Thanks for all the kind words. I still am in distress, but I am feeling a bit better. My parents found a note, panicked, and have taken me to my college to see friends and regain hope. They didn't think the bed ridden stuff alone at home was helping my psyche. I am still unsure about returning to school but if my outlook and pain improves I may to keep myself sane. I still feel very suicidal but I am trying to cope. My pain is somewhat better after two nerve blocks and I am praying that they will heal and put this in a state of remission. All I have is faith, but even so I still have little desire to live if this remains the rest of my life.