[Michelle61]

I have a question about receiving SSDI if a grandchild lives with you. My son and his ex-wife have joint physical and legal custody of my 8 year old grandson. Unfortunately, she only comes around once a month, and my son works nights. The court said three years ago that i was the recommended person to care for my grandson when he was not with them. It is much easier for me to have him here than to have to go to my son's place every day, and I cannot live with my son. He stays here and my son sees him almost every day. If I am approved for my SSDI will it matter if my grandson is here with me? Any help would be appreciated.

[LIT LOVE]

Even your ability to care for yourself is considered. Your daily activities are important, not your living situation, I believe. (If you're caring for an infant full-time, without any help, it might be questionable...With an older child that requires fewer physical demands, I doubt it'll be any issue.) Add in that you're providing care at night, I would assume this isn't physically demanding. At the ages of 50 and 55, the standard is slightly lowered for qualifying for SSDI, due to the "grid rules." If you haven't yet read the "before you apply" sticky, it will help. There are many factors that go into an SSDI decision, severity of disability is key.

[Michelle61]

I have always tried to do the right thing by my grandson because his mother is absent, and he is very independent so i don't have to do much for him. Having him here so much actually helps me so i don't just sleep in my chair all day and night. My son has custody and is financially responsible for him. I just don't know if his sleeping here 4 or 5 nights a week constitutes "living" here, and whether I would lose my disability because of it.

[LIT LOVE]

His living with you will not be "held against" you. What matters is if you're capable of working any job over the SGA level. Your daily activities help to show the severity of your disability. Do you claim your grandson on your taxes? Do you use Your home address as your grandson's legal mailing address? If you answer no to both those questions, then he does not live with you. You can't hide your care of him, but what do you do for him? Do you do all his laundry, cook all his meals, drive him to school, etc.? Does your spouse contribute to his and your care? Or is he just sleeping in your home?

I think this is one of those occasions where you're worrying about something that is likely a very minor issue. Have you filed an application yet?

[Michelle61]

Lit, I have just been approved for SSDI and went down to file for SSI until my checks start coming. Thats when I began to think there might be a problem. I had reported on the function report that i help with him, and that he is very independent and i don't have to do much physically for him. But i didn't go into detail due to limited space. At the time i filed, I had him less. Now that he is here more i have begun to worry because i want to do the right thing. I do not claim him in any way financially. My son takes care of that. His legal address is my son's. I may drive him to school because i don't have to get out of the car for that, but his dad or my ex husband usually pick him up. He's in school all day and goes to bed around 9:30 at night. He showers, dresses himself- will come in after school and make a sandwich before doing his homework etc. He eats whatever dinner I am able to make that night. We do read, play games together. What he gives ME is much more than any small physical output I make for him. I have to call the SSI worker next week, I will talk to her about it at that time. Meantime, I will pray. Thanks.

[LIT LOVE]

There is no reason to report this! You're not doing anything unethical. Even if you were to go out an adopt a child after the fact, it wouldn't be an issue. If your condition improves, you have an obligation to notify SS. If you start working, you have an obligation to notify SS.

Your son is not paying you, correct? If not, please put this out of your mind. If you feel you can manage to work, then consider using the Ticket to Work program. If your disability is severe enough that that is not an option, even if you never watched your grandson again, than you have nothing to feel bad about! You do not have to feel guilty for having a life. You can go on vacation. Have hobbies. Etc.

Social Security will send you a booklet if they haven't already done so explaining what you must report. Follow the rules. Don't add new ones!

Originally Posted by Michelle61

Lit, I have just been approved for SSDI and went down to file for SSI until my checks start coming. Thats when I began to think there might be a problem. I had reported on the function report that i help with him, and that he is very independent and i don't have to do much physically for him. But i didn't go into detail due to limited space. At the time i filed, I had him less. Now that he is here more i have begun to worry because i want to do the right thing. I do not claim him in any way financially. My son takes care of that. His legal address is my son's. I may drive him to school because i don't have to get out of the car for that, but his dad or my ex husband usually pick him up. He's in school all day and goes to bed around 9:30 at night. He showers, dresses himself- will come in after school and make a sandwich before doing his homework etc. He eats whatever dinner I am able to make that night. We do read, play games together. What he gives ME is much more than any small physical output I make for him. I have to call the SSI worker next week, I will talk to her about it at that time. Meantime, I will pray. Thanks.

[Michelle61]

Sorry for freaking out. I get nothing for his care except the privilege of being with him and a reason to get out of my chair. Thank you.

[LIT LOVE]

Originally Posted by Michelle61

Sorry for freaking out. I get nothing for his care except the privilege of being with him and a reason to get out of my chair. Thank you.

No problem! It's better to ask questions than sit and worry. And I appreciate that you are ethical!