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Old 03-01-2008, 12:58 PM #1
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Chat Discusion about MySpace/Facebook

i just want to get some feedback from any parents or anyone about those type of sites.

we had an inccent in my town where a 14 yr old girl "met" a 27 yr old guy on myspace. well...she ended up having him at her house for the weekend and he got caught by her mom on monday morning. ( i'll pm the news article if anyone wants it...i don't want to post the city i live in)

my daughter is 13. she has a myspace. it's a blocked one. add to that...she DOES NOT even have her own password. I DO. i check her messages. her friends know this.

plus our computer is not in a bedroom. it's out in the open. she has no internet access to the computer in her room. it's for games..and the schooling type of software...homework.

i guess it baffles me that parents don't have a clue what their kids are doing online. some of these young kids myspaces...way beyond their years.

guess i'm just frustrated. i see some of these girls that i have known since 1st grade making very choices. boys too for that matter.

do your kids have myspaces? do you check them? or do you think that is an "invasion of privacy" as one mother told me. i called her to tell her that her 14 yr old posted pictures of herself in her bra and a thong.
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Old 03-01-2008, 01:22 PM #2
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I think you did the right thing by telling that child's mother what type of pictures she was posting. I would have been mortified if I had a daughter that did that!!

My children (both boys) are grown (20 and 24) and they both have myspace pages. It's definitely not for me (I'm 47 and think this is more of a younger generation thing). I have looked at theirs and found nothing wrong with it - it's just not my "thing".

Now, if they were 13 or 14 years old I would definitely be keeping an eye on it. That's way to young to be left to their own devices on the Internet. Too many predators out there just waiting to pounce.
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Old 03-01-2008, 01:32 PM #3
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my older kids have ones too. since my daughter lives out of state, it's been an easy way for them to communicate daily.

i have one for our business. we own a health club and just started one. it will be used to send out fitness and diet tips..coupons..that type of thing. not a social thing.

but boy do i hear ya. not for me either. lots of weirdos.

i talked to my youngest daughter and her friends last night about this. you know how gossip mills get going. they think the girl is from their school. they went on to tell me horror stories about kids bragging about faking being sick. staying home all day messaging adults.

i know i am a SUPER protective mother. but it's child endangerment in my books. there is too muchon the news for parents not to know this happeneing.

ty
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Old 03-01-2008, 04:00 PM #4
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I'm on thin ice here, probably, but I'm not so sure how much privacy a child is "entitled" to. As parents, we are responsible for those little idiots until they are presumably old enough to be responsible for themselves, even though I believe their brains are made out of flubber until they're about 25 when it comes to making life decisions.
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Old 03-01-2008, 07:16 PM #5
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i think were their safety is concerned...their right to privacy goes out the window. i don;t think they are old enough to know the right judgement in these cases. maybe too naive?
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Old 03-01-2008, 07:29 PM #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Curious View Post
i think were their safety is concerned...their right to privacy goes out the window. i don;t think they are old enough to know the right judgement in these cases. maybe too naive?

Amen and Hallelujah!!!

I agree with everything you have posted and also agree with how you handle your daughter's online interactions. My kids do not and never will have internet access in their rooms. I even keep the main computer (in the middle of the game room) password locked and they have to ask me to unlock it.

This is a scary world and I think it is my right and responsibility to make sure that I have knowledge of and final say over what goes on in my kids' lives until they are old enough to make decisions. This does get me a lot of complaints from them and I will never be the "cool" mom, but I don't care. One day, I hope they will understand and thank me - until then I'm OK with the mean mom rap.
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Old 03-02-2008, 05:45 PM #7
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My house, my computer, my internet, my rules.

It took a long time for the DSD to learn this when she moved in. I had to resort to a program that controlled her access and could not be circumvented. Each time she tried, the program would notify me and she would lose her PC privileges for a set amount of time. It only took one or two times before she got the message.

I had access to everything she did or posted on the PC and could leave notes on her desktop when I found something I didn't like. I could block websites and access to messengers, block off the BIOS and the different drives so she could not change any settings on the PC. I could set the amount of time she could be online and what times she could be online.

The program is called Enuff ( as in I'VE had ENOUGH!) It was $40.00 or so, and worth every penny. She's off at college now but when the younger one comes for his weekends and vacations, it's already activated for him too! I'll take the mean old stepmonster label anytime when it comes to safety.
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Old 03-02-2008, 06:10 PM #8
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My kid's are grown and have flown the coop, but I just wanted to say that I applaud all parents who keep an eye on their kid's and PC use.

I have watched too many Dateline "To Catch a Predator" episodes to think otherwise. Kid's these days are exposed to enough out of their homes, so you betcha... Monitor those kids while they'e home... There are too many horror stories out there to think otherwise.

FWIW~~ I was a pretty strict Momma when my kid' were teens. They had many priviledges, as long as they didn't abuse them and they turned out pretty darn good.
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Old 03-03-2008, 06:50 PM #9
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My kids are older. They have had MySpace and now, Facebook, for many years. I have seen everything, the good and the bad.

I think it is wonderful that you check the computer to make sure your child is safe. I wish every parent was a vigilant as you.

My daughter is 18 years so I do not check her MySpace as often. I have her password and her Space is on private. She has so many friends but she can tell me who each person is and where she knows them from.

I have learned through the years to trust her. When I check, everything is very innocent. I am sure you will have the same experience with your daughter.

My DD leaves for college soon so I can only hope that her moral compass is ready for dorm life.

My only advice is to keep checking but as she gets to high school, give her enough rope to hang herself! And hope that she never does!

I wanted both my children to "fail" when they were in high school (that does not sound right...) rather than when I was not there to help them get back up again.

It is so true that with little ones, we have little problems and with big ones we have big problems.
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