I didn't used to, but I hate to cook now...mostly because I am not hungry.

I am generally not allowed to shop alone unless I vow to get only one thing, the thing I went for....it is best if I have cash and not a debit card.

My favorite store is Menards, and the power tool section....I just bought a Paslode Angle Nail Gun....(sweet) Hubby hates Menards, he likes the grocery store....but he admits, he likes the nail gun, good thing, it was his Christmas present....I am thoughtful aren't I?? I have not been allowed to use it yet...well at least not while he is home, but I had to figure out how to use it and how to load it....

Oh for a while there, my son was teaching me marksmanship...but there is no where good to shoot around here, and since he got home from Iraq, he has to go shoot for therapy, and apparently that does not include hauling one's mother along....it is some male bonding thing...that is fine, ammo scares me. Besides, I can't pull a trigger very well anymore.

The other place I do a lot of damage is a bike store....my son just got a job at one....heh, heh....can you say discount???? I just have a lot of trouble getting thru the bubble wrap packaging.

I bought a camera....slightly more sedate. I am working on sedate.

I am trying to find constellations, but it is awful cold out there at night, I could freeze my asstronomical out there right now. That would be unspectacular.

I lost my wood burning kit, and I gave up the carving...the kite thing soured me on having things sewn back on.

Tried oragami...just do not get it.

Every single thing I have written is true, which probably backs up the theory that this disease may be affecting my brain.

Ok, so I need a sedate hobby. I need several. That is apparent.

I hurt like heck if I sit still OR if I do even the most extreme thing I can possibly pull off without ending up in the ER, again....when I can't do something...when the limb won't work....then, it is time to move on to a new endeavor....so, I need ideas...lots of them. In the mean time, I will 'call in sick' now and then.

Besides, there are way too many inspirational people out there, that keep me feeling like a slug if I don't attempt the impossible....they do it....so--- yes we can!

Oh God, I have been watching too much election coverage.....