Holly

I'm glad you're finding that Hospice is a good thing. I honestly don't know what we would have done without them. God bless those people who do that type of work every day.....they have a special calling for it.

I'm praying for you and your family as you take this journey with your Grandmother. I was with my Dad in hospice when he passed and they made it a peaceful, calm experience for all of us. I wasn't ready (who ever is?) but I knew he was and that's all that mattered.

Holly, Your grandmother reminds me of my FIL. But he has no place to go.
Bless you & yours for what you are doing.

hospice is amazing holly.
best to you and your family.
i'm glad they found a pain med that works for her.

I'm kind of melting down today. She is so much slower every day. What am I going to do when she's gone? She's my last older relative. My Grandpa's been gone since 1994, my mom died in 2006 (she was an only child), I never knew my biological father or his family. It will be just my brother and me left from my original family. I never thought I would have so little family left at age 39.

I'm sorry, it's just really hitting me today that I'm really going to lose her. I'm so confused because I really do want her to go and be at peace. I selfishly want to keep her, though.

Hi Holly:

Just happened to come across this thread.
Believe me, what you are doing for your beloved Grandma, well, let me assure you, you are an angel. And she knows this and she loves you.

You will learn to let go, when the time comes. For now, just hold her hand, and speak to her. She'll hear you and she'll be comforted.

I don't know if this is all on you, or do other members of your immediate household, speak to her also?? I know she probably does not respond, but this is a great learning tool for others.

Often, people don't know what happens during this time, (or they don't want to know). People shut down, or walk away, or just plain turn away.

You didn't do that and for that here's a hug.

I've been to many homes where there was hospice. And in my immediate family, my dad (when he lived in Florida), he had hospice. I will never forget all those lovely people, tapping on his hospital door and saying "Frank, we're here, how are you today?" and my dad's face would light up.

They came every day. In fact, I never got a moment alone with him, he was so busy talking to this gal, or that guy. My father loved all the attention and he actually thrived off of it. They had given him 18 months to live and he lived one more year (I believe this was because of all the good care he got and all those hospice people).

I learned much from that experience.

I learned that we each have a role on this earth. Some...more than others.

You are doing a good thing my dear.

You didn't have to.....you chose to.

Good job my dear.

Blessings,

Melody

Hospice are angels!

Holly...

Hang in there Holly. Grandma is proud of you.

Holly sorry if this makes you cry, just wanted you to know you have friends here who care for you I debated making this private or public deb said public so send hate mail to her

girl that last post of yours got me all teary eyed, it isnt easy, it never is, losing someone you love so much, the love is what makes it so much harder. but she will always be there in your heart along with mom and Grandpa. My dad is in my heart and i talk to him often, yes this may sound odd to some folks but he answers me, helps guide me. Grandma has had a good life and a wonderful friend in you, she is truly blessed to have you in her life, as are your friends. you are a wonderful caring loving person, thats what makes it harder. its those who have a heart that the loss of loved ones hit hardest, you have many friends here and a lot of us would squeeze you so hard you would need a body cast. You keep loving grandma now and always, and grandma shall never leave your heart

how can we let go, when our heart says no
how can we try, when deep inside we want to cry
how can this be, when its her face i want to always see
how can i let go, when being with her is all i know
how can i say say goodbye, and trying not to cry
how can I see, from her pains she is free
how can i say i miss you so, and please dont go
how can i say i shall be blue, and grandma I love you

hope i didnt goof by making this public, sorry if i did all of debbies and my prayers and thoughts

You didn't goof, Frank. That was beautiful. It did make me cry, but that's OK. Don't you know that your wife is always right?? That is what I tell my DH.

I guess now you know why something as stupid as being kidnapped over on FB is so amusing to me right now. I like the diversion of it. Now, if only I could actually be kidnapped and taken somewhere in real life.....

Hey Holly, had not been on this thread, I think I was shy, with my sister gone, and now my father fighting the cancer fight... just a bit emotional for me... I am emotional even when there is not anything to be emotional about!!

I am thinking of you, I am hugging you tight, !! we are here for you, and tears are a GOOD thing for you, a release, no matter how many times you tear up..that is Aok!!

I am glad you have her there, good for you for doing that, you are wonderful for that!! Hospice is a great service glad you have that too.

Frank made me cry too, and glad he did the poem publicly, Is he just the greatest, although we keep having to remind him his wife is always right!!

FRANK WIVES ARE ALWAYS ALWAYS RIGHT!!!! hugss

hugss to you holly, sorry it took me a few days to get on here and type, hugssssss,sarah (another one here for you when you need hugsss)

I'm freaking out. She is completely out of her mind right now. She is not making any sense, she is talking to people who aren't there (my Grandpa, her cousin), seeing things, can't remember that she is immobile and forgets that she has a catheter.

She keeps telling me over and over that she has to get up to pee and I keep reminding her that she has a catheter. This is every five minutes! She has had a catheter for about 2 months now, but suddenly she doesn't know.

The scariest part is that she gets mad at me because I don't understand what she is looking for. Is she going to die thinking I'm mean because I won't take her to the bathroom to pee? This is by far the most disturbing part of this. It's just not fair for someone to suffer so much. I had to leave the room because I just couldn't take it.