Hi Breezy,
I am so very sorry. It seems you are being hit at every angle. I know from experience.When my parents died, I did NOT have RSD. So that is a huge difference.I was 25 and health. My parents lived in Oregon and my husband and I lived across the country. But I am so very thankful I was able to go back and spend the last 4 months with my Mom. There was no hospice back in 1973, so I took care of here 24/7, learned to give shots, etc. My aunt and husband came out for the last month. 7 years later, my father developed heard disease, and my husband and I moved back. Dad lived a year, and I cooked two meals a day-he ate with us. My best friends mother, like a second mother to me, got Alzheimiers and was put in a home toward the end. I visited her weekly and the emotional pain of seeing her in that state was unbearable as was watching my mother slip away in death.
As I write this letter, my husband is getting ready to drive from Arizona to Washington State to see his mother. His dad died 4 years ago, and his mother still lives alone at age 86. She gets very very upset when we talk about assisted living. My husband has one sister that just lives a few blocks away, but she is 68 and has diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis, has had a heart attack, and generally feels terrible. My husband is 72 and is under the stress of caring for me, full body 13 yr patient of rsd. It's really tough trying to do your best in caring for elderly parents and they see things from their eyes only. My husband's sister doesn't get along with her mother or her father , when he was alive, for that matter. She talked her mother into getting a reverse mortgage, so she can drain all she can. Like charges her to go to the store, Dr. everything she can think of.
But that's no surprise. I just feel for my husband in having to have so mujch on his shoulders.
Please know that there are many of us that have been thru difficult circumstances, are thoughts and prayers go out to you. It did help when my husband got the State help that she qualified for. So many hours a week for house cleaning, grocery shopping, Dr. appointments. He calls his Mom every day and that helps. I call occassionally bot his Mom and Sister. Although sometimes that's a challenge. Please know we are thinking of you and realize what an emotional challenge this must be for you. Take care of yourself, loretta