Here on this thread http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread163083.html, a few of us were talking about people who are not as understanding as we'd like. Dr. Smith brought up the idea of a buisiness-sized card with a list of things not to say to us that you could hand out to them. I thought that it would be fun to compile a list just for it's own sake, and if some of the entries made it onto such a card, great. If not, it would still be gratifying. I'm sure that not all will universally applicable.

I'll start with some of my favorites:

Maybe if you just exercised more, you'd feel better.

It's all mind over matter, you know.

Have you tried compression socks? (I have PN in my feet--just kill me now!)



I know you all have some gems too--show us what you got!

ANYONE who knows me realizes my body suffers from constant and permanent nerve pain. The back was healed through all of the interventional stuff.

My least favorite is "So, how's your back?"

When I was a teen with acne and people would ask "So, does that hurt?"

Oh, yeah. Cystic acne from age 12. The treatments back then were horrible and useless. Now I see (from other investigations) they're trying megadosing with B5 (pantothenic acid). Results are mixed, but it's one that can't hurt to try.

Doc

Like these? The problem is getting the list down small enough to fit on a card!

Things NOT to Say to Someone with Chronic Pain*
(*alternate: Disabling Chronic Condition)

But you don’t look sick
But you look so good
Maybe if you just got out more
If you’d get out more
If you just got out of the house
You can learn to live with it
You’ll just have to tough it out
It’s all in your head <--- This one's the biggie, right?
You’re just having a bad day
This will pass
This too shall pass
Just get more exercise
If you’d get more exercise
You just need to exercise more (and lose some weight)
I used to have chronic fatigue too – I just got active & it went away
It can’t be that bad
You can’t be in that much pain
It must be neat not to have to work
It must be nice not having to go to work
You’re so lucky to stay in bed all day
I wish I had time to take a nap
If you got more sleep, you'd feel better
Stop being lazy and get a job
My friend has back problems and still manages to work
You just need to get a hobby to take your mind off the pain
Just be more positive
You just need a more positive attitude
It could be worse
At least it's not fatal
There are people worse off than you
Everybody gets tired
Your illness is caused by stress
It's probably just a touch of arthritis
You’re just getting older
We all get more aches and pains as we get older
You’re just depressed
You just want attention
No pain – no gain!
Just pray harder
I've heard Fibromyalgia is just a diagnosis they give when there's really nothing wrong
When I get migraines, a brisk walk outside always helps take it away
I heard/read about this new product....

Doc

Will give it a try then. In the meantime, just feel blessed our kids got their Mom's genes in heavy doses.

Well lets hope the operation makes things better.

....."Just quit 'confessing' you are in pain and it'll all be better" "You're bringing this all on yourself you know!"

Thanks alot genious....you have no idea what I say or do in my private prayer life....
I'm not the heathen you think I am.....so ...... please go away

Is this in response to B5 or things not to say? (or both?)

Doc

You gotta read the whole bloomin post I write if you want to place it in context. Perhaps this is how the Robinson family got into trouble with a stowaway.

The entirety of my context was ...... if there were time travel, I could go back and use the treatment reply you suggested. Followed by our kids did not follow that particular gene path of my line, so they did not have to deal with it, making the thought irrelevant to my family in the present time.

So, I reckon you could say I wa off topic,
Yep,
Moi