... though it goes without saying that everyone is invited!

It's been a while since I've been on the board or had contact with anyone - and I'm just sat here wondering how everyone is and what's new?

I'm at the end of surgery. They will not operate on my back again - ever. Basically, having to remove my last SCS due to septicaemia, I gathered a nice lump of scar tissue around my lumbar area and they wouldn't even attempt an epidural nerve block.

So, it's medication and me from now on.

I'm not going to hang my hopes on any new things that turn up because, aswell as the scar tissue, I had complications during surgery and with infections so I wouldn't be looked on as a case to even 'consider' - so let's not go there hey?

I just want to see how everyone is? If anyone remembers me?

I've been doing ok ... I've got a brace for my left foot due to foot drop (nerve damage from the first operation) and my right foot I hurt when I fell over the rabbit fence and just kept falling over on it time and time again ... so they have given me a nice solid ankle splint for this too.

Have a cervical collar for my neck as I have disk bulge from there causing problems but they wont operate due to risks re. prior surgery . (They wont operate on right ankle for same and because I woulddn't be able to do the intensive re hab after the op)

However, that's the boring stuff out of the way.

I'm still smiley .. and still trying out different drugs

Our two girls have moved out and together with their boyfriends now have homes of their homes which is fab.

I've lost that guilty feeling I had because I couldn't work, and have now made it my job just to try and be happy every night.

M and I are managing fine and we still love our holidays to Greece. My Mum is still living on her own and celebrates her 90th birthday on 12th December ... which I'm so, so proud of.

It's Autumn here and I'm just about to go down and snuggle on the sofa for a while before bed.

Hope to hear from you soon.

All my love x x x

Oh my, I do have some awful news, in that the rabbit on the left in my profile pic, Benji, has died.

He was very old .. and I made the hardest decision I've had to, so far, in my life.

I miss him every day xxx

hi Saffy

you sound like your in a good place
i am happy for you and family
to have a mommy and partner
i just lost my municipal job this past April
with insurance
this has been very difficult to accept
there is no chance of a 9 to 5 job
my body also so screwed up
no doctors will do anything
and to be totally honest with you
i wouldn't ever have surgery
i am so done
my implants after breast surgery botched
and my dog is with my estranged eldest child
i have my seventeen year old
still yet to get her diploma
my granddaughter
my saving grace
my children living their own lives
my granddaughters mother is in a re-hab again i
continue to hope it happen one day sooner then later

i am trying to fight not only pain that takes me down
so badly i do not want to be here
doc added a quick 5mg oxycodone in my morning
dose with two more to follow in the day
what this has done was lift the pain enough in the morning
i will stick around
i promised my children i will not ever kill myself
yet i do not get the help from them as i very much deserve
and i too miss my dog

i hope to get to where you have gotten
it is a very slow long process
no money other than SSD child support
and all of it is gone to the obligations
my credit card bills from when i was working
and was able to make double payments
to minimum
when Corissa turns 18
everything becomes financially screwed
i won't be able to pay my obligation
so i don't know what to do
the water works already starting
i'm so frightened
for so many reasons
and i have no real outlet
i won't be able to make it
and the fear of getting older
and forever on meds
i don't know Saffy
i'm hanging on with the strength of
God the Father

keep smiling
be happy
happy family is well
love
me

Great to see you again! Same old same old here, got my 4th SCS in March. Had a nerve ablation in July. Didn't work this time. Such is life. Being able to work is coming to an end in the near future. Not ready for that but they keep pushing my limits despite my protests place is short of nurses, so they push us all . glad you still get your holidays

HUGZ

hHi Pooh and Eva ...

Eva you sound so low my friend. Pain tests each and everyone of us at one time or another.

I am feeling strong, so my shoulders can hold you burden should you need to,talk in pm? Xx

[QUOTE=Saffy;1183209]hHi Pooh and Eva ...

Eva you sound so low my friend. Pain tests each and everyone of us at one time or another.

I am feeling strong, so my shoulders can hold you burden should you need to,talk in pm? Xx[/QUOTE

And I will reach out when I need to
Thank you for the offer
I would to extend the same in return
Happy holidays to you and your loved ones
Love
Me