Keep Smilin,

I worked for 6 months after the onset of my RSD (at that point, I was not yet "officially" diagnosed). The worst thing was the way I got "fired". I went into work one day to find a replacement girl there to do my job. I was humiliated! I considered my boss and co-workers extended family and friends to me and nobody had the guts to sit me down and talk to me about what was going on with me medically. Now, in retrospect, I see that it would've been inevitable that I could no longer work. Only one co-worker keeps in touch with me since that day.....eventually they move on without you....still continuing thier lives while you sit home 1) because you are in too much pain to attend social activies and 2) since you are no longer working, you cannot afford the social activities.

As I've stated before, the battle of the identity loss within has been hard. It's very apparent in the form of re-occurring dreams I have where I am AT my former job, but NOT ALLOWED to do any of the work (as in, for me, not being allowed to work on any clients). I wake up from these nightmares withl such an eerie feeling within. I wish I knew of SOMETHING to replace my former occupation with, but usually only end up with 'illusions of grand 'duer' when looking through the Help-Wanted Ads. I'm not sure about your particular level of ailment, but for me, the reality is I cannot handle any type of work at this time (I was approved for SS Disability, but I would rather work!)

One thing I do have going for me..... as far as a hobby I have that I can continue to do...... is that I write novels. I have 2 completed, but never really had the time to pursue the steps to representation and publication. Not working has allowed me the time to do it, and maybe perhaps that is my next calling. I'd cross my fingers on it, but they're too darn painful to have to try and uncross. LOL!