How I am doing
 

I thought I'd start a new thread because I'm not quitting smoking now.

I went on a little day trip with my sister, aunt, cousin, nephew, and my sister's MIL to observe my deceased mother's birthday.

Not 10 minutes down the road, my cousin started a bunch of drama. I had an anxiety attack. I popped a xanax which helped. However, the best relief was my 3 yo. nephew. I got to sit next to him. I focused all my attention on him and everything else faded into the background.

I crashed when I got home.

I'm still having s/s thoughts, but I'm mainly flat with periods of high anxiety.
I thought I'd be in the psych ward by now, so I guess things are going better than expected.

-Kay

That is great to hear you are doing better. Just hearing you were able to focus on your nephew and enjoy his company is awesome. Little kids can help remove all the drama and crap going on in ones family life. Oh do I know all about that!!:wink:

You are a great person- a wonderful person... Look at how you made a big difference in your nephews life. It is obvious how much he adores you. :)

Hang in there!!! :hug:

Lots of hugs and hope!!!

Coffeegirl

-Kay[/QUOTE]
Dear Kay,
I'm sorry you are in difficulty.
If you need to go the the hospital, go. They might not even take you. Sometimes they evaluate in the ER and send you home, but you can be seen by a pdoc.
It's a good idea to use all the tools available to you.


I've used Xanax when I had to deal with family. It does the job.

M.

i am glad you are taking the pressure of not smoking away from you now.
thank goodness for little boys. there is hope and i think because you were wise enough to concentrate on him, you will see yourself out of this agony

take care
bobby

hi kay,
you lived thru and that anniversary is done with.
I am sure that is a relief.
It was a brilliant move on your part to focus on the child....
YOu were in close quarters no wonder you had a panic attack, xanax is good for those occasions, maybe IF you go next year you can drive seperately?
Weren't you manic when you first started posting?
if you don't mind sharing what your meds are now...
when do you see someone again?
tdoc pdoc?
bizi

Just wanted to say hi kay,
hope you are doing alright.
((((HUGS)))
bizi

Dear Kay

once again i am reminded of Mari's telling us of her therapist saying to stay in the present. which is what you did.

and i couldn't help thinking you picked a "natural" guide" for this.

young children don't know how not to stay in the present. mommy not here = bad. mommy here = good. no difference between mommy gone long time or short time.... both = mommy not here = bad. this starts to "improve" dramatically after identity formation... but what is improving is the child's ability to relate to our concepts of temporal continuity and causality. and the more they do so, the more they lose spontaneity.....

i am glad you were able to lose yourself in your nephew's spontaneity and "presence."

~ waves ~ probably being too philosophical as usual

Thinking of you Kay!!

Hugs.... Take care!!

Coffeegirl

Thank you again :grouphug:

I'm doing a bit better- less flat, but still anxious with periods of s/s thoughts.
I'm so glad that my little nephew was there! We're not expecting a return visit for next year. We just went because it was my mother's would-be 60th and a store's grand opening.

Surprisingly, holidays are usually very relaxed. My cousin is going to be 18- she's usually pretty quiet and in good behavior during dinner. Then she throws a fit and hides when my aunt tells her she can't leave and see her friends.

Mari,
I was forced to go to the ER before by my former pdoc (the witch) after she increased effexor, leading to mania.
They discharged me with the recommendation that I seek another MH opinion.
I wouldn't hesitate to go to the ER if needed.


Bizi,
Yes, I was manic when I started posting. I've been dealing mostly with mania and periods of normal mood with anxiety (I guess that never goes away).
I wanted my effexor decreased because of this, but my current pdoc held off last month because of the possibility of mood change d/t the change of seasons....
Here's a list of my current MH meds/dosages:

Lamictal 150mg daily
Effexor 150mg am, 75mg pm
Xanax 0.5mg 3Xdaily, PRN
Trazodone 100mg at bedtime, for sleep

I take 6 other meds. not including vits/mins and OTCs for constipation.

I see my psychologist the 25th, and the pdoc on the 26th.

Kay

Dear Kay,
Thanks for telling me that you are comfortable about going to the ER when you need to go.

I hope today goes well for you.

I'm doing one day at a time right now.

M.