Hi, Idealist.

I, too, went several years to apply after first having a doctor telling me to do so. I felt it was a step into "official failure" status, and I just wasn't ready or willing to accept that I hadn't been able to handle things for many years and needed assistance.

I, too, have had family members having problems with me, but mainly because I am seen as an embarrassment to the family.

But let me suggest something to you. I had seen so many people fretting about their checks, when would be coming, getting transportation to get them cashed, the embarrassment, like you spoke about. I bypassed all that. I went to a bank (BOA) that gave me free checking and a debit card that has a Visa emblem (some banks have a MasterCard) - all in exchange for my being willing to have my check be electronically deposited.

It is an immensely civilized way to live. Most retired persons have direct deposit, and there is no shame and the bank tellers (when I go in a time or two a year) treat me as nicely as if I had a million dollars on deposit.

Ignore your family, they are just ignorant (and cruel). You can do better than them for friends.

Hugs,
Teri

I to went thru and are still going thru it. But it is my family (son ) that has doubts that I am really "hurting"...

It took me a while to file also. I have had people ask me "where are you working now" and when I say that I am not, thay look at me with a crooked head and ask why I tell them that I am hurt and waiting for SSI.

Boy do they look at me with questions.. like where ?? So I tell them and one person even said that I didn't look hurt why am I not working ?? Like you said Ignorance....Just put the smile on .....

Ah Dolfinz, I can so relate...

When you say, "I just hated making $2000+ a month and decided I just couldn't pass up the chance to live on $620 a month instead," it is great to see the look on their faces...

... Or if you hate making them look and feel totally stupid, you can always say, "For me, it is the relentless pain that leaves me unable to work... but for a full technical explanation of my neurological syndrome, to understand why I have so much pain, I guess you would have to read the stacks of medical reports from my doctors and surgeons who say I need to do this."

Just NEVER let yourself feel less valuable as a human being. Disabled or not, we are worthy of love, respect and consideration.

Teri

My career was just taking off, I was the Marketing Dir at a casino. The pay was great, and it was very hard to say "I give".

Why would anyone take disability over a good paying job? I dont know, maybe cause WE HURT!!! I think the mind game we have to live with is sometimes more horrific than the actual pain.

For me it was twice as bad cause a doctor made a mistake on me, and I couldnt sue!! So now im all messed up with zero income, and feel terrible because I feel like im dragging my family down the poverty highway with me.

Luckly they all support me, but I still feel bad. Social security for me will give me a little dignity back, at least I wont be a total leech.

So dont let people get to ya, remember they all would do the very same thing if in your shoes. :icon_wink: