Kathy I wnt to a good lawyer
 

Kathy I went to a good lawyer but he needs 5000 retainer. I am meeting with an estate man tomorrow to sell some things of mine in hope of raising it. that is also good news about the social services I will see when my sister can take me. I did look it up online and abondonment is a crime when someone is disabled. thank you that is good news. he actually said yoiu better see what social service you can get as he left to live in a 1000 dollar a month guest house in west palm beach for the season. I just am still in shock i am ttrying to move quickly but my body just wont work.
I dont even know where to begin. who to call etc. wow this is such good advice i cant thank you enough he already turned off the phone and cable i just cant believe he is doing this. I just really cant. thank you again so much do you knwo what i need to take with me to social services?

dc....

Again my heart goes out to you..but after reading your last thread... I have to say this and I hope it is not too early and be too hurtful as I would never mean that way... but..with all that you have on your plate..RSD and all... you, my friend will be better off in the long run..... Everyone..I mean everyone will have to answer to their actions one day..we don't not have to be present to see it but it will happen and unfortunatley the cheat will have to answer to his... How does anyone walk on someone they loved once and who is suffering with ill health????? You are better off..it will be sticky and sad until your can get all of your ducks in a row but you will..give yourself the time you'll need and most important...take care of yourself!! We are here for you..always! Again I am so sorry for your pain right now!!!!!

KS!~!:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grou phug:

It's not quite over yet.....

But, I know it will get somewhat better...

prayers,,

pete

Dearest DC, You have our deepest concern and willingness to help in anyway we can. On your last question, you might call social services, and ask them what you should bring. Write down everything to bring. In fact, go back to the day he left, save the note and write down what happens each day and the date and time. Besides opening your own checking account, you no doubt have a joint checking account, maybe savings account. You can withdraw 50% less one penney from each of those accounts and put in your new personnal account. Do you have joint taxes due in April? Property Taxes due? Ask your attorney what to get your name off of, so you aren't stuck with the bill when, in truth, you both are probably accoutable.Of course, you will pay your part, but his actions and your disability may alter the percentages according to the law. Anybody that does this type of behavior, you can not trust, no matter how you feel. All the rules change. Please look out after yourself. Does he have a good job? Your attorney can direct you in what you can do. If you are not on disability and disability insurance, you need that as soon as possible. Have you received an inheritance that you spent on joint matters? Make sure you write all down.
I read all the other posts, and am glad you are getting support.Please know you are in our prayers. Your attorney will help you use his criminal act toward your good welfare. I'm so very sorry. You might want to call you Dr. and let him know what is happening in your life. You may need to up your meds temporarily. I lost a dear friend, Like a son to me. in a car wreck, and had to up my meds for a while. As you know, emotional pain directly affects our physical health
Back in the 80's when my parents died, I went into counseling and found journaling very helpful. We tend to put off crying etc. but it is emotionally healthy to go thru the grieving process YOU WILL BE OK! Meditation, Bible Reading, Prayer, Stretching, Taking Time Each Day For ourselves help us get thru tragic events. Please know we all care for you ,loretta with soft hugs:grouphug:

Dear DC,

I just want to add another note of caution. Please check your credit cards. Are they in your name or are they in his name? I believe that you are both responsible for any debt incurred during the marriage but if you have joint cards you will want to make sure they are cancelled so that you don't get loaded down with any new debt that he may charge in your name. I know this is very painful but you really must look out for yourself now. He has shown through his cowardly actions that he is not worthy of your love.

We are all here to listen to you, to be a shoulder to cry on when you need us, to help lift you up when you feel weak. :grouphug:

Be good to yourself.

Sincerely

MsL

I am so sorry for your loss. I have not gone thru what u have just endured but I feel like my husband wants to leave me as well but has not yet. I know who am I to talk,right with everything I am going thru right now. But u know I am really trully sorry for your loss.

Sincerely,
Tracy

Also dc...... Does he have access or may know your SSN????? I always worry about ID theft.. sorry I know you have a ton to think about but once you act on these great thoughts and recommendations by our wonderful family here... better protected you will be..so sorry ...we are here..you just say how we can support you!!!!

KS:hug:

DC
So sorry to hear about your pain, I pray that the lord will restore your marraige,and happiness into your life,,,prayers are so powerfull..I truly hate to see relationships end,the pain and anguish,heartache...But God will deliver you,,,,,,Pray.......bobber

DC,please try to be strong during this time and not a victim,I know easier said than done. I do know how you are feeling because I have been thru two divorces! I can barely make end's meet right now. I do have one question for you,do the two of you have any children involed? I am just asking because I have three boy's. However now they are 33,30,21. My heart does go out to you! Was there any clue's? Or did you two have any talk's about problem's within your marriage? I am sorry that I am asking you all these ?. I just cannot believe that someone could just walk out after 12 years! Without even talking to you. I hope that you know that we are all here for you :hug: Anytime you want to pm me please do! I will be thinking about you DC! Always Breezy55 :Heart:

Protect Yourself
 

Dear CZZ74,
I just had some more thoughts once I read your post as well as the others too. You should ask your attorney if he can have your husband pay all your legal fees. If you get any money from the estate man don't put it in the bank. Get a safe deposit bank and keep it in your home in a stange place so no one would know it was there. Also, what about the changing the locks? Ask your lawyer if you can and do it right away. Get as much paperwork such as past tax forms, paystubs, etc. out of the house into a safe place because you may need them for reference. Any valuables get them out of the house especially your stuff for safe keep. I am sorry to have to tell you this stuff but I want you protected and with it all and then RSD your mind is not thinking right and you need help.

About Soc Services...I have never stepped foot in soc security or a welfare office because of my disability. I have done everything on the telephone such as conferences and downloaded forms over the internet. I did have to make copies of ss cards and driver's license but your sister can help you if you can't get out. Search for your state as Florida Department of Welfare and something should come up. Send everything certified if you can so you will have receipt of it all.

From what little he said to you I believe he is thinking with his "lower" brain and not using his "higher" brain which will benefit you in the long run (I am sorry to all you guys out there but I speak this from experience and I have a 21 year old son who went through a mess in the last year). Judges take abandonment very seriously. He made a big mistake.

Make a list of things you need to do and try every day (or at night like I do) to cross one thing off your list. This way it is not too overwhelming for you and you do feel like you have accomplished something each day and won't become too depressed over it all. There is light at the end of the tunnel but like others have said it will take time and alot of grieving.

He has been planning this for a long time. He may have waited until you had no money left just so he could use it all and leave you high and dry. Not a nice guy for sure. Let some poor unfortunate soul get him now...he is out of your hair. God bless that poor woman.

I am sorry you or anyone else has to go through this mess. But since he has made it clear this is what he is doing you need to step up and take care of yourself and for your future. You deserve much better than this guy. Let me know if you need any other help. We are all here for you.
Take care,
kathy d:grouphug: