I'm so sorry to hear about all this. Prayers being sent.

Sandy, sorry to hear this news.....keeping your mom in my thoughts.

Sox

Oh Sandy, I know exactly what you are going through right now. It isn't easy.

My mom is in a retirement community that has different levels of living arrangements. She is currently living in a studio type apartment where she can cook her own meals and basically live on her own with someone checking on her daily.

The center has two step up levels of care as needed for those who don't want to leave the facility.

We have decided that she can stay where she is and we are having Hospice come to her rather than move her to another room in the same complex. She is still able to cook for herself and when she is not able, the facility has a service whereby they will bring meals to her three times a day. We pick the menu for her, or she can, and they deliver them when she wants them, not at their convenience. We just discovered this service last week!

Your mom is probably more angry at what's happening b/c she is no longer in control and is lashing out at you and your sister. It's sad that she is so young and this is happening to her. She needs to see the doc ASAP and she certainly needs to have the car removed. You both know that. It's a liability that none of you want or need at this point.

The dilantin will certainly slow her down if it effects her like it did me! All I wanted to do was sleep!

You know you have our support Sandy. It's a tough time right now and you all certainly have your hands full. Take care...

Sandy, I just wanted to add my prayers for your family and your mom to all of the others. Hang in there! (I know that sound lame, but it is all I could come up with.) My dad had (possible) alzheimers for several years, so I know how tough this can be. The neuro's were never sure. But aricept did seem to help to a degree.

I just spoke with mom, well actually she screamed at me and I had to speak over her to get her to listen. She told me that we are not going to control her and that she is going to drive if she wants to, etc. I told her she did not earn the right to yell at me and that no she will not be driving, even if I have to come down and take her spark plugs out. I also told her that all her children are in agreement. I had to tell her that because she thinks me and Shannon are against her. Gotta pass the fun around to my brothers, right? She thinks the boys are angels I guess.

I hate this. God, please give me strength to not get upset and to not say something or do something that I will ultimately regret.

Oh Sandy I just came upon your thread. I'm so sorry you have to go through this...

How come the doc won't talk to you and your siblings knowing what she has been through and that if she won't communicate with them...well that's just stupid!!

Prayers going at you my dear...you take care...get your brothers involved like you said...

Ok, I had mom's brother call her and he seemed to calm her a bit. I told her about this assisted living facility that my grandma lived in and she didn't yell at me. This is a good sign and hopefully means she is somewhat accepting that something has to be done. But then again, this is mom's pattern.

The lady at the facility remembered my grandma and was so sad to hear about my mom. The facility is great. The residents are retired and the rent is income based. They all have their own apartment which has one bedroom. My grandma's apartment was so cute. The wait list is one year but we'll work around that and maybe help pay mom's rent until she can get on disability.

Monday is the neuro appointment and I'll update as soon as she sees the doctor. You guys are the best! Thanks so much for just listening and letting me vent. It's so hard to help her understand that we love her and only want what's best for her. She feels out of control and this has to be horrible for her to deal with. I remember when Jim went through this and was so young. I also listen when you guys write of your dismay and acceptance of stopping work. This place rocks.

I went out on my back patio today and took down the rest of my screen room brackets to clear my head. It was good therapy. Sun, sweat and hard work.

Mom should be coming up here by the end of July. She has to get all her appointments in and her financial situation under control. She will be losing her insurance in three months once the short term disability ends. Long term will kick in though so that will help and she is applying for ssdi and income based housing. The prayers are working! Thank you so much!

Hang in there, Sandy! It's got to be hard for you all seeing the changes in your Mother. I will continue to keep her and your family in my prayers.