A mind of its own
 

To wonder as I do every single day
Are or rather is my family doing well
To wonder if your children are happy
To wonder if they still blame me and God for their unhappiness
Not something I can stop my brain from wondering
What my children are exhibiting are many symptoms
of the MTHFR MUTATION
wonder why my son stopped his meds
Bi-polar from me
Me
And to let them know
and not do anything about it
Is then on them
How much more can I do
I told them
I am the one for certain can and till now
those tested are positive
So many things going on under this particular umbrella
Labeled MTHFR MUTATION
WONDER what Eva's mother has to say about her knowing she is positive and addict so many of her symptoms answered
and just got off the phone with trying to express what her sister is wondering when I told her
Wonder about this you have occipital lobe epilepsy
Chances you are positive
And ponder on this
Your doctor should wonder real seriously about finding out if she to is positive
And not God
Wonder what my youngest is doing
If she is wondering about us
and how much I miss her and wish she would change
and come back home
My child's father knows about her getting high
Wonder what he is thinking
He told me his opinion about my parenting
Only she is worse off in the current situation
So many lies that are being shared
And hurting each other doing it
Do they not wonder
Something is REALLY wrong
So wondered
Rather then help them see the
Unappreciative response and behavior
my children put upon me in their thirties now
And still blame me
Now because it isn't recognized
I ask the question
"What haven't I done for all of you guy's"
Silence
Not a thing to speak of
But to wonder if my youngest is still in the hospital
And not call me
Or my children not call me
Isn't okay
They will never know a mothers worry
And she nor my son are parents
I am gifted from my third child
Wondering when she too will take care of herself
She is returning back to waitressing
And not pursue her phlebotomist license
This I cannot stop wondering about
Or to use her culinary degree
Wondering
Left here sad
Wondering
Wondering if Heavenly Father touch my sister
She helped me so much
She loves me
My baby sister
Wondering
Me

l wonder why I can't just talk on this pad like I do on my phone

I wonder if Eva knows that I thought about her on Mothers day said a quiet prayer that her children would show her a little love.

I wonder that I have galloping poison ivy :o

I wonder what the realtor will tell us tomorrow about selling this old house now that she has researched it for a week.

I wonder about the tragic suicide death of our daughter friend and the heartbreaking honesty in her obituary. :( .

l wonder if I can leave hugs for the room

I wonder if Eva knows if she is in my thoughts :hug:

I wonder if Alffe's poison ivy will get better soon? :hug:

I wonder if Alffe knows how sad I feel for her friends' loss, while still feeling conflicted about hearing there was "heartbreaking honesty" in the obituary :hug::hug::hug:

I wonder about all this stinkin, rainy, flooding, tornadic weather we have been having. makes it very triggering. sigh.... Friday will be the one year anniv of my younger brothers drowning.

i wonder if it is ok to admit the "dark side" has sure been calling my name the past couple months.

wondering if i can leave a hug for our room :hug:

Goofy
 

How right you are about the weather
It certainly is a trigger
Wonder if I could tell you
I am right there with you
However
You and I breath for a reason
I wonder what it is I need to still have to experience
For the dark side is close
Wonder if the light could shine for us
Wonder if we could find the sun inside us how differently
we would feel
Trigger the weather has been hurtful
Barometer killing everything
Goofy
Wonder if I could mention how awesome this place is
Not able to understand why I am going through the stuff
at hand
I just don't understand it
Yet I trust it will reveal a sunny day
And a happy smile in our heart and soul
We are important
You are important
We a have a purpose
Thank you for sharing
I feel horrible simply from how the weather is this morning
I will push through the day
May your heart feel the sun
Love
Me

I wonder if Goofy knows it takes strength to admit that the "dark side" has been calling and a lot of self-awareness to recognize our own triggers :hug:

I wonder if everyone effected by the harsh weather lately knows I am thinking of them, and hope that they, their loved ones, and their property are safe :hug:

I Have Wandered
 

Oh yes, I have wandered
Filled with wonder
Driven by overwhelming issues
Of family
And of work
And of life
Yet I have wondered how my friends here have fared
Praying in wonder that calls from the dark will go unfollowed
Wondering how all have been through Mother's Day and myriad graduation
Wondering at life which launches anew for many who have achieved degrees
Wondering at creeping Poison Ivy? Oh....itch!
Wondering at changes in life, and praying for the best
Wondering why we endured the blaring sun for so long from the skylight in our bedroom!!!! Oh, the blissful restfulness of a Saturday morning sleeping in because we inexpensively jammed foam in that blasted skylight thus darkening our room......YAY!
Wondering that it took me so long to return here among you......

I made a bond
 

Wonder if I could hold on for just a bit longer
as I am withering slowly and it s.u.c.k.s
So much energy is taken out of me in my day
Wonder how much longer it will be this hard
Wonder if we could get lucky enough to hit the numbers
and there be some financial relief
Wonder how it will be as time goes on
it is a small income I am working with
It is so difficult to not wonder how it got like this
How did it all get like this
Wonder if My desires will fade
People are not in my life
It to by choice
There is no true relationship
I can speak of that doesn't require approval from
And this I do not need
I look to Heavenly Father and ask for true sincere love in return
Not a hard thing for me to do
Yet for strangers to judge and pull one down for ones own selfish reasons not what I look for
Wonder if my father is the one who suffered with the mutation and it be the base host of all his problems
I still wonder about him
Just this weekend
Me and my sister were talking about the day
She tells me
Her then grammer school teacher she seen many years later
told her how she heard the shot early in the morning of April 8th
thinking it was her veteran father with his guns
Wonder how many others heard the shot
He was found in the second car
white station wagon
Around the corner from the house
What was he feeling
How sad must he have been
To endure sadness like mine
Makes me wonder

I wonder if we will survive europe

I wonder if Bizi knows I miss her, and know she and Jeff will have a wonderful time and a safe return :hug::hug::hug: