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Old 11-13-2011, 07:02 PM #1
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Default I've probably asked this before... But anyway...

How do you all keep going? I have hit a rough patch. My legs are in constant pain, my brain is in constant fog mode, and I am leaking when it's most inconvenient, along with IBS sxs that make me afraid to leave the house.

I have confessed to DH that I want to disappear. There is a large part of me that sits on the bleachers, not getting engaged at all emotionally. I feel so empty & without purpose, and feel as if I am wasting the oxygen I breathe. How do you find purpose in the face of pain & the inability to really do anything of importance?
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Old 11-13-2011, 09:38 PM #2
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(((((DebbieD)))))

On days like that Deb, I don't know. There must still be a reason for our being here. For me, it's family. Although I sometimes feel I need them more than they need me, it's really a mutual thing and it's called love.

So, on the bad days, give yourself a hug and know that you are loved and I/we all will pray that your pain and sadness goes away.
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Old 11-13-2011, 11:45 PM #3
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(((((DebbieD)))))

On days like that Deb, I don't know. There must still be a reason for our being here. For me, it's family. Although I sometimes feel I need them more than they need me, it's really a mutual thing and it's called love.

So, on the bad days, give yourself a hug and know that you are loved and I/we all will pray that your pain and sadness goes away.
I would say I have to agree. I'm sorry you're having such a rough go right now! I hope things get better soon!
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Old 11-14-2011, 10:12 AM #4
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That is exactly what I was just complaining to my neuro about. Thankfully, he heard me and is trying to help. He said I'm too young to feel this bad and wants to help me get my life back.

I think that honestly, if I didn't have kids at home, it would be easy to give up. I don't really have a chance to curl up in a ball like I would like to most days because I'm the mom.

I really think you should speak to your neuro and find a good therapist. There's too much life left to live to feel this way.
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:17 PM #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Debbie D View Post
How do you all keep going? I have hit a rough patch. My legs are in constant pain, my brain is in constant fog mode, and I am leaking when it's most inconvenient, along with IBS sxs that make me afraid to leave the house.

I have confessed to DH that I want to disappear. There is a large part of me that sits on the bleachers, not getting engaged at all emotionally. I feel so empty & without purpose, and feel as if I am wasting the oxygen I breathe. How do you find purpose in the face of pain & the inability to really do anything of importance?
These are magic questions, huh? I go through this all the time. But, when I feel good, my purpose and drive to keep going is full force. When I'm having a rough MS day, it's hard to keep my focus. It is the good days that keep me going.

But you do have a purpose. Right now you have a lot going on with your in-laws which only adds to how you are feeling. You are a very kind and compassionate person and I have learned so much from you as well as you being an inspiration to me to keep going. So, with that said, you do have a purpose and you do have a positive effect on others. You may not feel as though you do but you are far more important in this world than you are giving yourself credit for. Now, chin up, dear and know that you are loved and admired by many.
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:41 PM #6
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Nice to see you, Trish..
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Old 11-14-2011, 01:21 PM #7
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I know where that dark place is, Debbie. It's a place where "look on the bright side, count your blessings" doesn't help. "Get a grip" doesn't help. Some days it feels like it's a lot of work to muster much more than "Whatever."

You said a couple of things in your post...you asked how we "keep going". Sometimes that's all you can do is keep going, and it's the most important thing you can do. Then try to hold on to the truth that it really IS a rough "patch". Just a patch. Not forever. No matter if you feel that way or not. Don't trust your feelings. Just hold on tight to the things you know are true.

Sometimes life sucks. Sometimes it sucks for a long time. When you hear that voice starting to tell you lies (no one cares, they'd be better off without me, I'm just taking up space, etc.) DON'T LISTEN!! They are LIES! See a counselor, come here and talk, PM somebody, do whatever you have to do.

One of the biggest lies is "nobody understands". Oh yes, somebody does. I can share things here that I can't lay on my children, things that my husband (God bless him) just doesn't have the capacity to identify with.

Almost all of us have been under the rock sometimes. You'd be surprised how many are there at this very moment. You're not alone. We don't all get out from under the same way. Some can leap, some crawl inch by inch. But there's always a way. I'll say it again: You are NOT alone.
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Old 11-14-2011, 10:25 PM #8
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I am so touched by you all sharing these very important thoughts...as you all know, these symptoms are so very frustrating to deal with and can drain all of the energy, energy that is sometimes needed to keep going.
I need to keep going-you're all so correct. It would tear my family apart...

Thank you all again...and please keep me in your prayers so I can get through this...I've been in therapy off & on when it gets bad; I have the tools but I don't always have the wherewithal to fight.
I DO need to remember to allow these thoughts to move through and out of my brain...I will continue to tell myself all that you have shared here so that I come back to myself and let Gods light shine through me again...
Blessings to all of you...I am so lucky to have you all!
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:02 AM #9
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Default Debbie

Quote:
Originally Posted by Debbie D View Post
I am so touched by you all sharing these very important thoughts...as you all know, these symptoms are so very frustrating to deal with and can drain all of the energy, energy that is sometimes needed to keep going.
I need to keep going-you're all so correct. It would tear my family apart...

Thank you all again...and please keep me in your prayers so I can get through this...I've been in therapy off & on when it gets bad; I have the tools but I don't always have the wherewithal to fight.
I DO need to remember to allow these thoughts to move through and out of my brain...I will continue to tell myself all that you have shared here so that I come back to myself and let Gods light shine through me again...
Blessings to all of you...I am so lucky to have you all!
We are lucky to have someone like you to remind us it's a "patch". With the help of God, I pray each night for the Grace to make to most of each day He has granted me. I pray this night for you as well.
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:05 AM #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Debbie D View Post
I am so touched by you all sharing these very important thoughts...as you all know, these symptoms are so very frustrating to deal with and can drain all of the energy, energy that is sometimes needed to keep going.
I need to keep going-you're all so correct. It would tear my family apart...

Thank you all again...and please keep me in your prayers so I can get through this...I've been in therapy off & on when it gets bad; I have the tools but I don't always have the wherewithal to fight.
I DO need to remember to allow these thoughts to move through and out of my brain...I will continue to tell myself all that you have shared here so that I come back to myself and let Gods light shine through me again...
Blessings to all of you...I am so lucky to have you all!
We are lucky to have someone like you to remind us it's a "patch". With the help of God, I pray each night for the Grace to make the most of each day He has granted me. I pray this night for you as well.
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