I'm not exactly sure when it started, but I know it was around 2009 when I started to lose interest in having sex. I wasn't on any antidepressants or anything of that nature until 2011 and it seems to have gotten worse since I bead counted myself off of the Cymbalta, that took 9 months to do. Luckily, I didn't have any major side-effects - or so I thought.

I used to have a very healthy sexual appetite. Now it's like I don't even want my fiance touching me. It was like that before him and the guy before him. It was nothing wrong with them - well, my ex-husband wouldn't wash his *** and had to be told - he also picked up a cigarette smoking habit. So add that on top of his poor hygiene practices he developed the moment we got married and that can kind of explain why I wouldn't touch him with someone else's poking stick. It doesn't explain the guy and my current fiance. Well, forget the other guy, my fiance is important at this point. I feel this issue is going to hinder our relationship. He doesn't seem to understand why I'm not in the mood - ever.

I don't understand why I'm not in the mood, either. I think about sex and I immediately thing "chore, a waste of time and energy, I could be reading a book" or something along those lines. The sex is fine, nothing wrong with how the sex is, it's just the idea of sex that makes me cringe. Would this have anything to do with my past? I was molested as a kid and it still has some effect on my life as an adult. Could those repressed memories have caused this or the antidepressants?

I get more joy out of pleasing myself than having sex with my partner and my mind is totally find with that.