Yes! Eye contact and he knows his stuff! His last name is Ripperda which makes me giggle a bit--I don't know why... it is just a fun last name. I was blessed with the boring last name of "Nelson" and then the name Sarah to boot--so I love unique names.

I do enjoy the PN forum, but I was happy to find out about this one as well. I also read a lot on the RSD/CPRS forum (at least for now--if it turns out that I don't have it, I will stop frequenting there), the spinal and back forum, and the chronic pain forum. I read, anyway--I don't always respond much because I don't usually know how to answer the questions that other people have. I do like reading, though--and I am finding a lot of people I think I could relate to.

I do like to laugh, and while the last few days have been major struggles, I still try to smile and laugh as much as I can. If I didn't, I would hit rock bottom on a daily basis. Between my back and my neuropathy, I've been told for years that it's a hopeless case and that I will live my life like this. Wonderful! If I couldn't laugh or smile, I would have no reason to live.

Unfortunately, the fentanyl patches haven't done a thing, really. The first one convinced me that it was giving me some relief. My main source of pain is constant lightning shocks every 15 or so seconds through my toes and feet. I went FOUR DAYS without shocks--3 of those days being when I had the first patch on. I was SO excited. Well, I think it was just a fluke, because the second, third, fourth, and fifth (that I just put on about 40 minutes ago) haven't done a thing for me. I am, however, at the lowest dose--25 mcg/hr. When I talk to my doctor on Monday about my vitamin levels (which I talked about in my CaringBridge and a post on the PN forum), I plan to ask how soon I can go up to a higher dose. I've been on this for 12 days or so (I think--3 days times 4 badges) and it just hasn't given me relief. He told me from the start, though, that since I have so much pain, I may not even respond to this dose and he would work me up slowly. So we'll see--I'm holding out hope that a higher dose will work... because without hope, I have nothing.

I am a bit worried about the psych eval. I had to have one before my gastric bypass surgery. I'm just worried that some of my discouragement with lack of pain relief will come off as depression. I've been very lucky and have not struggled with depression (not with this pain, anyway--I did back in high school). My pain management doctor said that studies show that someone with depression will not find much relief with the SCS--but people without depression have a high success rate. I don't understand why that is, but he said it's been proven, so I believe him. I know in my mind and heart that I am not depressed.. but that doesn't stop me from having bad days or weeks--and I don't want that to show through and look like depression. Other than that, I'm not worried... since I've already been through the process before.

My mom does come to all my appointments with me (I'm living with her now) since I am in a wheelchair and can't drive or wheel myself around (it kills my back!). However, she doesn't remember anything really that was said--haha. As time goes on, I will maybe have her take notes or something for me. I came home and wrote in my caringbridge about the SCS several hours after my doctor appointment Wednesday, and remembered almost every detail. Thankfully, I have a pretty decent memory, and am now off of all the medicines that really affected that.

That's nice that you are going to take a look at my website.. I try to update it often because a lot of family and friends read that to keep updated--that saves me from having to repeat myself a million times.

Thanks for your replies--it is so nice to meet people who understand a bit of what I am going through. Everyone here does seem very nice, so I look forward to meeting more people and getting to know you (and them) even more! Take care--hope you have a great week!