He injured his sciatic nerve and paralyzed his foot from a bad car wreck. The pain is in his foot but is slowly crawling up his leg. I actually met him after the accident and he's explained what happened but hasn't really gone too deep into it and I've found it difficult to remember exactly what is wrong.

He has another round of five scheduled in a week and I don't even know how to prepare. I'm trying to get him to eat healthy meals and suggested we stop drinking alcohol (that's something we've been doing a lot of since this feels so hopeless).

He's been pushing me away and I don't know what to do. Do I listen to him and leave, as this is the most exhausting thing I've gone through, or do I continue, with the hopes that a) we can have a normal life together and b) he doesn't kill himself before we find a successful solution.

This is the only doctor I found in MA who might prescribe LDN. http://ardisfisch.com/about-me/ She is fairly far from Boston, but you might try calling her. She doesn't take insurance.

Also you might want to take him to see Pradeep Chopra in RI. According to google he is less than an hour away from Boston.

Has your boyfriend considered getting medical marijauna?

Would he consider going to a pain group? If you could find a good local one, you might get local information which could help him.

Only you can decide what to do. What I can tell you is that living with CRPS is like having a full body toothache. The pain can be a primary focus for most or all of the day, not because you choose it to be, it simply is. You simultaneously want to be alone, but be with someone. When I was very bad my sister came every day to sit and watch TV with me. I really could not do anything else, not even read-I could not think straight.

You cannot make good decisions when you are so wracked with pain, because your cognitive powers are on OFF.

I'm actually considering just ordering the n in pill formand turning it into ldn myself so he can control the dosage and see how that affects him. It doesn't seem too pricy and I want to get him this stuff asap.

I also have Mxe coming in, mostly for my own recreational use but j want him to try it and see how it works. I've self medicated with disassociating and hallucinogens to help with my own anxiety and depression (surprisingly they've worked on just a once and a while basis, it's been 3 months since I've done a 72hr Mxe bender and only now am I starting to slip back into depression).

He has marijuana, not medical though. It helps with the pain but he never uses it cause he doesn't like feeling high.

My problem is there's only so much I can do for him. I'm on a month to month temp job that pays decent (allowed me to take this spur of the moment trip, buy new tickets for all of us when we missed our train home) but it's Monday through Friday 9-5 with a two hour a day commute. I can't just take him to a doctor.

He lives with his dad who is also crippled so it's just a terrible situation and setting to be in. They plan on moving to Nashua New Hampshire soon (if he's alive long enough) and I've already told him I'd move in with him and look after them. But it's hard to even want to make that commitment when I don't know if he'd even survive that long.

A pain group may be good. I've always been wary of support groups. My mother was diagnosed with non-hotchkins lymphoma when I was about 4. She was at stage 4 and given three months to live. They suggested she go to a support group. She went to a few meetings but then realized it did her more harm than good, that it was too depressing and left. She always equated to her surviving and her cancer going into remission due to leaving the support group, which she felt was weighing her down, so it's not something I've suggested to him.

It doesn't help that he has depression, and both he and I believe he has bipolar disorder. He's been off medication for a few weeks now and I'm trying to get him back on. He's just not in a healthy place or state of mind right now and there's only so much I can do.

I hated every caregiver support group I went to, because there was no support, at least not the kind I wanted. I wanted advice, practical advice so I could survive and do a stellar job. Most of the people were not hands on caregivers, they were people dealing with the grief of seeing their parents slipping away, due to Alzheimer's.

A pain group is likely to be a different animal from what your mother and I experienced. Everyone there likely will have practical experience to share.

My sister has Non-H lymphoma. She would never go to a support group for it either, because she is using alternative therapies, which so far -6 plus years have started to shrink her tumors.

Also look up Tong Ren. It is a very strange healing therapy.

Medical cannabis is different than smoking it.

Also look into kratom. I don't know much about this, but it supposedly can help with pain.

Ill try suggesting it to him, but he doesn't seem very open to things. I want him to post on here, but he's in a pretty dark place.

I really appreciate all this advice. I wish I could get him to read this stuff but his temper is so short right now (rightfully so, as we had so much riding on this 5 day k treatment).

This new ones a week away so I'll try and work towards a healthier experience, but there's only so much I can do and I'm getting so exhausted. Yesterday was a serious test for me. Usually I'm the one considered a mess, but I'm having to pull people together and the few times I have break down moments, he isn't in the position to even handle them. It's very isolating.

It would be great if your boyfriend would join the forum. There are so many options and so much information that he could benefit from but it would be more meaningful and have more impact if he looked at those options himself. The whole lead a horse to water thing...

We all know where he's coming from. we have pretty much all suffered devastating losses, struggled with depression and fear, felt hopeless and frightened. We all take strength from one another. We find grace and beauty in spite of everything. You can help him by being supportive but you cannot save him. He's got to be open and reach out just a little for help to be something that is going to make a difference.

Reading about his nerve injury, I really feel he should get this looked at by the right specialists. These often go undiagnosed for long periods and "time lost is muscle lost". There is a window in which intervention in the right circumstances can alter the outcome dramatically. there are surgical options in some case but sometimes the nerve is in the recovery process and doesn't need anything but time. The right specialists can help figure this out. This is all helpful and may change his treatment plan. If he has not had a nerve conduction study he could use one. He could also get a peripheral nerve ultrasound to see if there is an identifiable lesion or scar entrapment that can be addressed non-surgically. Even Dr. Chopra says nerve entrapment is the first rule out (it can also cause CRPS on its own ). I think he is in Pawtucket , RI. BTW. I don't mind helping with info and resources. Send him our way. We're willing to pitch in.

There may be community resources that can assist with rides to doctors appointments. This a common volunteer opportunity. Your local United Way hotline (often 211) will be able to direct you. Your boyfriend would benefit from therapy during all this, preferable someone with experience in chronic pain, illness or traumatic life change. Hypnosis and EMDR are good for pain. Also, I'm going to come out and say this. I personally think drinking should be off the table for now. Alcohol is a depressant of course but it also causes histamine release and has effects on the nervous and circulatory system that could be detrimental. Diet should be as clean as possible. Caffeine has strong effects too.

I agree there is only so much you can do. Please take care of yourself and do not sacrifice more than you are willing to comfortably give up. You deserve a healthy partnership. I do not say that harshly or in any kind of judgement. Just be sure you are looking out for you too.

Thank you Littlepaw, for correcting my error, I know Chopra is in RI. I googled it correctly. LOL

I know what it is like for Arsenic. There is only so much she can do. I am pushing the LDN, because if it helps, even with mood, it might be all her boyfriend needs to push through to getting other help. When anyone suggested I travel anywhere I cried, because the car vibrations were so unbearable I could not go far without moaning. I gave up get togethers with friends, simply because one town away was too far to go. I missed family and friends' funerals.

i figure I'll delete this now as it's more about myself then him and his healing.

Thinking about things, maybe I'm being too needy and emotional. I should work on supporting him, getting him on his anti depressants and just communicating my needs in a thoughtful manner.

Hi ArsenicYellow,

I am going to start by saying that if you ever feel the need, you can always delete a post...

Okay, so geez, what a hard situation you are in! Your needs; emotional, physical and spiritual, are just as important as your boyfriend's. It is not overly needy to expect or have the desire for your needs to be met. Even if your boyfriends needs have to take precedence right now that does not invalidate your own.

I have to say that reading your posts makes me feel very torn. I applaud your support of your boyfriend and I know he is in a place that is just impossible. But it looks from here that you are getting a raw deal at least for the time being. I say this based not just on the CRPS but on the emotional challenges as well. I pray and hope that this is temporary and that helpful treatment and therapy will give him some of his life back and you the man you deserve. I think that for the time being it may be less painful for you to expect that your needs are going to be met elsewhere by friends or family. How your boyfriend could meet them in the midst of his current and very real crisis is hard to fathom.

The first few months are often the hardest and the stress and pain can definitely make people irritable and challenged to meet others needs. In the beginning I could hardly think of anything but my foot. This changed later on, largely after I started therapy that helped me address sadness, anxiety and anger. I find now that focusing on others needs is helpful to me personally. It gets me out of my own head and makes me feel more connected to the people in my life. I also find I have more sympathy in general for almost all forms of human suffering and pain (unless angst is caused by someone being overly spoiled perhaps). Pain is so subjective, I assume I can never know what another persons is like and can't assign a value to it. I only know that people suffer and we all fight a difficult battle some days.

Physical touch is important, sometimes especially so for the pain ridden. Getting positive input from our bodies is beneficial on many levels. If there is a way to have gentle touch of any kind be part of daily routine I encourage it strongly.

I know what it is to be in a dark place with this illness, a place that seems insurmountable, yet people come through it with Grace, strength and compassion. I see it everyday here on the forum. I always believe that there is hope, so I am sending some of it your boyfriend's way right now. Please take care of yourself and do whatever you need to maintain your own emotional and spiritual wellbeing during this difficult time. And Take time for your own enjoyment, carers get worn out for sure.