you are my hero! You took on Virgin mobile and WON! that is so hard to do. To cancel a cell phone contract is liking getting out a contract with the mob. They are pushy, rude, snotty, and keep telling you what YOU want. if you express yourself and tell them YOUR needs, they interrupt you and tell you that you dont know what you need. Makes you want to drive down there and start clawing folks. This sets you up to feel dismissed, disrespected, completely unheard. This can spill over into many areas of your life and make you strong enough to chew barbed wire.

I am glad your husband heard you. Perhaps he is one of those that needs to mull over what he is being told and to feel the threat of being alone before he will move off his hot rock. Keep telling him that you are not his child, you are his wife and as such you deserve respect. There really is a difference between being loved and being respected. You can be truly loved and yet really disrespected. I have been telling my son for a year now that yes, his g/f loves him, but she doesnt respect him. He needs to work on that.

You brought tears to my eyes with your journey. Please know that you did a good job! Stand up and RAWR! say NO! Say Go WITHOUT ME! Say LEAVE ME ALONE and then let him work out his own problems. "im going to the hot dog place tonight, if you want to eat dinner with me, then you will join me there. if not, have fun at Bob Evans."

Im so proud of you!

Well said Dejibo. To that I could not add another thing.

With love, Erika

Glad your day ended on a calm and peaceful note.

It's so hard when dealing with difficult people because we want (and need) to be an example to and for them. It's a real test of our patience and our self control. I think you did a wonderful job.

Don't expect a 100% transformation in him overnight. It'll be an ongoing and uphill battle. But I believe you have the strength to see it through. As for your hubby.......well, I'm prayin' for strength for him, too.

for Virgin issues:

I suggest you file acomplaint with Indiana Utility Regulatory Commission (they oversee telecommunication companies such as Virgini Mobile). Trust me, this usually gets you a very swift response, as the State will get involved - and no company wants to be on their bad list!

Local phone 317-232-2712 or toll free 1-800-851-4268

here is the web address to file a complaint online:
http://www.in.gov/iurc/consumer/complaint_form.html

Thank you so much for that suggestion

I work with a girl whose husband has always been a loving father; but, he's a controlling,whiney, miserably b*st*rd to her. He calls her at work to make sure she's really there, told her she can't talk to any men while at work (like she can help that), won't let her talk to former co-workers, he hates her family & complains about the time her parents spend with their children & he has hit her in the past (even fracturing her skull). We can thank him for the nearly ruined Christmas party last year (he got drunk...it happens alot) when he told our BIG boss (the company owner) that he didn't care to have him monopolize HIS wife...she has to interact with the boss at work but not while out with her husband!

This co-worker got brave a year ago & walked out after a particularly bad fight & called the police...only to go back to him when he promised to behave. He's been told by both of us that even one bruise is seen on her...we'll turn him in. They have two little girls. We are currently supportive however I am wary about him; it's been a very long time since we've been in his face & he's now home from work for an extended time & he's starting to act up.

These types of men are DANGEROUS. They don't change...they can't because they rationalize that you are their PROPERTY. Please...please...please...stick to your guns & make changes. I wish that she would. I'd hate to have to go to a funeral or hear about yours.

Thank you new2net. Believe me if my husband had been like that we would have had seperate addresses a long time ago. I am proud that 4 40 years we have weathered a lot of storms, I had a wonderful job that I loved and sustained me, he had a good job which he hated but he stuck with it. My oldest daughter says that she totally knows all of her Dad's bad traits but it has only made her sttronger and has helped her in what she expects in a good man. She loves the fact that even with all her faults through her high school years that her Dad never gave up on her. Our other daughter just rebelled all the more. They have never felt restriced. i haven't either. There are many times I know when to speak my opinion and when not to. there are times we can sit and talk. I know I am not going to change some of his opinions. But at least when he finishes being mad, and it doesn't take that long for him to get over it that he sits and thinks. And he makes some changes accordingly. I must say he is a project in progress, one little stap at a time. Sometimes it's two steps forward and one step back. Right now he is accepting that I want to contuinue tring to be as independent as I can. I have remonded him that from 1999 to Dec of 2010 I had been very independent and asked him if the reason he wants to take me everywhere, do everything with me is because he is bored. He totally admits that. So he let me drive to the little town about 30 minutes from us where my beautician is. He still asked but accepted it when I said no. I thought about ccalling him when I got there but if I did that I would only be allowing him to control.. I am also going out this weekend to buy a new ohone, I will have a seperate thread about that. It was hard but he said OK. My daughter will be going but We are going to make an afternoon over it. He also told me that he didn't care what I pay for it. He said if I even needed to go to $300 that I could. I told him that I had already decided that I was going to ned to do that on my own. To that he just laughed.