[daniella]

Ok. I know this is a theme in my posts. I just don't know what to do. I feel everything I try makes me worse not better and the docs are never accountable after. On top of my inner ankle/foot/calf issue which has been in a major flare up of pain I have been dealing with an eye issue for 9 months. I have been to 25 eye apts with 6 opthamologist and started a new eye med which made my eyes way worse. Now this is after so long I am in so much eye pain. So I get very frustrated because I am left to suffer. This was like the straw that broke the cammels back.Now I am suppose to get a tunneled epidural catheter and do pt twice a day.The issue is I fear more pain and though this is horrible it is better then it was when I started here. I have many bad pt experiences that last and last.I had asked the doc what happens if I am in more pain and he was like you will be in mental therapy too and then possibly a spinal cord stimulator. He understands my pain I think but I guess I have to accept being in more pain while trying new interventions till I find the right one and I am not sure I can.He is my 4th pain doc. I want a life back but feel like giving up and just doing nothing. Just so much to face getting better with the leg and eye it seems hopeless. I have begun to isolate from everyone again and get very angry at my mom again who tries and does so much but then will say somethings that make me so mad. I don't wish this on anyone but people go about their lives and don't understand to the fullest. Yes I am loosing my mind but it has been so long so to be told that I am having some mental episode is very aggrevating.I had a little freak out meaning just getting upset and yelling and saying I am done with docs because of everything. Let me add too when this hapened with my leg and was going through the tests and trying meds/pt I was crying in pain through vicodin every few hours and in bed and no one did anything for me doc wise. So I fear that again. Any thoughts on what I should do or how I should act?Thanks for listening