What is the stupidest comment you have heard about your MS?
 

Funny article! Read the responses (link is about half way down the page on the left). Makes me feel better about some of the things I've had said to me! :o

http://ms.about.com/od/livingwellwit...marks.htm?nl=1

My MIL's comment, years ago...."You couldn't have MS....I have a friend in a WC, with MS".:rolleyes::mad:

Sally -guess each person can only know one person with MS at the same time! :p

My DH's friend when I told him I was dx'd with MS "My condolences". :mad: That's still my favorite comment ever said to me.

One of my husband's bosses made the comment to him about how he was surprised how smart I seemed even though I could barely walk.

gmi

I was having a wobbly day about 4 years ago and one of my son's karate instructors noticed (guy was 27 at the time). He teased me about being sloshed, I said nope bad MS day. He blurted out that he had an aunt that had just died from MS complications! :eek: I just said well let us pray that is a long time off for me :D. I thought the poor boy was gonna cry... I told him I'd watched enough karate, that I'd backfist him good if he felt bad about seeing me come into the Dojo.!!

What is it that makes people feel the need to tell you about so-and-so who has MS and is in terrible shape? Or has died? :confused: :mad:

It's almost like they feel they have to "one-up" you with their story. I haven't noticed this with other diseases. If someone tells me they have diabetes I don't immediately launch into a story about my uncle who lost both his legs to it. Or the person who tells me they have arthritis.....I don't mention my Grandmother who could barely use her hands the last years of her life. WHY would I do that??? WHY do they do it??? Are they trying to make us feel better? It's not working! :rolleyes: :p I have one comment for these poor souls..........."Here's Your Sign". :cool:

I'll go back and read more of those when I'm not so tired.

Funny, sometimes someone will say something and I almost arch my back and hiss. I think, "How could you SAY something that stupid?"

Other times, I remember the well-intentioned but stupid things I've said myself, and give them the benefit of the doubt.

Guess it all depends how charitable I'm feeling that day.

I'm glad I didn't snap at the 90-year-old lady who said, "Are they sure that's what you have?" At the time I was offended, but in retrospect, I realized it was her way of hoping it wasn't an official diagnosis perhaps.

I guess people say stupid things about MS because people say stupid things.

Okay, now I'll get back to trying to think of my entry...

Shortly after I was dx and in the middle of my first flare, I managed to make it to school off and on. One of my students said at least you aren't in a wheel chair. I wasn't getting around too great at the time with my cane. And a colleague in another department insisted on knowing what was wrong with me. When I finally told her, she told me that she had a neighbor that had ms and it appeared that I was really going down hill quickly:rolleyes:.

when a neighbor heard about my MS, she said "OMG! everyone I know that has ever had MS has been in a WC within 3 years! I cant believe I am going to have to watch another friend go down that path!"

I really wanted to slap her. :eek:

The one that stands out in my mind wasn't the woman's fault, because she didn't HEAR me correctly.

I was having trouble getting around, and she asked if something was wrong...

I replied, "I have MS".

And she said, "Oh, I know what you mean, I'm a mess, too!"

I've now learned to say "multiple sclerosis" unless I'm sure the person knows what MS means. :D

That was great. made me day a little brighter.

it wasn't so much the comments i received upon telling people I had MS as the two comments made from a friend (who, fortunately for them, lives on the other side of the country) the day I was told it is definitely progressive. My friend calls me upon hearing the bad news and tells me how my fiance better hurry up and marry me while I am still able to walk down the aisle; followed by "I am going to get some money set aside so I can come see you before you die".:eek: Thanks Buddy, that is exactly what I need to hear after my doc tells me it's not going to ever get better! If I had the money I would have flown the 2,000 miles just to slap this person!

Oh and all of those well meaning friends who all have a cure for MS! Oh you should drink this (insert random OTC Suppliment), or bee stings work...well, why haven't you tried electric shock therapy? You should take Copaxone it will clear it right up! Well, thats why they make those interferons!

The best one: My mother went to a psychic who told her my grandmother (who died 22 yrs ago) says I do not have MS and all I need to do is eat asparagus, eggplant, AND sweet potatoes at least 3 days a week and I will be cured! :rolleyes:

I don't know who's worse....people who don't have a clue or people who actually know a little about MS.

I spoke with a lady in the grocery store once and we discovered we both had MS. I was wearing my MS Walk sweatshirt and that got the conversation started.

She had been denied SSDI twice and was still appealing the decision. I made the mistake of telling her I was approved on my first attempt. I fully believe it's because my Neuro and PCP had such thorough records. She all but accused me of "manipulating the system". :eek: I was just as surprised as the next person that it was as easy as it was. But I surely didn't do anything to help it along. Well, nothing but have MS. :rolleyes: She was rude and questioned me as though I was on trial. :mad: I pushed a button on my cell phone that makes the ringer sound so I told her I needed to take the call........I HAD to escape!

I'm more careful what information I share and with whom now. That'll teach me to be so talkative! :o

LOL Kitty. :) That reminds me of many years ago when I got a part time job at a local computer company after staying home for 15 years to raise our sons.

I told my optometrist's receptionist about it and she looked me up and down and said, "How did you get that job?" :eek: :o :rolleyes:

I wanted to crawl out of there!!

The thing is, they hired me because they specifically wanted somebody that knew nothing about computers. :D They didn't want me to tell people how to fix their problems over the phone, lol. I was there to help people and get them in to pay for repairs and upgrades. :D

My worst, and stupidest comment was from a PhD psychologist who was giving me therapy sessions after my dad died. I told how weak the heat made me and she said "but that happens to everyone." :Soapbox:

She was great except for that. :D (And she had no air conditioning in her office.) :eek:

The first and ONLY time my brother even spoke of my MS he said "ya know, heat is really bad for you"! Duh! This was more than a year after I was dx and my brother knows that I research everything! I think maybe he wanted me to know that he did a little research on his own. It just seemed so silly at the time. I live in South Florida for crying out loud :). I know ALL about the heat.

I guess I realize why we've called him "Kirk the jerk" for years :D.

Here's a better (or worse) one:

When I was in the hospital for ON this summer, in severe pain, the neuro on staff said to me "Optic neuritis isn't usually painful"!!!!!!! Idiot.

Definitely my manager (at the time) at work saying "Oh so you have MS? I have a friend with MS and she's just fine!".

That's great idiot, no 2 people are the same with MS and I'm in a carpload of pain, but thanks for 100% empathy and knowledge of my neurological disease.

*dripping with sarcasm* :rolleyes:

If someone had said something like that to me during the height of the pain from the ON I had 3yrs ago, I probably would have whacked them over the head to replicate the headache pain, and then pulled their eyeball out with a spork and told them that's what optic neuritis feels like.

I remember reading some really old medical encyclopedia that my dad had gotten when he was younger (not sure how old the encyclopedia was) that had a description of MS...said that it was a neurological disease and that it was generally painless, or something like that.

Granted it was an old book, but geeze, all they had to do was ask an MS patient about the pain and they could have cleared up that misconception. My MS isnt even that painful yet, and I can already tell people that "yes, there's pain involved" when they ask questions about the MS.

I'm really not looking forward to the future pain that I'm expecting to get. Hoping it holds off for a looooong time.

Oh yeah I forgot those guys... Funny, I only knew one person with MS when I was diagnosed...but it seems everyone I know knows a guy who knows a guy who's mom's haridresser's babysitter's boyfriend has MS and they are just as normal as they can be. It doesn't even effect them at all!

Where can I get THAT version of this dang thing?

My brother told me he had 2 MS friends, one was in a wheelchair but both doing well. A little later asked about his friends, he kinda ducked his head and stammered that friend with mild MS doing OK, other friend killed himself. Since I've gone into a chair he walks on eggshells around me. My sister is like having an over-concerned mom, prefers I not move or do anything when she's here. Me? I have some more wine.

I get the oh; you are one of Jerrys kids?
No; Montels.

You are so lucky it isn't something serious.
Oh yes; it could be worse.

You should get some bees since bee stings cure MS!!
I am allergic to bee venom; guess I will never be cured now.

How much time do you have left?
Five minutes or less...bye.

So far the stupidest comments that I've had were from relatives.

One who thinks I'm a hypochondriac. She said that I'm faking it. First time she said anything about it, I think she said "I dont believe her...she's lying".

Another relative, who has a painful chronic condition that's also considered an autoimmune disease (not MS) doesnt seem to believe me either. But, I'm not sure about that. I'm probably the only family member she has that can relate to her pain and fatigue. (I dont even have bad pain or really bad fatigue yet, but when I get some bad flares, I've gotten a bad taste of what the exhaustion feels like)

I know I can definately relate to her neuropathy that she's had in her feet from her disease. I just dont mention my numbness because she'll think I'm competing with her, or trying to one-up her on crappy feelings.

One doctor that I went to see about two years ago (a urologist) kept telling me how sorry he was that I had MS. Kept looking at me like I was going to croak in his office while he was taking my History for a problem I was having at the time. Dude...chill!

my drug addicted sister told me I am "lucky" to have MS. When I tell folks I want to go lay down, they will fluff my pillow for me, but when she complains about being tired, people tell her how lazy she is. Said she would give anything to have such a "convienent" disease :eek:

One of my customers came in one day and he said, "My wife said you got diagnosed with MS?" and I said yes. He kind of shrugged and said, "Well, everybody has something, I guess."

I was so hurt! BUT! A couple of days later he came in and we talked, and it turned out he had been trying to get up the nerve to share with me about his own (serious) health concern, and he apologized for being so preoccupied that he said something hurtful.

Around the holidays or any family gathering...

The older family members sit around a table and compare health-complaints and problems ... the discussion goes on and on...

ankle problems, weight problems, going to 3 doctors for 4 different problems...

again it goes on and on... :deadhorsebeat:

They all know I have MS and they don't dare to invite me into the conversation because they know what my response would be:

"Ya, I'm doing okay... given that I have a disease that has no cure because a direct cause hasn't been discovered";)

Right now, for me, the MS is invisible i.e. my symptoms -- fatigue, cognition...

Oh, I sometimes get the honey-bee sting therapy suggestion. No thanks.

The bee-sting one... "oh, I heard some people got cured for [X, Y or Z] from getting stung" .... :rolleyes:

that would count as one of the dumbest things I've heard...

Niko:cool:

I was stung multiple times a couple of years before I was dx. I can say with certainty that it did not work for me!

Wow Dej, that's nuts.

Erin...on the hypochondriac subject, I was accused while in limbo by several 'friends' of mine of being hypo. Should have seen their faces when they heard the diagnosis.

I don't speak to them anymore. ;)

'Oh well, look on the bright side...' said my mum.

:Poke:

she's since read up a lot and is convinced I need more vitamins. ok. whatever.

and from my Bowen 'therapist' - 'So you always look like you're just sleepwalking then?'

A PA that still works at my doctor's office all but accused me of being a hypochondriac when I complained of numbness in my right thigh in May of 2006. Because she couldnt find evidence of a broken bone or sprain or obvious injury, she told me there was nothing wrong with me and sent me on my numb little way.

In August of 2006 I had my first episode of optic neuritis, and that's when they told me I might have MS and were very interested to hear that I'd had numbness since very early April or March of that year. (I waited a long time before kvetching to the PA about the numbness)

In January of 2007, I got the diagnosis of MS. I remember taking my mom to the doctor there for something about that time and seeing the PA in the hallway outside the exam room my mom was in. PA asked me how I was. I got a little snippy with her and said "I've got MS, thanks for treating me like I was a <bleepity bleep> hypochondriac".

She just said "sorry", and got out of my way really quick. I hope she's improved her bedside manner since then. Everytime I've had to deal with her she still treats me like I'm Little Miss Fakeity Fake, so I dont think she's going to change.

Thank goodness that doctor's office got another PA who is totally cool (and also works nights at the Emergicare that I've had to go to a few times this year for emergency antibiotics.) She at least trusts me when I say I've got a particular problem, because I've had enough of that particular problem to know when I've got a real problem.

'Oh well, it could be worse...' (no doubt it could)

'Well at least you don't have children...' (?)

She 'Are you having trouble coming to terms with it?'
Me 'No, I'm having trouble with falling OVER and the holes in my brain'

Neuro receptionist 'Well we're all going to die of something, I could get hit by a bus!' (Learn to look left, look right then)
'Learn to live with it' (That helps)
'Live life to the FULL' (hadn't thought of that)
'Get back on your horse, that must be easy enough, just sit there' (very high up on an animal that thinks there's a lion stalking it at all times)

Awwwwwwwwwww!!!
 

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Awwww! This photo made my day! I think I'm in love!

LOL These are great! One time Jim was at the urologist and we were discussing his results. The doctor (head of urology mind you) turned around in his chair and said "You are lucky your doing so well. We never get patients in here with ms so long". I asked "Why is that"? He said "They are usually dead after x amount of years." I looked him in the eye and said "Obviously someone has not done his homework." He shut up and gave us Jim's results. LOL

But other than that nothing usually gets to us. I did comment on Kicker's thread about intimacy questions. Those are really fun to answer! :D

That photo is the CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTEST ever! :D

Unbelievable!! What a jerk!

gmi

Sounds like that Urologist is still reading the old scary medical books, Sandy..:rolleyes:

Well, I finally spoke up for myself today. I was in Rite Aid picking up a prescription and I went in the store. I usually go through the drive-thru but there were four cars lined up so I just went in.

As soon as I entered the store the florescent lights started doing their thing and I was instantly dizzy. I got a shopping cart so I'd have something to hold onto.

I got back to the pharmacy and parked my buggy off to the side (within my reach) and stood at the pickup counter. There was a woman and her teenaged daughter there, too. Their rx was ready before mine so I went to move over so they could get to the counter to check out. I didn't have my cart to hold onto and I sort of swayed back and forth and thought I was going to fall but I didn't. The woman looked at her daughter and sort of smirked and did the hand signal for too much to drink (drinking from an invisible cup). :mad: The daughter sort of half-smiled but didn't say anything. I saw it all. I started not to say anything but then thought that I needed to set her straight.

I looked right at her and said "Excuse me but I couldn't help but see you signal to your daughter that you thought I'd been drinking. I haven't. I have MS....Multiple Sclerosis....and it causes me to lose my balance quite often. You can google it and learn quite a bit about it online." That's all I said. I wasn't mean about it but I did let her know that her actions did not go unnoticed.

She was a little flustered - probably more than she let on - and said "Oh, I have a friend with MS and I know how devastating it can be." No apology, nothing else. I just smiled and nodded and didn't say anything. I think I got my point across. Her daughter looked mortified and went to sit in the waiting area all the way at the other end of the counter! :cool:

Good for you, Kell..:highfive:

My favorite one was thrown out at me from a car window. :rolleyes:

No choice but to go to the grochery store on a day when my walking wasn't too great. I always look both ways before crossing the walk, especially on days like that. No cars when I started to slowly go across, but a guy comes barrelling down from the entrance and screeches on the brakes when he gets close.

"Can't you go any faster?" he yells at me.

My response was to shake my head and say, "Nope. And by the way, the speed limit is only 15 through here."

He kept mumbling, but he was blushing too. :D

An ER doctor recently disbelievelingly said "Really, you're in pain? We don't usually see that in MS patients." I then pointed out that MS causes muscle spasms and muscle spasms usually cause pain.